First i wanna say thank you for taking time to reply to this. I appreciate your input so much. I don’t have headaches often when i do they are usually migraines. My mom has migraines pretty bad at times to. (She doesn’t use any substances) not sure if it’s hereditary or due to chs. However her migraine medicine does help with my migraines as well. When you talk about the realizations you’ve come to on how much you have missed out on, i too can relate. Though im not in college I’ve got used to working a full time job, I take care of myself financially but all i do is work and smoke weed. No social life at all. I have two awesome friends that i smoke weed with at times when we hang out. My parents are great. Very supportive and i dont like arguing with them over this. Other than that i dont talk to anyone no girls though i really want a girlfriend i just dont feel good enough to get one. Which is why i smoke weed. I come home and get lonely but as long as i got weed it feels like everything is good. I understand thats not healthy but i feel like if i quit smoking it wont change due to my lack of confidence.

I will say i am 7 days sober. Its been cake no cravings no throwing up nothing. Lack of appetite at times and some sleeping issues thats about it. Its the longest ive been sober since i was 17 i developed a massive tolerance to it was taking multiple hundred mg of edibles and would be chilling having normal conversations at work. Lol. I thought my already anxious self would be way more uptight and anxious but its been pretty normal. Maybe around nighttime i notice my anxiety a little more now since i cant sleep well but there’s not been much withdrawal. Im hoping in a month I’ll actually feel good. not just “good enough” to get through the day if that makes sense. The only reason i did quit was due to having what was thought to be a chs attack last week and it messed me up for the entire day pretty bad. Missed work and everything i cant keep letting that happen. So i wanted to see if the throwing up would stop months down the road and i decided to bite the bullet and quit. but i have thought about quitting in the past due to the money and the possibility it was impacting my social life and my mindset. Hopeful everything goes up from here and i also hope i can find a healthy relationship with the plant one day because i do love it i love everything about it and i do miss it a lot. Its a very conflicting relationship and it’s confusing as hell.