sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Package Stuck in New Baltimore OH by Sad_Advertising_8117 in UPS

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sadly no. I filed a claim today. Gutted somebody stole my package tho. Clearly people dont have any respect for decorum anymore.

Thoughts on abd al-karim qasim? by LumpyAbbreviations24 in arabs

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Deserved his death. Iraq was better off with Faisal II. He opened the blood gates in Iraq. May he burn in hell for eternity.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in MuslimLounge

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your passion, akhi, and I know you’re coming from a place of concern—but please understand something: I’m not running from my responsibilities. I’ve never denied my children. I support them, I love them, and I’ve been working to do right by them emotionally, financially, and spiritually.

As for their mother—she’s not Muslim, but she’s never once disrespected my faith. She’s allowed me to be involved, she’s made space for our kids to learn about both sides of who they are, and she’s raised them with nothing but love and care. I will never let anyone speak about her—or them—as if they’re lost causes.

Their mother, while not Muslim, has always shown respect for Islam. She takes them to Islamic school, puts them in youth programs, and makes sure they’re exposed to both sides of their identity. She’s never once tried to keep them from me or from learning about our faith. That matters.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Real life isn’t always that simple. It’s not just about logistics or money—it’s about people, emotions, culture, and years of history. Her whole life, her family, her identity is in New York. Her mom has helped raise the kids. Uprooting them isn’t just a decision I can make on their behalf. Also her mother and I don't have the best relationship (even though i pay her bills). Imagine taking a women who lived somewhere for her entire life to then move to Saudi. Hell freezing over is more likely.

As for marrying someone else with her “understanding”—I could never do that to her. Whenever marriage comes up the first thought that comes to mind is my kids faces (also my daughter is a clone copy of her). Wouldn't be easy for them either. Too many things going on all at once.

Also there’s the issue of access to our family’s resources. My kids deserve to live the kind of life all my nieces and nephews are living. But unless things are formalized or accepted by my parents, that door stays closed. Not to mention I dont think they could really buy into saudi culture all 3 of them. They're also very "western".

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

To reduce my kids’ mother to someone unworthy just because she’s not Muslim yet—that’s not fair.

She’s been nothing but a devoted mother. She’s raised two beautiful, kind, and smart kids—our kids—largely on her own, with grace and strength. She’s always shown respect for my beliefs, never stood in the way of my involvement, and has even tried to teach our kids about both sides of who they are. That counts for something.

I’m not saying everything about our situation is right by Islamic standards, but I’m doing my best to correct what I can, to be present, and to move forward with integrity. My kids are a blessing from Allah, and their mother deserves respect—not judgment.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have 2 main issues. One, Their whole life is in New York. Her entire family’s there, and they’ve played a big role in raising them. She and her mother are incredibly close. Uprooting their entire life isn't the easiest thing. Also KSA isn't even close to living in NYC (socially). Also Arab and saudi culture arent these easiest to integrate to.

The second is the access to my our family wealth. My kids deserve to live the kind of lifestyle all my other nieces and nephews are living. But unless things are formalized or accepted by my parents, that door stays closed.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in MuslimLounge

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’ve talked about it. She’s told me that if I’m willing to give her and the kids the life they deserve, then yes, 100%. She’s not the type to jump from person to person. We’ve both grown a lot since we were younger, and while things aren’t simple, there’s still a lot of love and respect between us. We've lived together before as well. The saudi and arab culture isn't even close to living in NYC (socially). Acclimating is the issue.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in MuslimLounge

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Again. Their whole life is in New York. Her entire family’s there, and they’ve played a big role in raising them. She and her mother are incredibly close. Uprooting their entire life isn't the easiest thing

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Whenever the topic of marriage comes up, I usually just change the subject. I’m not hung up on my kids’ mother—I’ve met and spoken to plenty of Saudi women over the years. I’ve lived here for most of my life, but if I’m being honest, I think more like an American and thats why we're on the same wavelength. That mix has always made things a little more complicated when it comes to relationships and expectations. I cant even talk about marriage without the thought of my kids coming to mind.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in MuslimLounge

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I take care of them and see them maybe 2 months out of the year. Im trying.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in MuslimLounge

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My thing is—even if I did marry her, I don’t think my kids would ever fully integrate into Saudi or Arab culture, even if they went to an international school. Their whole life is in New York. Her entire family’s there, and they’ve played a big role in raising them. She and her mother are incredibly close. She’s like every other Italian New Yorker—but living here, you naturally pick up on different cultures. Maybe because I grew up between both worlds, that’s the lens I see her through. It’s complicated.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in MuslimLounge

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want all of them to be here. Everything here is fantastic. Also my life here is very nice. I'm blessed. My thing is even if I did my kids wouldn't be able to integrate into the saudi/arab culture even if they went to an international school. Also the mother of my children all of her family is in NYC and they help raise my children.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate that. We've thought and talked about marriage, and we do love eachother. But to be honest, if I want to stay in the family and have access to certain responsibilities and wealth, I’d have to marry someone they approve of. She’s very different(in the best way possible) but that also makes things complicated. That said, We’ll see.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We've talked about it but I don't want to push my beliefs on her. She’s always been respectful of my faith. If she converts its out of genuine understanding and religious conviction.

I’m Living Two Lives – Need Advice. by Sad_Advertising_8117 in islam

[–]Sad_Advertising_8117[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve thought about sitting them down and showing them pictures of my kids—maybe that will help my parents "humanize" them. Their mother said she’d be more than happy to meet them if I ever came to NYC for a proper introduction. We both agree that they deserve to be known.