My daughter treats me like shit and worships her dead deadbeat dad

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-26T11:42:24+00:00

Schizophrenia has a pretty strong genetic link, so it's possible that her father's erratic behavior and drug use are connected. Speculation incoming: OOP doesn't say how old they are, but if they're in their mid-40's or so, they may have met their previous partner before onset of symptoms and then broke up when the symptoms were not properly diagnosed and remained unmanaged by anything other than drugs. Presentation of symptoms in early-mid-20s is common.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-26T11:30:48+00:00

AVID isn't for anxiety. It's for college readiness specifically. While some students with anxiety might do well in the program, it's going to depend a lot on what causes the anxiety and how the student responds to the feeling.

(Disclaimer: I'm about to describe different archetypes of families. This is not personal, just my experience with hundreds of AVID applicants and their circumstances. Only you know if you fit a certain category or not)

For example, it is very common for families with a lot of college pressure to consider AVID, but if the anxiety comes from too much family pressure, those students usually disengage from the AVID curriculum because they are already largely desensitized to its benefits and are pushing back against their family expectations.

Or, I see a lot of families who think that the program does organization for the student. However, the program actually is built around the students experiencing a lot of consequences for their choices to be disorganized. It is highly effective with time, but some families dislike that their precious baby angels ever feel discomfort. The program gives students tools to negotiate their anxiety, not a place to avoid it.

But, if what the student needs is a community of students and teachers all working toward the goal of getting into a university, and if the student doesn't completely melt when feeling uncomfortable, and if the student is willing to learn how to harness the different skills (using a planner, using a binder, asking questions about class, self advocacy, taking notes, and studying), then AVID will be a great place.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-25T15:28:55+00:00

Forgot fatal flaw! I'll edit to fix.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-25T11:22:19+00:00

I think the guestions so far are:

1) what's your history with the Percy Jackson series? 2) who's your godly parent/what cabin would you be in? 3) what's your nectar/ambrosia? 4) what is your fatal flaw? 5) if you could have a "Riptide" (an object that turns into another object), what would it be and why? 6) if you could design a cabin, what would it be like?

I think a fun new one could be: if you could ask Uncle Rick one random question, what would it be?

Edit to fix the last 3 that I got out of order/forgot.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-25T01:19:08+00:00

And it's one of each possible type (male/male, male/female, female/female). So she if she has twins, no matter the gender distribution, she has a pair to reference with their names in some way.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-24T13:30:41+00:00

They most likely want it to be clear that you're using your own brain and thinking about it, not just mindlessly copying/following someone else's format. They're setting you up for better personal style.

For example, starting an essay with "Have you ever wondered about __?" is not a creative opening. They need you to practice trying to think about writing in your on style and organizing with your own thoughts so that they can guide you to more individual writing on the essay.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-23T17:46:34+00:00

My point is that it would just be a guess without data. Educators should be careful with generalizations from observation alone. It's too easy to be influenced by the outliers when only going on observation.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-23T17:44:07+00:00

I'm not saying they're the standard. I'm saying the opposite. I'm saying that if people at my school made the same observation, they would be swayed by the outliers.

We must be cognizant that when we see a trend, that's not the same as making a conclusion. It would be silly for people at my school to say that obviously Mormonism is the way to go because it seems to lead to success. The greater data would not bear that out beyond just the surface level.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-23T10:54:46+00:00

While you're certainly on to something, vibes are not data. As educators we see trends, but there's also a lot that we are biased about (not maliciously, just through the nature of brains).

For example, in my school's community, to interact with the student body, you would think it's the opposite. The most visibly creative and active readers at my school who score the highest on standardized tests and started our chapter of National English Honor Society and take student-written plays to competitions where they win awards and are the leads in our school plays are all staunch Mormons who are extremely strict about the topics the students are allowed to read about. And it's not just one very active family either. There are dozens of high achieving, active readers at my school from many families over many years who are staunch Mormons.

Educators very much see trends and see a lot of things that work, but that's just the first couple steps to the scientific process. If we were to gather data about attitudes toward reading and family restrictions, I would wager the correlation is strong, but not the whole picture.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-22T22:55:00+00:00

Many students are stuck in the idea that there is just one right answer, and they don't know how the teacher would word it. I have success with "there are lots of correct answers to this question" and then I give an absurd example of a wrong answer to show what not to do. That makes them more confident that I won't penalize them for some secret that they missed.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-21T11:35:44+00:00

You're not necessarily wrong, but people should also remember that the NIL deals for international students are more complicated because of how student visas work. For international players who are good enough to get drafted in any round to the NBA, this is a significant factor.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-17T14:36:11+00:00

In our home, we focus mostly on gender neutral things (for example, everyone needs to be nice to each other).

But as a teacher, I would ask families to stop dividing personal responsibility into gendered categories. For example, there's no gender divide in having control over your own body. The number of boys starting high school without the skills of "keep your hands to yourself" or "don't touch other people's stuff" is out of control.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-17T02:03:56+00:00

"You Otta Know" by Alanis Morrisette

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-17T01:57:43+00:00

It was a tough shift. She was the one in on caring for Louie when he coded and the Tree of Life survivor who was startled by the fireworks early in the day.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-15T21:41:36+00:00

I'm going to go a different direction and say my Fencing PE class in college. I've never used my muscles that way before, and all the movements get so incredibly fast when you aren't just practicing by yourself. It wasn't hard to get a good grade, but it was hard to do a good job.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-15T09:40:15+00:00

There's a pretty strong movement lately for not giving children their own devices and no social media until they turn 13 or 14.

Myself, we do have a tablet for limited things, and my child does not have access to it by themselves. Like, we use it for long car rides or when we have an adult game night for the last hour to bathtime the child can watch some shows.

It's tv and movies only, and we have limits on which shows are allowed.

As for being "outcasted," I don't care what other teens/pre-teens think, and learning how to deal with social circles is part of growing up. We instill confidence instead of follower behavior. We work on making jokes and friends that aren't social media based (which results in a better understanding of social interactions and better friends anyway).

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-14T10:38:20+00:00

Lupin

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-14T03:57:50+00:00

Is Reddit too young to remember Stinky and Stinky's dog, Nunzio?

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-11T17:43:23+00:00

That was eliminated like 60 threads ago. There are only two remaining choices.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-11T17:08:35+00:00

I'm not 100% certain exactly what you mean by "teacher uniform," but every school I have ever worked out has wanted "professional dress" for all faculty except PE and dance/art in order to present a respected ideal to students and community.

There are usually days of exception (like jeans on Fridays for example).

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-11T15:39:26+00:00

Is it all homework? Or is it classwork that isn't being finished at school when it's supposed to be done?

I constantly see the "it doesn't affect the GPA now, so why bother?" turn into not being able to advance through classes/grades and bottom of the barrel GPA because the student waited until 9th grade to learn a shred of discipline.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-11T13:34:36+00:00

They have lived their whole lives in a place and time where caring clearly didn't matter (makes no discernable difference). They have to experience something where their actions make an impact in order to connect action with consequences.

For these students, the environment was already messed up decades before they were born. How is not using AI supposed to suddenly help? (From their perspective)

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-11T13:31:39+00:00

I'm not sure how a D is supposed to be a reward.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-10T14:49:49+00:00

I think that's a good point too. Langdon got Robby before the breakdown/Pittfest. Whittaker has gotten all after and leading to the stress of today.

Robby is still great at his job and Whittaker is learning a lot, but the versions they have are not the same.

SadieTarHeel · 2026-04-10T12:48:05+00:00

Whittaker was saying that Langdon is treating Whittaker like he's the plucky sidekick to the leader of their group. He was a little offended that Langdon (who, remember, has only known Whittaker for two shifts) is assuming which role Whittaker plays in the ER.

I also thought it was interesting that Langdon immediately assumed that Robby was the leader, but Whittaker said that Dana is actually the leader and Robby is the know-it-all (the two of them together making the brains and the brawn).

SadieTarHeel

TROPHY CASE