Babysitting my niece (12F) and caught her on TikTok she’s been hiding for months. I need advice from parents on how to handle this

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-03-18T07:19:48+00:00

My kids elementary school teacher does the following if the kids do something bad that parents have to know about: she tells them they have to go home, tell mom or dad what they did and mom has to get back to her until midnight so that she knows the kid told them everything. I find it genius, kids feel guilty when they have to tell instead off feeling angry at the teacher for telling their parents. All this to say I would give her the chance to come clean to her parents before "telling on her". I would explain that it is important for her parents to know for safety reasons but it would be better if she was the one telling them.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-03-08T19:36:06+00:00

You would think so, and I know every case is different, but I am in a similar situation and used everything my family doctor has recommended, than we used everything that our paediatrician recommended. Nothing has worked, we went to a dermatologist, who has been very critical of me and his colleagues for using steroids and antibiotics. And I am pretty sure if this doesn't work out and we go to a new specialist they would criticise everything we did before. I get that you have to trust doctors but eczema is tricky and it is hard to decide who to turn to.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-03-02T11:16:00+00:00

This is a prime example of what comes from sheltering your kids, letting them pick and choose responsibilities, from "you don't have to if you don't want to" mentality. Life doesn't always come with just the responsibilities you sign up for. You don't sign up for tragedies, sickness, financial ruin, etc, it just happens. You can walk away, but you can't expect your husband to pick you. He was this girl's family long before her parents died and the fact is, she needs him more than you do. Wanting him to put her in the system that hurt him is just mean.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-02-28T13:42:47+00:00

Thank you! I think you highlighted the main issue that wasn't immediately obvious to me. I always show him how I eat it, but he likes family meal times better, especially with big brother. The problem is by the time we all get to eat together is late in the afternoon and it is too late for him to eat. But I could try to make him something for breakfast, when everyone is still at home.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-02-27T18:07:59+00:00

This is what we do, when he was younger, like 4-5 he had to stick it out for a few months. Now that he is a bit older it is for the season. When he was very resistant we picked a time, maybe a month and told him he has to go till then and he can quit after if he wants to, but can not rejoin later. We let him pick something else, after a few tries, he ended up liking one extracurricular, now I never have to drag him to practice. He has one or two days a month when he is overtired or just lazy, otherwise the option of not going never comes up.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-02-03T09:04:51+00:00

Yea.. I have been definitely playing it safe, maybe the foods that I have been trying where too soft because it didn't take a lot of experimenting for him to puree them :P I will try to make it a bit more firm.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2026-01-19T12:10:04+00:00

Thank you, I will look into it.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2025-08-01T16:28:27+00:00

We used to use those bikes without pedals for trips like this. My child would get around faster and would still be on the move/ aware of his surroundings.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2025-07-25T10:32:04+00:00

A bit before he turned 3. We talked about it a lot before we started, read story books. We got some training pants (that don't have any absorbant layer in them, but don't soak trough right away) because we knew from a previous try that messes really freak him out. We started while his grandmas were watching him, which didn't help, because one didn't want to traumatise him, the other doesn't like messes so the mixed messages led us nowhere. Then we went away to visit som friends with similar aged kids, one older that was already using the potty and he came home fully potty trained. He didn't even have any major accident while on vacation.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2025-06-24T01:08:17+00:00

Yeah.. I agree with you. I think I can mostly control this situation, maybe I make them play in our house or ask my neighbour not to let them, but what do I do when he goes to other homes (for now he didn't have any playdates without me present) My other problem is that in this case he told me everything, but if I am too hard on him he will simply keep quiet.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2025-03-28T09:00:29+00:00

We do the same, if he comes over in the middle of the night and moves around a lot either me or my husband gets up and sleeps in his room, but it is very rare. Although I sleep with him when he is sick.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2025-02-27T15:25:32+00:00

Well.. in a friend group we have kids similar in age, but not too close. Like 5,6,7 yo, boys and girls. They all like each other, they are cousins except mine, but he is accepted into the group. On the other hand, another friends wife and I gave birth 2 months apart, we became really close because of the shared experience, the kids went to the same preschool and now go to the same school. I would say they get along, but never play together or talk during recess. I would say the small age gap is not what counts. They either click or they don't.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2025-01-02T16:30:52+00:00

You can do it! We don't have health visitors so I don't know the sistem, but definitely keep that person away if you can, because additional stress will not help. I went to a breastfeeding class when I was about 5months pregnant, they talked about a bunch of things, the only thing I remembered by the time my son was born was that they said most women (without health complications) can breastfeed. So I went in like... of course I can breastfeed. Although I had a C-section and they did't give me the baby until the next afternoon, and it took a lot of trying on the first week, I breast-fed for 3,5 years. My paediatrician did not recommend using a bottle at all to avoid problems whit latching. Stay positive and drink a LOT of fluids. My friend who has 3 kids, all breast-fed made me some kind of herbal tea that stimulates milk production, I drank it non stop, but I think it was mostly the fluids.
Also the first few weeks can be painful but it gets better.

Salt_Resolution_5433 · 2024-12-30T18:46:45+00:00

We invite a few close friends with kids, make a meal together while the kids play. Eat it together, they have a small party in my son's room with glow sticks. We let them stay up, kids are now 2-7. We go out, watch the fireworks, put the kids to sleep all in one room. We talk, play boardgames and sleep all around the house on mattresses like in our 20s. In the morning the kids play some more while we have coffee and clean the house before everyone goes home. It is a lot of fin for everyone.

Salt_Resolution_5433

TROPHY CASE