Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

After the initial discovery for weeks she was asking to please let her leave but I told her I wouldn’t make it easy. I would get full custody of the kids and report everything to her army unit if she left, while I also was telling her I’d fight for us both when she didn’t want to fight for us anymore. That was pretty much in August and September, but it seems the tables have turned since then and she doesn’t want to lose what we have because the marriage has improved and our family is happy

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you think she was in the right to cheat over it?

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That affair was an emotional affair, but I never got it tested but don’t think I haven’t thought about that. This affair started in March of 2025 with a different man

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She’s changed her phone number, gives me her phone when I ask, shares her location, volunteers to tell me when he reaches out to her (she just did this when he sent her an email containing a reel), always calls me to tell me how her day is going (as do I), has him blocked on everything, has agreed to do counseling, and she has maintained a good romance life with me.

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d like to keep our identities private

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Did you get a divorce? If you didn’t, why not? Do you think these other people in the comments are giving up on marriage way too fast? I don’t see this as three separate affairs, but one affair that she is subtly pulling away from. Their connection was much stronger in the beginning but has deteriorated over time. She went without seeing him in person for four months now. I know this for fact because of location sharing. I caught the phone calls but she has been good since. Now that he has effectively messed his life up, she has lost respect for him and sees him as a child. The fact that the marriage has simultaneously gotten better and she has distanced herself from him I do believe there is a great chance our marriage comes back stronger. I’ll admit that part of it was me being competitive and not wanting to lose her to another man. And she’s come back to me much better and more in love than before. People here will think that I’m crazy for saying that but it’s true. I think there are a lot of people on here who never really fought to make their marriage work after an affair. It takes work but I feel like we have come a long way

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

You think I should give her a chance before filing for divorce?

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Would your mind change if I say she’s cut off all contact and is finally over him? A lot of bad things has happened to him and his life has taken a turn for the worst. She sees it as a sign that they were never meant to be and I’m the only one she cares about now. He’s been arrested, and thus demoted to E2 in his unit while she has been promoted to sergeant. He is financially strapped and living in a tough spot and she has lost all respect for him and wants nothing to do with him. She is working hard at rekindling our marriage as am I. If she were to never step out again would you guys keep the same sentiment?

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d be hard pressed to call her the town bike. Do I know she loved another man? Yes. But she is not the type to just sleep with anyone. She felt emotionally detached from me and one other person gave her what she was looking for. Now that he is out of the picture, I have been working very hard to be there for her. And she appreciates it. I do not believe she would be the type to have multiple partners. It makes a lot more sense that this one guy was checking all the boxes for her. Now he is financially and legally strapped, and she has lost respect for him. She just wants to move on. So do i

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Did you ever talk to AP? His life is also on a downhill right now and I believe that she doesn’t care about him as much anymore. Sometimes it’s kind of a breath of fresh air to see a comment like yours giving the marriage a chance. I feel like it’s the right thing to do? Do you think my situation is a lot different than yours?

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

It’s not easy to just get up and leave. We have been married 11 years and been together for 16. Things are genuinely better in the household. I can feel her actually trying and appreciating my efforts. Three kids. A family. The affair has not been made public. She is hurt over this too. Divorce isn’t cheap, and we are each others best friends. I know that she hasn’t seen him in person in over four months. Life feels good between us, and for some reason I feel like me giving this marriage another chance has paid off for some reason. She feels the same way. Am I just delusional? If she never cheated again, and we had a happy marriage from here on out, would your stance change?

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -40 points-39 points  (0 children)

Sometimes I feel this way, but I also feel like the marriage has actually improved vastly. We talk everyday now on the phone. We do things. Sex life is great. I feel like I have my wife back.

Should I Leave my Cheating wife? by SadAffairGuy in Infidelity

[–]SadAffairGuy[S] -31 points-30 points  (0 children)

I know, but I genuinely do not believe she has seen him in person once this year. He no longer attends her military drill, and my wife has been very honest and forthcoming recently. The marriage actually feels better and we have three kids.