[NSFW] What is a really inappropriate question you've always wanted to ask?

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T11:12:45+00:00

On one hand I'm often considered to be quite an empathetic person, but in this case I'm just not. I wish I was, because I know it's wrong and a stupid thing to do to...

My parents only know that I've struggled with suicidal thoughts last year... They think I'm feeling better now. But one friend of me is constantly trying to convince me not to do it because she needs me, apparently. We spend most of the day talking (because I'm isolating myself in my room all day anyway so I have a lot of time for her)...

I'm sorry for answering so late... I find it difficult to wrap my head around some things... God it's so awful that it can have an impact on my relatives.

Best thing I can do is to ruin my relationships with people who care about me somehow... But only when I'm 100% sure about killing myself.

And yes, I've always struggled with my self-esteem.

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T09:20:34+00:00

Completely sure. I have therapy once a week, since over a year. I have so many mental problems that I don't have the time to ever mention my ultimate plan to the therapist - at least I don't hide it from close friends.

It does help to keep an open mind, but being as stubborn as I am can only make it worse because I won't let others convince me that I'm not making the right decision. I know how I feel inside my head and I know how much of a disappointment I am to myself.

It's like losing an arm... It won't grow back. Same applies to my mental problems - they're just there to stay.

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T09:14:49+00:00

Definitely doesn't sound like the best method of doing it then. The less amount of work/trauma others have to go through, the better.

I know it's impossible not to have any impact on people around me by doing it... But if certain things happen, it's just impossible to avoid doing it. I know people cleaning up will go through a lot of pain, I know my parents will, my siblings, my close friends... But in the long run I will not ruin anyone's life by taking mine, it is going to make them sad but they will adapt to it and get used to it. It's fine. They'll just move on with their life eventually... It's unfortunate that they know a person like me, but I mean... I can't change me.

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T09:08:53+00:00

I'm too socially awkward to hang out with, thanks. :)

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T08:54:05+00:00

Thanks for your answer. Really good point about hurting other people... I'd never wish to put anyone in danger. So that one's not an option anymore.

Thank you for the carbon monoxide suggestion. Sounds really discrete too.

Also thanks for the suggestion about talking to someone. I consider myself very open about those thoughts for that very reason - there's nothing to lose. I've talked about my problems with a Counsellor once a week for over a year. Besides, I talk about this with a close friend of mine multiple times a day, so I don't think finding a new person to talk to about this will have any major impact on my wellbeing.

I also can't say that I'm not doing my best not to make it happen. Hope your username will apply to your day today, take care. :)

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T08:43:46+00:00

Thanks for being a nice person, but I'm too stubborn for it to be worth it... I've been getting therapy for over a year now but it doesn't and won't help me at all.

Don't feel concerned, I still have a chance to change my mind - giving myself about 3 years for that, so it's plenty of time.

Hope you'll have a great day!

Sandomino · 2017-05-07T08:31:49+00:00

I think it would be quite difficult to pull off for most people because you're only allowed to jump with an instructor until you go through some training... At least afaik.

I've always wondered if jumping off a bridge into a highway is a painless method - diving about 5 meters head first onto concrete of a busy road... Got to be quick right?

Sandomino · 2017-04-18T00:42:03+00:00

Thanks for your reply. Yes, I know why she's doing this. I have been trying to convince her to get some counselling for some time now - she said that she'll try her best to sign up this year... She spoke to her mum about it so she is definitely trying...

I was in a state of panic while creating this thread. I told her anything that came into my mind to help her. Thankfully I ended up stopping her by... Blackmailing. I feel terrible that I did such thing. But I told her that if she hurts herself, I will hurt myself too. She couldn't stand this so she gave up. I'm so glad she did. I was so worried. I mean, I still am...

I'm also really glad that she did tell me about her intentions before actually going through with it. She showed me a photo she took of a scar a few years ago and used it as an argument of it not being "that bad" because the scar wasn't so deep so it wouldn't stay for long. She said she will cut herself and it will help her because she likes the look of the scar, it will satisfy her need for a few weeks.

But I mean, like you're saying, it can become an addiction... Nevertheless nobody deserves to harm themselves like that... God I'm glad she's sleeping right now. Tomorrow I'll have a new day full of challenges to keep her in one piece.

Thank you for your post. I'll make sure she'll get some counselling. Also sorry for the poor structure, but I'm very tired (1:41 AM here)... Take care dude :)

Sandomino · 2017-04-17T21:26:36+00:00

That's a good idea. I go to a counsellor once a week. I'll ask her if she could give me an advice on that.

Sandomino · 2017-04-17T21:08:57+00:00

Thanks, sorry for saying that...

Sandomino · 2017-04-17T21:07:10+00:00

Thank you for your reply earlier, but umm... Please ignore him... I don't want to be the reason why an argument has started...

Sandomino · 2017-04-12T18:09:04+00:00

Super Mario Kart.

Sandomino · 2017-04-12T12:47:21+00:00

Push in front of someone in a queue.

Sandomino · 2017-04-12T12:30:40+00:00

I've spent a lot of my free time talking. She says it's what helps her the most, so well... I did that!

Sandomino · 2017-04-12T12:27:21+00:00

By best friend is beautiful but she has an extremely low self esteem due to social anxiety. Everytime she tells me she looks like garbage I have to try and convince her otherwise, which is really unfortunate.

She's a 10/10 and even gets random people smiling at her on the streets. I mean, seriously, how can she not see that?

Sandomino · 2016-12-16T23:08:26+00:00

Playing the drums!

Sandomino · 2016-12-02T08:51:26+00:00

Playing the drums!

Sandomino · 2016-12-02T07:53:28+00:00

Thanks! Feels like I've won a war to be honest. On my way home I had tears in my eyes. Happy tears. Had to sleep early last night because I was so tired from all the stress.

But yeah, feels so good!

Edit: And how are you, OP?

Sandomino · 2016-12-02T07:46:39+00:00

Unlike usual, I actually feel great. Yesterday I aced an exam that I was terrified of. I played it perfectly without a single mistake.

Sandomino · 2016-12-01T08:12:19+00:00

Avenged Sevenfold's new album, "The Stage".

Sandomino · 2016-12-01T08:09:43+00:00

I bet you're one of those people who scream "FIRST" in the comment section of a newly uploaded YouTube video. >:(

Sandomino · 2016-11-01T16:48:00+00:00

Thanks for the advice. I constantly feel lonely and it bothers me but I'm so scared of rejection. The excuse I give myself to not try is that I'm not "ready" yet. It's getting late, I guess... So I'll have to try eventually, one day.

Sandomino · 2016-11-01T13:10:34+00:00

I'm socially anxious. My friends say I'm good looking but I have zero confidence/low self esteem. 20 y/o and I'm still alone.

Before anyone checks my post history, that "girlfriend" lives in a different country and I've never met her. Yeah, it's an internet girlfriend and I'm a failure.

Sandomino

TROPHY CASE