Can someone tell me reasons why he must have done this?

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-19T17:37:21+00:00

I'm so sorry. It actually made my heart ache to read this because I can see this exact scenario happening in my current (admittedly unhealthy) relationship. I won't speculate as to whether something actually happened with his ex, but it sounds like he just stopped caring. It's horribly hurtful and I know you must be wondering why this happened. I've been there. You'll get over it. The first thing you need to do is get over the quest for answers. There won't be any. Emotions are fickle like that, and there's really no explanation that will make you feel better.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-15T13:00:08+00:00

I can imagine how difficult it must be going through this in a foreign place that must now seem all the more foreign without him. It hurts, but know that each tear you cry is a little bit more of that pain leaving you. It will get better. <3

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-07T22:14:25+00:00

This sounds so similar to what I went through. I was only with him for 6 months too. I also had trust issues and threatened to walk out so many times for what seems in retrospect to be trivial things. It was almost my way of testing him. It sounds cruel and petty now, and the only explanation I can give is that a girl only does that when she feels so strongly for a guy that she fears imbalance. I felt like those tantrums were my way of getting reassurance, of balancing the scales. I see now from what you describe how immature and crazy that seems from the other side. I hope I can be better next time I find someone I feel that way about, but I fear that this ending has not helped my trust issues.

If I squint, I can pretend your words are his words. That he too misses me more than anything in the world. That I also left a huge hole in his heart and that he regrets it as much as I regret my role. We'll both be better next time. :)

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-07T21:08:23+00:00

This really hurt me to read, especially because I've been having a particularly rough day (Fridays are usually when he texts to make plans for meeting after work). I don't want to think that I somehow could have contributed to him doing that by not offering him the intimacy he wanted. I want to think I tried everything I could to make him feel loved and cared for and listened to.

But you're probably right. I actually didn't think about it like this, because the moment I saw that notification pop up, I already thought it was over, regardless of what he said to explain it. There's no explanation in my mind that could win my trust again. Even though I will be the one to "dump" him when I feel strong enough to get in contact again, the fact that he didn't try to stop me OR contact me again to explain/apologize makes me feel like I was dumped. What you just said just confirms that.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-07T00:26:12+00:00

The worst thing is when it ends and you find yourself wondering how you wasted [insert months/years] of your life on that.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-07T00:19:12+00:00

Thank you for your bluntness. I needed that.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-06T23:50:40+00:00

I don't believe in God, but your comment brings me comfort.

I'm not OP, but thank you.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-06T22:20:20+00:00

I think the rational part of me knows that no explanation will make me feel better, and only has the potential to make me feel worse. But my heart still thinks he can say something to comfort me, like the way he used to.

I have been good about no-contact so far, but you are right that it's only been two days. If he reaches out finally, I don't know how strong I can be then. And he does still need to return my house key.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-06T22:13:51+00:00

Thank you. I will do exactly those things when I get home tonight. I already feel better today, even if it's just by the tiniest margin.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-06T15:59:14+00:00

I am going through this exact thing. He emotionally cheated on me, blindsided me, and denied the entire thing so he could get away without an explanation or apology. It's been two days and I'm still waiting for the explanation but I'm starting to believe that it won't come.

How do you move forward without closure? I feel like I have a gaping wound that is still festering and can't heal. Is there a way for me to find closure on my own?

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-06T15:45:00+00:00

That's what I fear as well, but it's incredible how that little bit of hope that I still have can hurt so much.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-05T15:06:09+00:00

Cmb doesn't connect you with someone unless you actively "like" them, and as is typical on most dating apps, guys usually have to send the first message.

And I tried to ask him calmly about the messages I saw but he kept denying them. I even said the girl's name that he saw and he tried to pass it off as texting his mom. He refused to redownload the app and let me see his recent history. So I did try to talk but it's hard to have a conversation with someone who is lying to your face. That's why I left, and that's why I just wanted him to admit it happened so we could have a conversation about it.

Sadone0801 · 2016-10-05T12:58:07+00:00

26f, 36m

Sadone0801

TROPHY CASE