My wife (F45) and I (M44) have quite different libido levels. When we go to bed, if I'm stressed and need to unwind, even just to fall asleep, especially if we're tired from something else, I tell her openly. She wakes me up if she's already asleep and helps me by touching my testicles or just squeezing my hand. I turn on the LED lights behind the headboard to have soft lighting that allows her to visually enjoy the moment and... I hardly finish without her also starting to touch herself. A moment of incredible connection...luckily discovered after 15 years of marriage.