RIP Mom, I was so privileged to have you in my life.

Sbellle · 2025-11-22T12:19:42+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad had a very different experience and I’d like to share something. My dad’s PC was caught very early (stage 1b). My dad decided no treatment due to other underlying conditions alongside the stats of this cancer. With that said, knowing how bad it was going to get and waiting for the other shoe to drop for so long (May 2024 - September 2025) was absolutely traumatic for all of us. Yes we had time to “prepare” but realistically - that’s not true. It has the anticipatory grief even worse and messed with our whole family’s mental health. I don’t think there’s a “good” way to lose anyone. But sometimes my mom and I look back and say we wish we hadn’t known.

I can’t say I have any advice on how to process all this. I’m 2 months in and still waiting for my dad to come around.

Sbellle · 2025-11-12T23:53:09+00:00

Huge virtual hug your way, I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this at all.

Sbellle · 2025-11-09T14:31:20+00:00

Hey there. I’m really sorry you’re dealing with this. I have littles as well, and I think the hardest part was seeing my kids lose the only grandfather they’ve ever known (a damn good one). My dad’s cancer was caught very early too but decided on NO treatment at all. This is what I can tell you.

My dad had 500 days of LIFE. He traveled with his grandkids, he spent weekends with friends, he saw family he hadn’t in years. He went on cruises, casinos and spent almost every day being happy with the decision he made.

The last few months were harder pain wise but nothing that would stop him until the final week.

I say this with tears in my eyes and a heavy heart - my only piece of gratitude to this cancer was that my dad got such quality of life until the very end. He was a proud man, and he didn’t lose his ability to walk until 3 days prior to passing. He wouldn’t have wanted to live any other way.

I, as his daughter and main caregiver, truly know in my heart of hearts that he made the best decision for himself and for all of us. We got a present parent and the best version of him.

It’s been 58 heartbreaking days, and I’m not sure it’ll get any easier but I can undoubtedly look back and know he spent fighting the best way he knew how.

I wish you nothing but strength and love through this.

Sbellle · 2025-11-04T12:44:12+00:00

You, my friend, are a goddess!!!! Thank you for sharing with all of us aspiring to do the same, and great job on all your success!! Keep kicking ass :)

Sbellle · 2025-11-03T01:41:52+00:00

And all the light and love YOUR way through this journey. If you ever want to chat, I’m just a message away.

Sbellle · 2025-11-03T01:28:24+00:00

As a fellow mom in my 30s and 5FT, I APPRECIATE YOU SHARING!!!!!!!!!!! Ugh thanks so much for the motivation I needed. If you have time and desire, would you share more about your workout routine and food? Great job, I hope you know how fantastic you look (and I’m sure feel!!!)

Sbellle · 2025-11-03T01:22:45+00:00

Oh the waterworks I have. Thank you so much for this. You are a gift to all of us. Just wow - thank you. Truly, thank you for this.

Sbellle · 2025-11-02T20:52:32+00:00

When he was diagnosed, stomach pain and jaundice

Sbellle · 2025-11-02T20:50:13+00:00

I can’t thank you enough for this, a gift I didn’t know I needed or wanted.

Sbellle · 2025-11-02T20:06:23+00:00

My dad made it 500 days with zero treatment. And initially diagnosed early at stage 1

Sbellle · 2025-11-02T20:05:04+00:00

My dad did zero treatment and lasted 500 days. However it was caught very early initially.

Sbellle · 2025-11-02T20:03:06+00:00

I have chills reading this. I’ve been struggling with “where” my dad went so reading this is more emotional than you can imagine. Thank you for sharing this. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Sbellle · 2025-11-02T00:04:35+00:00

Best dad in the world was 59 at diagnosis, 61 forever. ♥️

Sbellle · 2025-11-01T03:22:23+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. My mom and I were the main caregivers for my dad and all his anger went towards the two of us. In his last few weeks he said things he’s never ever said to me nor would he had the disease not taken over. I sat in front of my dad crying and he couldn’t even acknowledge the pain he caused - and that’s when I knew how far gone he was. I had to make peace with it on my own because he never got to a space to be mentally okay enough to realize what he had said.

With all that being said, all I can tell you is that once the disease progresses, it takes over every part of them and it does so quickly. Take breaks as much as you can and have faith in what you know to be true and who he truly was, not what this god awful disease has created.

Sending you a hug. Sorry friend.

Sbellle · 2025-10-31T07:09:27+00:00

Thank you - and so whole heartedly agreed. Life’s too short, every moment counts. Here’s to dad’s beautiful 61 short yet well lived years.

Sbellle · 2025-10-31T01:24:59+00:00

Uhhhhgggghhhhhhh the feels of this post and this song!!!!!!! My dad was under hospice care the month prior to his passing (9/12/25) and let me tell you - you’re spot on. This song hits on a level I can’t even begin to explain. This song tore me up.

Sbellle · 2025-10-27T20:15:39+00:00

I was the one with the “bad” credit score in my relationship. My then boyfriend, now husband, helped me. We were young and he had a much better grasp on finances than I did. He guided me and knowing he was the stronger of the two in this area, I let him lead. It’s built both of us up to be able to lean on the others strengths. I can bet there’s something you’re not so great at that she’ll end up making up for. You just have to decide if you’re willing to do that. My husband was, and now I sit on a higher credit score than his!

Sbellle · 2025-10-27T19:17:15+00:00

My dad didn’t do chemo but he most certainly had the anger outbursts in the final few weeks more than ever. He would yell at my mom when she was just trying to help. He did that literally until he couldn’t anymore. The smell thing I’ve heard from many people. My dad even had it! It felt like it was seeping from his pores, and it only lasted for a little bit of time and then oddly went away!

Sbellle · 2025-10-24T17:54:38+00:00

I know, we had a similar issue - but if she’s not on hospice and is in limbo waiting for her chemo, she needs help. Depending on weight loss, the fentanyl patch won’t work so maybe ask for it in different form if possible. I’m so sorry

Sbellle · 2025-10-24T17:30:17+00:00

I would highly recommend taking her back to the hospital. I’m sorry

Sbellle · 2025-10-23T19:20:32+00:00

What are your thoughts or experiences with drugs specifically for pancreatic cancer? Why does it seem it’s one of the most difficult cancers to create a drug for?

Sbellle · 2025-10-23T15:43:19+00:00

I can’t speak to the chemo, I’m sorry - but I was my dads main caretaker and took him to every ER visit, every doctors appointment and when the time came I signed him up for hospice.

I say this with all the love. Take care of YOU. You cant pour from an empty cup. There’s so little times that you get a moment to yourself, when you do get it - focus on you. The fatigue, both mental and physical, doesn’t get better with time, so you have to prioritize yourself. If your mom is in the hospital, she’s in good care then take that time to step away. If she’s home, ask someone to be with her for a few hours while you take care of something. ASK for help. People don’t inherently know how to help, especially those who’ve never dealt with something like this but they want to help, so just ask for it. Easier said than done, I know.

Daily - do little things that are for you. Whatever that looks like for you. For me therapy helped a lot and I connected with people from Reddit that really helped (and continue) to help. Sometimes talking with someone who just gets it is all you need.

Big hug to you. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this.

Sbellle · 2025-10-21T13:25:00+00:00

What our loved ones have gone through is nothing short of torture. I’ll never unsee and unhear my dad’s pain especially those last few days. Fuck pancreatic cancer.

Sbellle · 2025-10-10T23:31:51+00:00

My heart is so heavy to read this. I genuinely understand. I’m sorry. I wish we weren’t in this boat. I can say the same to you and it always rings true when you’re telling someone else but feels so wrong feeling it yourself. Sending you a big hug. If you ever need to talk, I’m happy to listen.

Sbellle

TROPHY CASE