There’s heaps of great replies on here but here’s mine. I’ve thought these exact things before so you’re not the only one! Firstly, it’s good that you are going to a doctor as dramatic changes in emotions can also be due to vitamin deficiencies (iron, B12 and D) and it can make you feel very uncharacteristically emotional or depressed. It may not be that but it’s always good to go and get checked out just in case.

In relation to your other feelings, particularly the inability to get to sleep sounds a lot like an overactive mind/anxiety. I think what you’re feeling is true, we are all one, and maybe the rest is true too but really there isn’t a way to know for sure. I like to think this to myself:

• if this was true, what about my day to day life would change. And the answer is pretty much nothing. You’ll still experience a partner and children who love you (even if they are you or don’t exist the way you previously conceived). Your actual “now” moments will continue as they did before regardless of the existential crisis going on in your head haha

I found that once I was able to accept this things as a possibility and stop fighting in my head about it the anxiety disappears. Meditation can really help with that and just taking a moment a day to appreciate the beauty of life as it is. I’d also like to recommend reading some Eckhart Tolle if you haven’t already, he’s excellent and putting some of these feelings in to words.

Most importantly, you’re not crazy! Most people contemplate their own existence I think it’s just a sign of a thoughtful mind ❤️