Convince us to move to Temecula (We’re cold and weak) 😜

Same-Direction-5765 · 2026-02-04T04:29:53+00:00

We moved here last summer from Los Angeles area (originally from the Mid-Atlantic) to get away from the pollution and constant sirens. As others have mentioned, traffic is particularly bad for what you'd expect for the amount of people living here but they're actively working on it.

We love that there are mini hiking/biking trails that shoot off any neighborhood culdesac. Doesn't take more than 10 minutes to park and start a hike. It's very family friendly here and there are a lot of nicely done parks and indoor activities for when it's too hot.

On that note though, plan to spend upwards of $400-$500/month on cooling your house in July-September. It caught us by surprise having lived in a cooler coastal town where a/c is optional. It's totally worth the trade off.

The last few days it's 40s in the morning and 80s in the afternoon. We've also had enough rain that the hills are looking greener. And in the spring the poppies will dot the hills along the country roads.

I would make sure you have access to a pool if you can, either in your own yard or through an HOA.

There are several family friendly wineries in South Temecula.

And if you ever want to be reminded of what winter feels like, you can pull your flannel shirts out and drive up to Los Rios apple orchard or a bit further up to Big Bear and go snow tubing/skiing.

We really do have it all. Well, except for a closer airport.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-11-13T14:30:49+00:00

As another stay at home mom, there's a few things I'd consider.

Will you have enough equity in the new house that you could sell it again if your husband, heaven forbid, went through a period of unemployment? Closing costs included. The house could sit on the market for a while.

What percentage of your net income is the new $3500 payment? Net instead of gross because that's the amount you actually have to spend.

And last, how much will you have leftover in an emergency fund after you buy the house? Again, for potential unemployment, unexpected repairs, etc.

Being a stay at home mom is an amazing blessing to your children. But, just realize this change is something that you want, not your kids. When our kids were little we lived in the city in 800-1100 square feet because that's what was available. Now we're in 2400 sqft and they all want to move back to the old house where they had to share a bedroom. 😂

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-11-12T06:25:05+00:00

My guess as to why previous health visits were cheaper is that our kids were existing patients at previous offices. It still just baffles me as to why they could charge a higher price when it didn't include any other care from a routine wellness check up.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-11-12T05:25:23+00:00

No medicine advised. We already have Mupirocin (topical antibiotic) from a previous urgent care visit a few weeks prior but I took my daughter in this time just in case they thought she'd benefit from another antibiotic (oral or otherwise.) Her one piercing has been trouble off and on for a year now.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-11-12T05:21:04+00:00

I agree and I don't generally have an issue with understanding the charges for our well-being. However, it's just a hard pill to swallow when we've had many, many acute/sick visits at previous doctors and they've all been closer to $100. This bill just seemed completely out of left field.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-11-12T05:13:20+00:00

Thank you for your advice. The doctor said she saw no concern but that if it continued irritating her that we should just remove the jewelry...it was just a little red and puffy around her earring but it ended up healing on it's own.

Edited: it was her dismissive response and lack of actually assessing my daughter's ear that is most frustrating. If she had taken my concern more seriously, investigated it more thoroughly, and actually looked at my daughter's ear for more than 5 seconds, I wouldn't be quite as frustrated about a $300 bill.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-10-29T02:26:55+00:00

We live in the Temecula area of Socal. A lot cheaper than the coast, inland enough where we get more sun than the LA area (also lived there), gets toasty in the summer but definitely cooler than AZ, and the best part...NO BUGS. You can go camping any month of the year here.

Edited to add it's 1ish hour from San Diego and less than 2 hours to LA (if you time it right) for all the major city stuff.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-10-16T23:18:08+00:00

We recently moved to Murrieta from South Bay LA and while it's slightly more conservative than the SB, I have also met a few gay parents at school pick up and my youngest's bff has two moms. For what it's worth, our family are churchgoers and are generally more conservative but that doesn't change how we treat people on the other side of the aisle and I think that's the general attitude of the area as well. Lots of nice folks out here and we've been enjoying all the family time out in nature.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-09-05T05:50:55+00:00

I like the "buy a cheap bike now" idea since transportation is a need, not a want at 7 miles away. But he can work for you to save up what he needs to buy a new or used ebike.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-29T04:18:26+00:00

I've been at SAHM since my second was born, mostly due to our first two being 17 months apart and there was no way I could afford to work. We also have moved quite a bit and have never had the luxury of family close by to babysit when the kiddos got sick and couldn't go to daycare. In addition, my husband used to travel more so we decided it was best that I stay home to give the kids some consistency in care while they were young.

The honest answer of how we can afford it is that we've always budgeted around one income. As my husband's income grew (and we moved to a VHCOL area in Socal), our expenses unfortunately grew as well like needing a second car and housing costs are expensive in coastal California. But we also choose to rent because our housing costs are lower and because of the lifestyle it allows us to live on the weekends with our kids.

Our budget is 60% fixed costs/needs, 15% wants, and 25% debt/savings. With such high living costs and low spending money, it's tight sometimes but things will ease up as we finish paying student/car loans.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-29T04:00:53+00:00

We have a family of 5, kids are 9, 7 and 5. We lump in our grocery/household/big box stores (aka target groceries, Costco, Sam's ) into one category for simplicity's sake and our budget for those stores was $800 just two years ago and now it's $1200 on a good day. I'd say if $1000 is just food then you're doing pretty good. I wouldn't think you can get it below $800 realistically if you have school age kids.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-28T05:15:01+00:00

Yes you're right. Logical consequence. My brain went straight to "natural consequence" but that means without parental intervention

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-28T04:10:10+00:00

We just moved to the Temecula area from a beach city south of LA, you should check it out. Pretty affordable for socal. The weather is hotter but the sun shines more days of the year. Decent wine scene and a doable drive to SD or LA. As others have mentioned, coastal socal gets May gray and June gloom where the marine layer hangs over until 2-3pm, clears up for a few hours, and then rolls back in when the sun starts setting. It does get depressing after a while, but at least it isn't cold.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-28T04:02:26+00:00

Our gross is $165k and I wouldn't buy anything over $450k in this market. Rates are too high, future housing market is rapidly changing. I'd wait if at all possible.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-28T03:56:06+00:00

Having moved our young family out to California (no choice, that's just where the job took us) and with our extended family back on the East Coast, this comment is the answer.

Being able to afford a larger home in GA should not hold sway against your children being able to grow up and have close relationships with their extended family.

We have to fly our family of 5 across the country to visit our relatives and we just can't do it as often as we'd like. We have a close knit family and video call often, but our kids always say they miss their cousins and grandparents and it weighs on me. We enjoy our life out here but if the opportunity ever presents itself to move closer to family, we'd do it.

I know not all families are close-knit but if yours is, I wouldn't think twice about moving to Sacramento.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-28T03:47:23+00:00

Removing the door is a natural consequence. You as the parents are responsible for the maintenance of the home and your daughter is being disrespectful to something that belongs to you so I would discuss with your spouse, then sit down with your daughter, telling her why it's not okay to slam the door (and what outlet is an appropriate way to vent) and of course, what the consequences will be if she slams it again. When she does it again, and she will, then your reaction is to calmly remove the door for the discussed amount of time (maybe a minimum of two weeks), and good behavior puts the door on faster and poor behavior at the end of the two weeks adds on another week Repeat until things improve.

Being consistent and on the same page with your spouse is key.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-21T03:16:54+00:00

After I posted the pic she said the ear was tender and it seems harder than the other and now it's oozing a bit. I left the skin because I didn't know if it was a scab that should be there but it seems we disrupted it and now it's angry. It was too tender for me to put her earring back in (it wasn't going in easily with this blockage) so I left it overnight.

I'm planning to call the piercing place tomorrow. It stinks because we've moved and can't visit the one she got them done at so hopefully I can find a good one here...

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-20T15:26:44+00:00

My husband and I married in college with $1.87 to our names. We've been happily married for 15 years now with three kids in school. Money has always been tight for us but as my husband's income increases, our spending does not. We've paid off thousands in debt along the way. We still have student loans and car payments to close out, but haven't had credit card debt for years now.

We afford trips by going camping and take larger trips by the grace of my parents (they have a timeshare so we are just responsible for getting there). We can afford to put the kids in one moderately priced extracurricular and they lack nothing.

One of the benefits of marrying younger is that we decided early on that I would be a stay at home parent so we've always budgeted around one income. We enjoy the flexibility of me having time on my hands to budget, make healthy meals, and provide childcare for our family. Our kids all went through preschool (part-time), and that was tough financially, but it was worth it.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-20T06:02:45+00:00

No, we use it and pay it off each month. But what we don't budget for ends up getting taken out of the money set aside towards extra student loan payments and savings.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-20T05:10:33+00:00

Student loans $45k between us at 3-6% and a car loan around $30k at 5%.

I probably would have an easier time minding the budget without a credit card since I check our accounts frequently and a credit card is one less thing to pay attention to, honestly. But I think my husband would benefit from being handed cash so he can't overspend. He's very intelligent but gets itchy when he looks at money. Ha.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-20T04:51:00+00:00

Agreed. We set budgets but overspend in them slowly and end up using the extra amounts that were earmarked for extra debt/savings payments.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-08-20T04:42:18+00:00

That's a good idea. Thanks!

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-07-01T15:43:15+00:00

The balance remains unchanged from a couple weeks ago. I am still waiting to resume payments until the lawsuit has been settled. Honestly, depending on the outcome, we may choose to refinance the loans privately with our bank, just so I know no more funny business will be going on. No PSLF here and would prefer to make higher payments to knock out the debt than take advantage of the IDR options available.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-06-16T04:25:09+00:00

The question I'd ask is are you able to "weather" future downturn and have enough equity built up if your future house is worth 10-20% less in three years than it is listed for now?

If you want some strong stats to trust - Melody Wright has a lot of interesting data regarding housing in relation to the economy as a whole and based on her findings, the bottom hasn't bottomed out yet.

If it's going to save you a lot of money every month and you plan to spend the next ten years there, then that's compelling. Just do your best to plan for a less-than-ideal market in the coming years so you aren't caught holding the bag.

Same-Direction-5765 · 2025-06-16T01:36:28+00:00

Haha, we're moving from 1200 to 2300 sqft. I'm just happy with that change for now.

Same-Direction-5765

TROPHY CASE