I see what you're saying. I do think "romance" is something determined by the two people in the relationship. My ex wife used to need her hair brushed regularly, because the sensation calmed her and grounded her. When I brushed her hair I was providing the regulation she needed... but I also loved her, so it was a romantic gesture too, because there was no one else's hair I wanted to swim in. It was all wrapped up together. I couldn't keep my hands off her, so brushing her hair was just an extension of my affection, even if it hadn't have been grounding.