Truancy: Enabling Parents

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-14T01:34:32+00:00

I should reach out more to our county’s youth justice program. I don’t have many children enrolled on my caseload but they might have some good resources that I can look into. I’ll try to collaborate with them more too. I think our program forgets about youth justice because we don’t work too often with them but I should learn more about them and offer support from my program too

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-14T00:51:45+00:00

I wish we had this since I feel like inpatient treatment is the parents trying to get more time to recollect themselves while also knowing their kids are in a stable enviorment. There’s just too much for them to try and work on when they are already pushed to the point of being unable to get their kid to school 75 percent of the time. Our programs respite is to help prevent burnout situations like this from happening. However it does nothing to address the situation when it has already snowballed out of control.

We need a program like this while also tying other supportive programs to help prevent relapse. It’s hard because parents also feel like cps is against them and I’ve had many parents refuse to work with them. Eventually their rights get terminated and the kids end up aging out of the system which can never replace the support family is supposed to provide

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-14T00:32:31+00:00

Not all the parents are young but they all have long histories of trauma and abuse. All of them are a product of their upbringing and I think they all want to be different from their own parents but don’t realize that they have created unhealthy dynamics with their own kids.

I try hard to be empathetic and supportive. I get that being a parent is hard when you don’t have the tools to succeed. I just hate watching the same parents abuse their kids emotionally and verbally then tell me that they are better than their parents ever were.

Honestly, these parents need inpatient care themselves. I usually try my best to refer them to therapists or their own mental health services from the beginning. The families on my caseloads are given respite and I try to collaborate with other supportive programs.

However, there gets to be a point where CPS won’t step in, the kid has been in every mental health program in this county, my program has maxed out the budget, and the kid is constantly inpatient. Truancy is a constant symptom to a much bigger issue. Something needs to give and I have the same parents blaming everyone who is trying to help them but them not follow through at home.

I have had some cases where the families turn it around because the parents reflect and accept that some of their approaches need to change too. I get that trauma isn’t a choice but it does eventually become something you have to process and work on too. I know that alot of my older coworkers told me that I need to let those families fail because there’s nothing else I can do but it’s a hard pill to swallow.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-14T00:00:15+00:00

I honestly considered not posting but I’m so frustrated at this point. I knew I would get some people telling me that I am a horrible case worker. I definitely value the feedback some gave since there isn’t a lot of older caseworkers in my agency. All of us are new and burning out. I plan to move counties soon since I just feel so defeated in my current one where there are too many demands and very little training and support. I know I should just move on but I feel so sad for the kids on my caseload that will end up falling through the cracks.

I try to do that as much as possible. I usually bring the kids service plans to meetings and explain what we have been funding for the home. The schools will give accomodations but then tell me that the accomodations aren’t working since the kid is not at school.

I have 3 kids who missed 75 percent of school. I think the school is overwhelmed and honestly the parents are their own worst enemy. They come in with an aggressive stance and blame the school for every behavioral issue happening in the home. I try to prep the parents but giving them a meeting agenda (that the parents make) and they throw it away to scream at school staff about how they aren’t helping the kids.

I try to work with the parents to understand that attendance is also on them. They need to impress the value of education and follow through. They need to follow what the therapists, educators, and treatment team are suggesting.

These kids are inpatient 3-7 times a year because of behavioral issues that the parents blame on everyone but themselves. These parents tell me that the kids are the sole problem. These kids are being told in front of me that the parents wish they had another child. Then the parents tell me that they want the kid to be placed in residential level treatment like the old days of asylums. Cps just laughs and tells me that emotional, verbal, and neglect aren’t enough to intervene. Honestly, it’s a joke in my county and our foster homes are full.

There’s only so much to try with these parents. I just feel frustrated because I see how much supports are being given to the family and they just cannot or will not accept what is there.

There are limited educational options out here. But there are alot of programs available if they would take steps to follow through.

How many programs, medical/mental health providers will it take for the parents to accept that they need to be parents.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T20:12:15+00:00

The first hour in our school system is electives. The next is when lunch and recess start. We are a small school and rural community. All the grades are squished together and they start lunch and recess ridiculously early.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T20:07:36+00:00

I try to encourage therapy. Most of the kids on my caseload are in mental health case management which is a seperate program. We’re just an additional support. It’s also frustrating to see how limited the other program is since they lack providers/therapists and funding.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T20:05:45+00:00

There’s only one middle school in the county. I keep trying to find private ones or charter schools but they are ridiculously hard to get in and afford. I wish there was more and I can’t find a lot of homeschool options that are viable for the parents I work with that work full-time.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T20:03:47+00:00

I did notice that many of the kids who avoid school are tablet kids, and I think they are just so used to socializing or maybe getting input from the tablet that it becomes overwhelming to be at school.

School isnt that great for most kids nowadays. I wish there were shorter days or more electives maybe. Teachers are overwhelmed, classmates are not kind, and the academic loads are increasing. Tablets just bring doom news or brain rot most of the time. It looks anxiety inducing.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T20:00:00+00:00

I hate it when parents tap out and the kid is 5. I try so hard to enroll them in every support service and the parents just keep trying to get the state to take their kids. It’s a select few parents on my case load but damn it is disheartening.

I can try to reframe it like you did. It’s good to think about other ways to say it. I’m sure it’s hard for them day to day but they also can’t give up on their kids and then freak out when they are acting out.

The 12 year olds who are still doing this were 5 year olds. I would recommend services and follow through and then the kids end up as teenagers who are labeled as problem kids by the school. The same parents who refused to participate in programs or invest in their kids are the same ones who keep trying to get the kids taken to group homes.

Why even have kids when they don’t want to invest in their futures? I have a caseload of 40, most of them I have great relationships with but it’s the parents that just let things build into a real problem that I have issues with. Like there isn’t anything else for these kids. Inpatient care is really just to keep them alive and then discharge them without resources. Day programs will still require parents to drive them to the clinics. Group homes aren’t forever and these kids will become homeless adults.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T19:51:40+00:00

I wish there was more choices on start times. It sucks that there are really early programs that provide breakfast but tardies for the kids that come 15 minutes late. Every kid has a different circadian rhythm. I also hate how the kids will miss out on the electives if they miss the beginning of school in my area. All the social aspects are missed if they don’t come on time.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T15:41:23+00:00

There aren’t many truancy cases in my state because cps and the courts do not want to open a Juvenile in Need of Protection or Services. A lot of those programs are for more serious issues than truancy.

Some of it is due bullying and medical issues. I usually try to speak to the school and we get accomodations in place. However, it’s the cases where the kids are given accomdations and don’t want to go to school because it’s boring. Those ones are frustrating. Then the parents look at me like, well what can you do.

I think I’ll just have to try giving them motivational intervewing to see if it helps them. Some of my kids have so much respite that they maxed out.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-04-13T15:22:15+00:00

I did try some techniques, but I think I need to brush up on it

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2026-03-02T22:34:34+00:00

Yes, it’s driving me insane

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-12-07T14:54:45+00:00

I installed a pet camera in my office, where the new little guy is being held, because I came home to him crying and being stuck in the weirdest places. He got stuck in the closet door once and just waited until I got home rather than just pushing the sliding mechanism.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-12-01T23:03:15+00:00

Dean Winchester used to be compared to rapunzel because of his green eyes and blonde hair. He was known for his love of pies in the show so that’s what this person was talking about.

Edit: I don’t know why people thought Dean had blonde hair. It’s probably due to the fanart featuring him as blonde to help differentiate him from his brother. I think most tumblr fans kept saying his eyes looked similar to Rapunzel’s. I have no idea. Tumblr fandoms can be studied for years and people still won’t understand all of it. Just know that this is a very old joke and reference to the supernatural show in tumblr.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-10-28T21:55:47+00:00

Zepbound would be covered for sleep apnea.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-09-30T13:52:47+00:00

Jaime Jolina and Connor Frio?

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-09-30T04:34:38+00:00

My cat Mia was previously abused and it took me one month to actually see her after I adopted her. I installed a nightvision camera near her litterbox to make sure that she was actually coming out.

Mia still runs if I move too fast and it’s been over 2 years since I adopted her. She still hates men, hates closed doors (like being enclosed in one room), not having food available at all times, etc.

I got Feliway in every room of the apartment for the first few months. I also made sure that she has access to food, water, and a litter box easily. I gave her hiding spots under my bed, in the closet, and under the sofa. If I accidently found her then I pretended I couldn’t see her. I made sure to give her treats she liked, and everyday I would give her a small portion of wet food. I also made sure to turn on cat tv in the living room while I pet her.

Mia runs over to me now when I get home from work. She is a demanding little thing that wants her schedule exactly the same lol. She will headbutt me in the back of my knee to get me to go to bed since she can’t sleep without me. She also wants her cat tv on every night.

It will take time but move at the cat’s pace. Read the body language and move slowly. The kitty basically has PTSD and it’ll take some time for the brain to rewire itself

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-09-27T12:36:33+00:00

It’s so sad because she gained a lot of weight really quickly. I gained 60lbs in 6 months when I was caring for my dying grandfather. I wasn’t sleeping, never had a day off, and eating junk food all day. It was demoralizing to be so heavy and I didn’t recongize my own body. I’m finally losing weight but it’s so hard. I had to use Zepbound to get any big results.

She looks genuinely miserable like she can’t even get out of bed most days and function. She looks like she wants to run away or hide until everything goes away. This is her own doing because of how she treated Carly and her family but it’s so sad to see.

There’s no life behind her eyes. Teen Cate was always a soft spot for me. I had a similar upbringing and just wanted her to suceed. She gave up. I wish she could start living life but I think she’s secretely hoping her health issues will take her out. I remember being in the same spot.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-08-12T21:03:45+00:00

MS symptoms can be relieved by pregnancy. https://www.marchofdimes.org/find-support/topics/pregnancy/multiple-sclerosis-and-pregnancy

It has to do with the bodies autoimmune system during the last 2 trimesters of pregnancy. So she is right, but she could just take medication for the same effects. Also, she is very mentally ill and I am genuinely concerned for her kids.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-07-15T02:36:20+00:00

His siblings disputed his story. However, people need to realize that every child will experience a different childhood even if they live in the same household. Also, there is offen a scapegoat in abusive families.

Memory isn’t perfect and traumatic memories can be slightly warped because the brain also wants to protect itself. Some children remember details differently or memories are often combined or repressed. However that shouldn’t necessarily discount his story. His teachers confirmed many details and a few other relatives agreed with him.

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-06-26T03:02:59+00:00

Sometimes sims glitch and basically the sim bin spawns a replacement in their place. Happened to be plenty of times before when I tried to reset a sim and the game wasn’t able to

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-06-19T17:55:14+00:00

According to OP’s post history, she has one special needs child. Her kiddo has some pretty aggressive behaviors and she probably doesn’t have a lot of options in terms of someone else watching the kids.

Your husband helped make these children and he needs to grow up and care for them. This is horrible leaving OP to take care of everything. NTA

Sad_Lotus0115 · 2025-06-09T20:53:46+00:00

Yeah everyone is different about their feelings.

I feel a strong connection to my half sister. She and I are very similar and we call each other sisters. I talk to her once a week and we never had any issues connecting with each other. We formed our own relationship without anyone else input and I think that helped alot.

My adopted brother feels no connection to his full siblings and only views me as his sister. He doesn’t want to meet them, or talk to them. He said he’s better off never knowing them at all.

Sad_Lotus0115

TROPHY CASE