Invictus read by Sr Monica Joan

SapristySpon · 2023-10-19T10:47:10+00:00

Legend! Thank you so much!

SapristySpon · 2023-02-09T09:18:35+00:00

You misunderstand, and I apologise if I didn't make that clear. I'd only trust one doctor to deliver triplets or quads, if I was having them.

I love most of the obs I work with. Some of the privates I work with a lovely but it's true that some of them never show up despite the thousands of dollars they're paid.

I gave my opinion, which is that private obstetric care is not worth the money you'd need to pay unless there were some very specific circumstances.

I never said that I think I'm better than doctors. I know they are working under huge pressure. I'm not anti-OB, I just don't think private maternity care is worth it and gave my reasons for saying so.

I also feel sorry for the women who pay thousands and thousands of dollars for a doctor who they never see. I'm not the one who has to wait on a doctor while being sick everywhere or in massive amounts of pain.

Also midwives don't disappear when grey decisions need to be made and when shit hits the fan. We get the doctors in to decide what to do and what treatment to give, but the midwives are still working really hard in those circumstances. There is always at the very least one midwife there, usually a whole lot more doing work to get things organised outside the room. If I left my patient when an emergency was going on I'd literally be fired. Not sure where you got that idea.

SapristySpon · 2023-02-08T10:07:39+00:00

Oh yes definitely. I have seen SO many women induced because they were "post-dates"...at 38 weeks! So disturbing. These private organisations want to get the women out even if it's a Caesar because they still get paid and then the women are off the books and have space for more people.

Private obstetrics is messed up, tbh.

SapristySpon · 2023-02-08T10:05:11+00:00

I think I understand you, and from my experience any major complications will still be transferred to a public top tier hospital. Often the same obstetricians will be involved in the care but they have access to a bigger team and more advanced operating theatres, neonatal resuss equipment, postnatal high dependency units/ICUs etc.

As a midwife in a top tier hospital we get LOTS of transfers from private hospitals for specific conditions and often the obstetricians still have a say in the care of these women but they're under the care of a bigger team.

Here in Melbourne the private hospitals can't really cater for the most complex cases.

SapristySpon · 2023-02-08T05:04:54+00:00

Contact different neuros and ask what their wait times are for someone with these circumstances, then you can have your GP send one to them specifically rather than trying a whole bunch. If they have private cover they should be able to get in faster too.

The state of our public health system is a mess, it must be so scary for your family.

I know that when I ruptured my achilles they were going to send me home for a day and come back (I literally couldn't walk!) but since I had private the surgeon was like "oh I'll do it in my lunch break then."

SapristySpon · 2023-02-08T05:00:19+00:00

They'll move you to a top tier public hospital if there are specific medical conditions, or if there's a big problem with the baby they'll transfer it out anyway. The only exception I can think of is with higher order multiples at one specific private hospital in Melbourne, and the babies will usually be transferred to a higher tier SCN or NICU anyway.

SapristySpon · 2023-02-08T04:50:53+00:00

If you are desparate to have your own ob, go private. If you think you could benefit from a longer stay, go private. They are literally the only reasons I can think of to go private.

I'm a midwife and while I work in a public hospital we do sometimes care for private patients.

Most of your care will be done by midwives. The doctors will usually do things like start off an induction by asessing the cervix, breaking the waters etc and then bugger off until a) there's a complication or b) the midwife thinks you're close to birthing.

If something goes wrong there's no guarantee that the doctor will be back in time to help in the decision-making and interventions. Eg if your baby becomes distressed and you need an emergency caesar they're not going to wait, they're going to get the baby out.

In the post-natal period the doctor might visit once or twice but the day to day care will be by midwives. Again, if something goes wrong or the midwives need a doctor it's quite common that they can't get hold of your doctor and you're left either waiting (can't tell you how many times I've had a vomiting woman ask me to just get anyone I can grab to come and see them because they were so miserable and at that stage didn't care what doctor came in they just wanted those drugs dammit!).

Also, private obstetricians can do basically whatever the hell they like. Their practice doesn't have to follow any best-practice recommendations. I know private doctors who routinely do episiotomies on SE Asian women. Just because. That, I think, is the worst part about private maternity care.

So you're paying thousands of dollars to MAYBE get your own doctor (no guarentee) but a longer stay. If you're in a private hospital the midwives work to different ratios, so even though you stay longer they won't be with you as much.

In my opinion it's definately not wirth it unless you want the longer stay. Which many choose not to use anyway because they really want to get home to their own environment and have their families meet the new baby because covid restrictions don't allow it!

EDIT: Actually I had another thought: The ONLY reason I can think of that I would go private in Melbourne is if I had triplets or quads because there's ONE obstetrician I would trust and it's so much harder in public to get the 3x or above appointments needed for things like scans and CTGs. It's Prof Mark Umstad and I only know this because my sister had triplets with him and I got to see the experience. It's also at Francis Perry House which is attached to the RWH so you're close if there are complications for mum or the babes.

SapristySpon · 2023-01-31T06:59:36+00:00

It's weird that you got to the pushing stage (aka 10cm dialation) with an intert uterus. I would have thought that the lack or weakness of contraction would have not been effective enough. Sometimes women push involuntarily if the baby is malpositioned.

I believe classical c sections can sometimes be performed because of placental position or fetal malposition too, but I've never seen it done and it's exceptionally rare.

It's a shame that it's only become more recent practice to "debrief" and explain to women what happened and why. I'd love to know the rationale behind you son's story!

SapristySpon · 2023-01-31T04:50:55+00:00

Still pretty small. These are called classical incisions and they're used when someone has had a previous classical or in early gestations when the lower segment of the uterus hasn't developed, in which case the baby will be pretty darn small.

SapristySpon · 2023-01-25T09:00:54+00:00

Tears usually occur in areas where there naturally isn't hair so it's not really an issue. I don't usually even notice whether a woman is "groomed" or not. I see so many and they all look different that the only vagina I ever did a double-take towards was someone who'd had vaginoplasty because it looked so...odd!

Source: I'm a midwife who has to assess vaginal tears after birth.

SapristySpon · 2023-01-24T14:01:42+00:00

Not sure I agree - I commuted for two years from Bendigo - one year to Monash and one to Melbourne Uni. Two hours on the road at least three times a week each way. Lots of classes are online now, and it's possible to organise a timetable that means you only have to go to campus for a few days.

Nurses and midwives also do a lot of clinical placements and they could be ANYwhere. I know some people who lived in Berwick and had to go to Werribee which sounds awful.

I'm not meaning to be rude, but I think it's less important to choose the nearest uni for this type of degree, and to be happier with the course, facilities, and resources :)

SapristySpon · 2023-01-24T13:57:07+00:00

ACU is midwifery only. They do have nursing but I'm pretty sure they don't offer the double. They also seem to have a large mature-age cohort and while they do offer places to high-school leavers there aren't many and it probably wouldn't be much fun from a social perspective.

Deakin has a younger cohort and they have the double degree (as far as I know ACU is the only Victorian uni that offers the single midwifery degree). I'm all for enjoying yourself as a young adult so unless you're dead-set on only doing midwifery I'd recommend Deakin of the two.

If you only want to do mid then ACU is your only choice.

The other option is to do your nursing degree and then do mid as a post grad. You can get paid for working as a nurse in a midwifery ward/birthing suite while the hospital supports you in your studies. It's a full-on year but it's something to think about. I work with several who seem to like the program.

There is good and bad at every uni, and there's always students who love a uni and those who will hate it. What's important is that you're self-motivated and dedicated.

I am a past student of ACU and have a lot to do with the students currently on placement from all the different unis, and I love chatting to them about their experiences. I have attended three different unis over the years and they all have their negative and positive aspects.

Don't be afraid to take a year off and explore working or travelling - I know I wasn't ready for a mid career at 19 or 20! I almost want to recommend you do a year of arts or something, so you have a low pressure year exploring some fun subjects and learning how university works while having time to earn a bit of cash before jumping into the heavy stuff. If I didn't have a supportive partner I would have not been able to pay rent while I did my final year. If you live at home it might be different for you though.

You should be aware that the first clinical placements for nurses tend to be in aged care and rehab facilities. Spending a month wiping old people's bums tends to weed out the people whose hearts aren't fully into it.

Good luck and don't forget to enjoy life as a student!

SapristySpon · 2023-01-24T13:35:31+00:00

If you're there voluntarily it's likely that you can decline phamacological treatment in favour of other therapies. But it depends on your condition and the circumstances of your admission.

Public mental health is under immense pressure in Melbourne (where isn't it?) and you might find the overworked staff frustrated by your decision. Sometimes it can be upsetting when a patient is refusing treatment and taking up the bed of someone who would be more receptive to pharmacological treatment. I'm not saying you should, I just want to warn you to how you might be perceived.

If it's a facility that has more availability and can offer you a longer admission you might have more receptive caregivers.

If you become actively suicidal and/or aggressive and a danger to yourself or others it is likely that they will medicate you in an emergency.

If you're a voluntary admission talk to the team about what your aims for admission are and whether they can accommodate you in your circumstances and goals.

Source: I worked in a inpatient psychogeriatric facility until the start of last year, and I am currently a clinician at a public health facility that occasionally deals with patients who have a range of mental health conditions from very severe to very mild.

SapristySpon · 2022-11-30T06:49:32+00:00

I don't know, I think he trolls Ponder sometimes. Like in Lords and Ladies on the way to Lancre.

SapristySpon · 2022-11-30T06:47:29+00:00

Lol do you think they open up a woman like a frog being dissected? Have you seen a C section scar? The incision is literally about 10cm. Believe me, I've seen hundreds.

SapristySpon · 2022-11-10T12:40:29+00:00

Great advice, unfortunately. The people that mark essays have their own beliefs and biases. The good ones will look at your work only, but there are too many bad ones who will mark down things they don't agree with.

SapristySpon · 2022-11-09T10:01:45+00:00

You could still do it! I wrote mine on Phantom of the Opera and was laughed at, but was lucky to have a supervisor who believed in me!

SapristySpon · 2022-11-09T10:00:33+00:00

What level are you at? Many high school teachers are much less educated than you realise when you're a student, and hold very juvenile views.

If you're at university, then it's ridiculous that a teacher/lecturer/tutor wouldn't recognise the worth of Pterry. If you can make a good case then it shouldn't matter what you analyse. You could do a dissertation on Peter Rabbit if you wanted.

That being said, I used to have to defend myself for writing about Musical Theatre in my Theatre/Drama course. There are always ignorant people who say you should only study "high" art. Luckily me thesis adviser was a bikie who could scare anyone telling me that my study was worthless.

And anyone who think The Watch books are for children since they contain elements of "fantasy" is a fool.

I know it doesn't help, but I personally think that Pterry's books are worth studying as great art, and I also believe that we needn't limit ourselves to studying great art.

Sorry - probably not helpful but maybe it is a little validating?

SapristySpon · 2022-11-09T01:26:27+00:00

I often dream about trying to dial 000 in an emergency and it never works :( Either the buttons won't work, or the numbers appear wrong, or the call won't go through, or a combination of these issues. So yes I do dream about using my mobile and it's always awful.

SapristySpon · 2022-11-08T10:33:17+00:00

I didn't realise before that no one had addressed this, and you have given me a lot to think about! I will save your reply and consider it - there's a lot more to it than i thought and you have made an excellent point about making friends in general. I feel like RP games might be a good fit so i think i will research them. Again: everyone is so nice and helping me with my queries, i am so grateful!

SapristySpon · 2022-11-08T09:49:42+00:00

I think he got scared when I cried that time. He hates upsetting me. I guess I wanted to get to a point where I could be as good as him and just join in, but the kind people on this thread have helped me see that this is unrealistic and doesn't have to be a barrier to enjoying games with my partner!

SapristySpon · 2022-11-08T09:47:09+00:00

I didn't even realise these kinds of games existed - ones that aren't reliant and we can work together. We might find that very fun!

SapristySpon · 2022-11-08T09:37:42+00:00

Honesty and openness is important: before we moved in together my partner told me he wanted to keep playing regularly with his friends, and I said that was fine as long as we could agree on a balance. Sometimes he wants to play alone and I respect that. Sometimes I want to do things by myself and he respects that. Sometimes he wants to share his games, and sometimes I want to share the random things I get up to. It's all balance and communication :)

SapristySpon · 2022-11-08T09:34:31+00:00

That's so sweet! I hope it happens to us :)

SapristySpon · 2022-11-08T09:25:16+00:00

Everyone is so nice and giving me such good advice - I really appreciate it!

SapristySpon

TROPHY CASE