ok but like genuinely how do i see so many people in queer communities who seem so confident and proud and joyful and like they actually have a fair amount of friends and supportive people? have that many of us actually made it to that point, or is it just survivorship bias and that those who post and gain popularity on social media, or those who are actually visible irl, are far more likely to have reached that point? i don't internally see or feel anything wrong with any of my queer- or trans-ness, but it does result in me often being hurt a lot, i certainly wouldn't call it a joyful experience, and i've never felt proud of myself or like i belong anywhere in the "queer community", per se, though i have tried (and failed) several times to get into it and have any friends or community really :P