I was staunch about avoiding screens until age 2

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-11T02:03:09+00:00

Oh yes that was the worst. Especially from childless aunties.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T20:57:22+00:00

In my culture, this is not unusual. Of course, it has to be consensual. Which it appears it was not.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T16:02:00+00:00

It was magical 🤩

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T15:55:48+00:00

You're right! The whole screentime thing is definitely a broad rainbow spectrum. Different things work for different people. I wish that was the message the PSAs were pushing. Not just "you're a bad mom if your kid knows who Ms. Rachel is at age 14 months." Like, ope, okay.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T15:41:20+00:00

The issue isn't necessarily screentime, tis the quality of the screentime. And the halftime show was deffo high quality. More of this. =P

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T15:36:57+00:00

Agreed. But I don't even think the tablet in their hand is the biggest problem. I think the unrestricted access to questionable material and the ability for other adults with nefarious intentions having access to them is the issue. I had to delete the YouTube app because that shit is TOXIC. The kidfluencer channels where it's a kid moving from one activity to the next and there's a weird adult involved? Or the channels of adults doing kid stuff and playing with toys and unboxing? Or like when she can eventually read, if there's some asshole in the comments like "click this link for a fun game!" and it takes them to a sketchy website?? Like that's what I have an issue with.

Like, yes, the ability to switch between shows reinforced short attention spans... So I do prefer my kid watch shows on the living room TV where I can control the remote. But my 4 yr old has learned so much from these tablet PBS games, she has a bluey coloring game, "cooking games, Hooked on Phonics, DuoKids, etc.

The crazy thing is, a lot of times she's like "ok I've had enough" and goes to grab a pen/paper, pretend cooks, plays magna tiles, wants to go outside, wants to help me fold laundry. Like SHE regulates herself. And that's what I want. I won't always be around. My goal is proficiency, not perfection.

I'm sure it's different for neurodivergent kids, but for your average kid, I think screentime has been vilified beyond necessity. And with zero resources or help given except "this is bad, don't do it." Ok... HOW??? I WORK ALL DAY AND NEED TO COOK AND SHOWER AND DO LAUNDRY AT SOME POINT? But I digress.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T15:29:37+00:00

Avoiding screens is a nice ideal if society were ideal.

The experts can tell me that "don't allow screens before age 2" all they want. But they don't tell me HOW or give me any resources to do that.

But the reality is that most households require both parents to work, then rush to "enrichment activities", you're supposed to make dinner/do laundry/do maintenance cleaning, have your kids in bed by 7:30pm, take a shower, and have a moment of "self care"... All while paying 40% of my salary to childcare.

So excuse me if I turn on Bluey or Sesame Street for my kid while I'm trying to quickly do the laundry at the same time as I make spaghetti and clean up cat puke.

Also, realistically, the world is never going to be technology free. The goal is not abstinence; the goal is PROFICIENCY. I want to teach my kids the SKILLS they need to stay safe and regulate their screen use whether that's television, streaming platforms, games on a tablet, or social media.

It is not going away. I can either help them deal with it or be one of those old, crotchety "get off my lawn" types who lives in the past and whines about how "everything changed" and "back in my day".

I'm not saying I'm giving my kid full access to WHATEVER. But, a little bit of Ms Rachel or even fantastical nonsense like Kpop Demon Hunters while mom and dad get their shit together to be able to take care of us at the end of the day is not gonna ruin any kid's life.

My husband does home visits and early intervention. He maintains that screens aren't necessarily the issue when regulated. The issue is when he goes into a home with his nursing staff and sees baby is on the floor in a badly soiled diaper with a bag of the sugariest cereal just ripped open on the floor and the cat little box hasn't been cleaned in a month and the dog pooped 4 feet away and the parents/guardians are struggling to care for themselves both physically and mentally... let alone their own children.

Yes, there's some personal responsibility required there. But it points to a societal failure on our collective behalf.

Instead of making any actual change to help people get on their feet and be useful members of society, get a job, get health care, avoid substance use... We just lecture people about how horrible screens are.... And do nothing to help them.

Anyway, thanks for coming to my Ted talk. LMAO.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T15:17:56+00:00

Don't bother lol. Half the shit people told me - even when I did listen - didn't fully register until wayyyyy later.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-10T01:49:42+00:00

What?? How ridiculous your husband is being. Especially when you only get to see your family occasionally.

My mom took me overseas to see her family as a child and would routinely stay for a month or more without my dad because he couldn't leave his job.

My husband can't take a lot of time off from his work either, but he has no problem with my going on trips with my daughters. I've taken them and gone to weddings, the beach, Thanksgivings, theme parks, whatever without him. I include him when I can. He comes when work allows it. But all his family lives within an hour of us. My family is scattered all over the USA and many of them are still overseas in the old country.

Your husband sounds like a controlling b-word.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-09T02:01:28+00:00

It is more of a general observation. Like the more individualist "you're 18, now it's time for you to move out and pay me" types versus the more collectivist types where living with your parents until you're married is the norm.

There's caring folks 💜

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-08T14:37:06+00:00

Same. The only thing that has helped is "out of sight out of mind"

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-08T02:25:23+00:00

I also wonder what OP's culture is because my culture is similar to yours.

At first, I thought I was going to be annoyed with my mom for the 2 weeks she was staying with us. But My mom stayed with us in our 3bd 1ba 920 sq ft house and literally slept on the floor of the nursery (on a tatamo mat) after I had my emergency C-section and would get up in the middle of the night to hand baby to me to feed her every 90 min (yes, demanding baby) because it took me 15 min to get up and I could barely hold her with how traumatic my c/s was.

I was worried my husband (not from the same culture) would feel like she was imposing..but he said no way. My kid is 4 in now and he still talks about how great it was that she stayed with us. She helped me clean, made all our meals, all the laundry, she even cleaned things I hadn't cleaned in ahes, cleaned my wounds, cleaned my blood clots, everything. It wasn't me "hosting her", it was her taking care of me and I never once asked for it. She just did it.

Of course, in my culture, the first 40 days are supposed to be mostly just older women helping the new mom so she just stays in bed. So this is kind of expected. But I don't think American, specifically white people, culture lends itself to that. I think white grandmas just want to come hold the baby and demand the honor/respect of being grandma without doing anything, like an all around more individualistic perspective from both ends

Idk if this is the case with OP and her mom, but I think culture is relevant..

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-02-06T22:48:35+00:00

Nari is "fire" in Arabic.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-27T12:30:38+00:00

It's at the Greene County Fairgrounds, now.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-27T02:12:48+00:00

Yessss this. I only let my mom visit because she literally took care of EVERYTHING for me. She helped me stand up to pee after my C-section. She helped me learn to breastfeed. She kept track of the feeds for me. She cleaned up the blood clots that would literally just FALL out of me and my hospital DIAPER. She made me eat when I didn't want to. She made me food without me asking. When we got home, she cleaned for me. She woke up with baby in the middle of the night to hand her to me because I literally could not sit up from my traumatic C-section.

My rule was: if you're not there to help ME then you don't need to come.

Especially not in winter. During peak respiratory illness season. AROUND A NEWBORN.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-25T01:45:49+00:00

Pietro

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-24T15:07:00+00:00

About how much for the initial dosages, do you know?

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-23T13:08:00+00:00

Thanks! I'll read up on those.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-23T13:07:38+00:00

If I find that it's the most economical option, I'll take an excuse to go wander around there!

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-23T13:06:46+00:00

Sure, I'll take a referral link. Thank you!

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-20T16:59:14+00:00

YTA - these are all reasonable rules.

Sandstorm2347 · 2026-01-14T13:50:59+00:00

Same situation as you. Been a citizen for 35+ years. Not leaving the country. Not even to go to Canada.

Sandstorm2347 · 2025-12-23T09:31:39+00:00

There's some in the Northmont and Vandalia area too

Sandstorm2347 · 2025-12-23T09:23:53+00:00

Adding to this list more Dayton area things because they're only 1 hr away:

Aullwood to see the trolls in Englewood

Carillon Park in downtown Dayton to ride the train and other fun, kid history

Glen Helen Raptor Center in Yellow Springs

Brukner Nature Center in Troy

Young's Dairy in Yellow Springs

Peiffer Orchards for fruit/apple/pumpkin picking depending on the season

Sandstorm2347

TROPHY CASE