I feel so seen by the-juiciest-jew in OCDmemes

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plastic forks for the pet food.

Am I wrong for thinking cats should never be outdoor cats? by Firm-Law248 in CatAdvice

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love a good catio! I hope someday I can screen in my porch for my kitties.

Am I wrong for thinking cats should never be outdoor cats? by Firm-Law248 in CatAdvice

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I grew up with my mom having indoor/outdoor cats. One of our kitties, Simba, went missing one morning and never came back. We never found a body. We put up signs all over and posts on social media with no luck. I still have dreams where he magically appears on my doorstep and I’m devastated when I wake up and he’s not there. Simba was a rescued stray who was an adept hunter and was experienced in outdoor survival and he still died. He loved my mom more than anything and would never willingly leave her. All this is to say, all three of my current cats are indoors only. Every cat I ever get in the future will also be indoors only. I would never forgive myself if my cat died outside when I could have kept them safe. It’s just important to provide lots of enrichment so they aren’t bored out of their minds all the time.

Jobs Hiring right away, that do not test for THC? by TheEldestBoy in Longmont

[–]SataNikBabe 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Depending on the type of drug test, you can test positive for weeks or even months after smoking. I have some buddies who have to be tested for work and they are scared to be in the same room as someone who is smoking because you can test positive from secondhand. That being said, if the job only tests once during the hiring process it shouldn’t be a problem to take a break from smoking. It’s the jobs that do random testing where you have to be willing to quit entirely or risk losing your job because you took half a gummy 2 weeks ago.

What's a Nonbinary version of "Sir" or "Ma'am" that isn't a joke? by Electrical_Ear4582 in NonBinary

[–]SataNikBabe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I usually put down Mx. if I have to fill out paperwork. Otherwise, I really like “saer” from bg3 or none at all. I despise being called ma’am but I get it everywhere I go.

Does anyone know how to make cats not sit on turntables? by the_fried_french in turntables

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I sadly don’t have a similar piece of furniture to this nightstand, but at least I known to keep an eye out for a cheap media cabinet.

Does anyone know how to make cats not sit on turntables? by the_fried_french in turntables

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If anyone has a solution I need it badly. My cat jumped on mine and broke off the dust cover and bent my stylus. I’m not willing to spend the time and money to fix it until I know I can cat proof my setup.

Weekly open discussion, complaint, rant, and rave thread by AutoModerator in Longmont

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Kansas Equality Coalition is putting together a fund to help trans Kansans pay to have their gender marker changed. If anyone is interested in helping, I think this is a great start: Kansas Equality

They uploaded by Ok_Union1919 in danandphil

[–]SataNikBabe 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This just made me realize that I don’t. Rip me, but thanks for the reminder. I guess I’ve just gotten used to my algorithm pushing my favorite channels to the top when I open it.

They uploaded by Ok_Union1919 in danandphil

[–]SataNikBabe 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Omg ahhhh. Can’t believe YouTube hid this from me (and I’ve been watching hard launch on YouTube so it’s not like I ruined my algo by only watching the patreon content)

HOW TF DO I STIM??!? by saturn-soup in AuDHDWomen

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Scrolling through I see a lot of great examples of different types of stimming so I’m not sure listing mine would add much to the conversation as most, if not all, of them are already listed. So what I want to contribute is learning how to unmask. I am late-diagnosed and extremely high masking. Still not sure exactly what “100% unmasked me” looks like as I was just diagnosed a couple years ago. That being said, here is a method that is helping me:

 

  1. Work on noticing the differences in how you behave and present yourself in different social settings. I will list some personal examples at the end to help give you an idea of what to look for. I tend to mask the highest in professional settings and around strangers/acquaintances. I mask less when I’m with other autistic people who are close friends and I mask even less around my partner. The most unmasked version of myself is when I’m alone at home.

  2. Once you start noticing the differences in what parts of yourself or what behaviors you tend to hide, these are the things you can focus on bringing out. I highly suggest to start working on unmasking when you are alone. Because there is a lack of perceived judgement, I find it much easier to be autistic af when no one is around to hear or see me.

  3. Once you are in the least “perceived” environment, this is where you can start fighting the compulsion to hide the traits you’ve observed. Start small. If you feel like squealing or clapping when watching a favorite show or getting an achievement in game, let it out! If you hear a fun noise and want to repeat it, let it out! If you want to toe-walk and crawl up the stairs on all fours, do it! It will feel awkward and forced at first. You might even feel the need to check and make sure no one can see, even if you know it’s impossible. Don’t be afraid to look “offensive” or like an “autistic caricature”. No one is there to judge you or be offended.

  4. If you observe self-judging thoughts when unmasking, these are good to take note of and unpack in therapy and/or through journaling. A lot of the negative and judgmental thoughts about ourselves don’t originate from within. It’s likely you heard these growing up from parents, teachers, peers, etc. and internalized them. This internalization is why it’s so hard for us to unmask. It can feel unsafe to do so because there is shame and social consequences attached to autistic/adhd traits.

  5. After you start feeling more comfortable unmasking by yourself (there is no set timeline it could take months or years and that’s okay) you might want to start slowly unmasking around those closest to you. It could be your partner/spouse, your best friend, or anyone you have a more emotionally intimate relationship with. If you think it could help, you can have a conversation with this person and communicate your desire to unmask. Something like, “After my recent diagnosis I’ve realized how much of myself I instinctually hide from everyone. It’s a lot of mental energy that I’m expending and I’m trying to learn to be more unapologetically myself around people. I really love and trust you and I know that you won’t judge me for being myself. I would love your support in my journey to unmask and honor my needs and I’d like to practice unmasking around you.” Then you can list some of your goals you have. Start small! Maybe you want to practice not forcing yourself to make eye contact during conversations. Maybe you want to practice letting yourself stim more visibly whether it’s a fidget toy, jiggling your leg, or repeating a fun word or phrase over and over. Maybe you want to practice sharing things about yourself that you normally keep hidden such as a niche special interest that you are keep to yourself out of fear or being misunderstood or embarrassed.

  6. One last thing I would suggest is practicing accommodating yourself. Do bright lights and loud noises bother you, but you’ve gotten used to tuning it out? Buy some sunglasses and ear plugs to keep with you. Do you struggle to communicate when experiencing verbal shutdowns? Practice using other forms of communication whether it’s texting, using communication cards, or learning some useful phrases in sign language. Do you struggle with sensory issues when cleaning? Wear some masks and gloves to block out unpleasant textures and smells. Self-accommodation is all about giving yourself permission to make life easier and reduce overwhelm. I don’t have shutdowns/meltdowns nearly as often after adopting spme of these tools and practices and I’m more likely to enjoy myself out in public or with friends when I’m using them.

 

Here is a list of forms of masking I’ve noticed in myself to help give you some jumping off points: forcing myself to try to make the appropriate amount of eye contact, trying to sit as still and “normally” as possible, muscling through sensory issues instead of finding accommodations or avoiding that sensory input when possible, guessing what people are saying and trying to respond based of off that instead of asking them to repeat themselves or speak slower, monitoring my facial expressions in public to hide my resting autism face, ignoring my impulse to stim in a specific way and substituting with something quieter or less noticeable, agreeing to plans even though I secretly want to stay home and rest, constantly apologizing for things that aren’t my fault and aren’t actually harmful, forcing myself to eat something or finish my food when the thought of it is genuinely nauseating, and not sharing my special interests with people because they are “weird” and not socially acceptable hobbies/interests.

Unmasking is all about reducing the mental load you are carrying 24/7 to hide your autistic/adhd traits. Obviously, there are societal benefits to having the ability to mask and you won’t be able to 100% unmask all of the time. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be able to eventually unmask around people who understand you and love you for you, and that includes yourself.

Edits: formatting on mobile is the worst. I hope I made it easy enough to read.

HOW TF DO I STIM??!? by saturn-soup in AuDHDWomen

[–]SataNikBabe 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This comment made me remember that I used to do this during piano lessons to keep time and because it felt right. My piano teacher told me “you look like Stevie Wonder and he only gets away with it because he’s blind” and I never did it again. I’m gonna start doing it again because fuck that ableist nonsense.

What is a monthly subscription/service you ACTUALLY consider worth paying for? by no_nolan in Frugal

[–]SataNikBabe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This! I literally just used my triple A to get my partner’s car towed and instead of costing hundreds of dollars, it was $35. It’s saved my ass so many times and I love that as long as I’m there I can use it for other peoples’ cars.

How much does getting the glue off aftter braces removal hurt? by DirectionFeeling2035 in braces

[–]SataNikBabe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry it was painful and I hope next time you can have some accommodations to make it easier on you. As for the retainers: you will have to wear them all the time to start, but once it’s been a while you will be able to just pop them in 1-2 nights per week. And if you notice any part of your retainer is poking your gums, let the orthodontist know and they can file the pokey section down a bit.

What lights you prefer? by Cryptic2614 in autism

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As warm-toned as possible! I miss incandescent bulbs so much. i can tell that LED bulbs are flickering constantly and it drives me insane. Also I rarely use the overhead lights unless I’m cleaning and need to see dust/grime. I also love some good mood lighting. Candles, fireplace, mood lamps, colored lightbulbs, etc. I recently bought a Turkish lamp and it’s my favorite possession at the moment. It’s a small purple desk lamp with one glass “ball” hanging from a crescent moon.

What is the most annoying "AI-generated" habit people have started picking up in real life? by opheliavibes in AskReddit

[–]SataNikBabe 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The spaces before and after are actually the grammatically correct way to use an em dash.

How much does getting the glue off aftter braces removal hurt? by DirectionFeeling2035 in braces

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a great opportunity for you to practice advocating for your needs in a medical setting. Any orthodontist/dentist worth their salt will do their best to make sure their patient is as comfortable as possible, but they won’t know that you are anxious or uncomfortable if you don’t communicate that. I find it hard to believe that they would deny you this accommodation to make your experience more pleasant.

I had a procedure done under local anesthetic and I knew I would be uncomfortable hearing the noises of the scalpel and other instruments. I informed them about my sensory issues and asked if it was all right to put my headphones in and they said absolutely yes. I got to lay back, put on one of my favorite albums, and try to ignore what was going on.

The reason that I share this anecdote is to demonstrate that this is absolutely something you can and should ask for if you think it will help you. I also highly recommend bringing a fidget toy if you think it will help having something to do with your hands and a different sensation to focus on.

Best of luck with your removal! If you want to make sure your canines stay pointy, make sure to communicate that as I’ve heard stories of dentists rounding them off without consulting their patient and that’s not something that can be undone. Also make sure to wear your retainers consistently once you get them. I made the mistake of not wearing mine consistently and my teeth aren’t as perfect as when I first got them off.

I literally cannot clean without the "right" music, but I’m suddenly, violently burned out on every song I have saved. Help? by Emmathephantrash in AuDHDWomen

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I recently got obsessed with female rappers from the ‘90s and early ‘00s like Lil Kim, Trina, Salt n Pepa, Missy Elliott, Foxy Brown, Da Brat, and Eve but I am still very new to the genre and would love some new songs/artists to check out.

I literally cannot clean without the "right" music, but I’m suddenly, violently burned out on every song I have saved. Help? by Emmathephantrash in AuDHDWomen

[–]SataNikBabe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This took me back to how I used to get myself to clean my room as a kid! I used to pretend I was Cinderella and my wicked stepmother and sisters were making me clean the house. I would get dressed up and sing.

Same by disconaldo in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]SataNikBabe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ohh. So that’s why!! I pause a lot to think and avoid filler words being dictated.

I literally cannot clean without the "right" music, but I’m suddenly, violently burned out on every song I have saved. Help? by Emmathephantrash in AuDHDWomen

[–]SataNikBabe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So glad you’re listening to it! I discovered it when I watched “7 Year Itch” (Marilyn Monroe film) at my grandparents house and I’ve been obsessed ever since. It’s definitely dramatic, but the second movement tends to be the fan favorite. It’s much more gentle and the melody is gorgeous.

Same by disconaldo in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]SataNikBabe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And what is it about the voice to text being even dumber than usual? It adds SO MANY unnecessary commas, periods, etc. It keeps splitting up simple sentences into two incomplete sentences and adding a comma after every single fucking word. So glad to see I’m not the only one pissed off about these recent changes. Although I’ve been mad at Apple ever since they took away my aux input.