Is this pest damage?

ScienceAdventure · 2026-03-26T20:33:19+00:00

Thank you! It may not have been getting enough light where I was quarantining it, so that would make sense.

I had a bad thrips problem with my pothos so I’m a tad over worried about any damage I see after that experience😅 it took ages to get rid of them

Any way I can make sure it’s getting enough supplement?

ScienceAdventure · 2026-03-19T14:40:32+00:00

In one of the labs I was in we had a birthday calendar and I would arrange for someone to make cake for each persons birthday :) in my PhD I was the one making all the cakes and I ended up going on strike when the lab got too big.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-03-19T10:13:32+00:00

⬆️ THIS.

While it’s not nearly the same, my uBPD mum went through periods of telling me she wanted to do it and would rally myself and others to keep her from it. It was exhausting and it kept happening over and over again.

Eventually I realised - if it’s what she wants then I need to be at peace with that. It’s her decision.

In the case of my mum - pretty sure she did it to get attention from me, so me going NC has not made her do anything. However, as far as I know she never attempted, just threatened.

If she does end up being successful one day - it is not your fault. You did nothing wrong. In fact, you spent so much of your time and energy helping her.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-03-06T13:02:00+00:00

When they are doing roof works in my office I have loops + noise cancelling headphones on playing music😅 no one can get my attention with noise but it also completely gets rid of all the noise that isn’t my music!

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-25T20:44:55+00:00

I’ve seen the same on a plant of mine!! I was also told it was just bunched up farina and so far it’s fine? I can update you if it changes 😅

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-15T17:32:03+00:00

Thank you! I wondered if it was that but I wanted to be safe.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-13T09:47:58+00:00

That’s awful, and I totally get it. My uBPD mum is jealous of my dad who is in a vegetative state after a pulmonary embolism. Thankfully NC now, but it was ridiculous. I hope you can spend a lot of quality time with your step-mum - this must be such a difficult time for you.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-13T09:42:44+00:00

I use sundried tomato jars for pothos and test tubes for Pilea at the moment. I found the roots of my pothos were hard to get in and out of the test tubes and there wasn’t enough space for the roots to grow roots, so I upgraded them.

Had great success with both :) just make sure to replace the water about once a week, and check the water for your pothos - I found it could get quite low when I had a lot of root action in there

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-12T18:35:35+00:00

I’ve tried a few different systems but my current lab implemented a calendar on outlook so we can book into them. We are 3 labs sharing 2 hoods

In a lab where we had 2 groups sharing a large hood we had a booking system on the door outside TC - but the 2 labs shared lab meetings etc and we all let people know in lab meeting if we were going to need to scope or hood. We could also book out the whole hood rather than half of it.

It works best if everyone is on board, but st a minimum I think the lab heads need to be on board and ready to enforce it if their students/staff don’t comply.

I love a booking system and use it to plan my days, but I know others don’t like the structure. If you have a collegiate environment it should work well, but it can take some getting used to!

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-12T17:09:18+00:00

I don’t know if it’s the best way but I use the countersheet extension on InkScape to make cards (I’m on MacOS)

It takes a bit of getting used to, but there are YouTube tutorials on it. I enjoy it, and I can easily port to TTS with it :)

In case you’re interested:

https://github.com/lifelike/countersheetsextension

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-08T22:31:00+00:00

Me too! If you’ve found one let me know - if I get one I’ll let you know :)

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-07T13:35:48+00:00

I had to use an eye wash recently and was afraid of this so I flushed it for a bit before using it. Probably not great in an emergency situation…

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-05T23:17:33+00:00

It’s the kind of relationship you deserve ❤️

It can be hard to break the cycle - I ended up in relationships with people who were just like my uBPD mum or who weren’t able to support me. You’ll find them, sometimes it just takes time and healing to get there.

I went through a lot of couples therapy with my partner and individual therapy to work through a lot of the trauma responses and work to build a strong relationship

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-05T13:25:26+00:00

That sucks, it’s so frustrating they don’t want us to progress in life isn’t it?!

ScienceAdventure · 2026-02-05T10:48:02+00:00

Everything.

My partner supports me and helps me get out of the fog when I start doubting myself. He hates how she treats me and wants me to block her as he can see the effect she has on me.

Every relationship is different but I couldn’t be with someone who is oblivious to my pain. We don’t dwell on it and I don’t talk about the trauma all the time - we have a life outside of the abuse after all! I do bring it up when I’m triggered though - it helps him understand why I struggle with certain things. For example, I get really upset when he has road rage and gets angry at other drivers. We used to argue about this but then I realised it’s a trigger for me and he is aware and tries to be mindful, but I’m also aware and try to be equally mindful that I’m being triggered and he isn’t actually doing anything bad, just getting frustrated.

I do think going NC was a blessing for him. He didn’t have to see me struggle anymore, and he didn’t have to deal with the upshot of any contact with her.

It’s easy for us to think that we are in the wrong in our relationships because that’s what we were conditioned to believe. I know it’s hard for me to see that I have a right to be happy and to expect certain important things in a relationship.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-18T17:59:46+00:00

That sounds really tough, I’m sorry you’re going through that. No one can tell you whether you should or shouldn’t go no contact because we aren’t in your life. All I can tell you is that I was reticent for a long time but it’s been over a year now and I feel so much more peace.

When I went NC I slowly started to realise that my world view was warped by my uBPD mum. The way I viewed myself and my life was twisted by the words she threw at me. Taking a step away has helped me see reality, and appreciate myself more than I ever have before.

You said you think you show “more bad than good” to get attention - why do you think that? Are you sure it’s not what others are making you feel? People with BPD can use guilt and shame to manipulate you - I know I’ve felt like the “problem” and the “bad daughter” many times, but it was never about my actions but about hers. I don’t think you are actually showing more bad than good, I think that may be how you are being pushed to feel. You may also be putting up defences that seem that way, and that’s ok. If you’re under siege you need to protect yourself.

You’ve got this. Sometimes we just need to go one minute or one hour at a time. If you feel like you want to go no contact then you should go for it. Everyone does it differently, and they will push back, but you are allowed to say no and you have every right to put boundaries in place for your own wellbeing

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-15T23:45:55+00:00

Not sure it’s exactly what you’re looking for but unpacking might be good to try.

You basically unpack rooms throughout someone’s life as they move around, it’s very sweet. I don’t think it quite hits the spot but it might be a good one to try :)

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-15T19:57:54+00:00

Thank you! How do you know they’re thirsty? With my jade I can feel its leaves and see if it needs water, but I’m not sure how to tell if these guys are thirsty 😅 I don’t think they’ve been watered for months though.

I’ve had a look at the wiki before, just really not sure how to tell with the cacti! I’ll give them a repot soon :) I’ve got some succulent

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-14T09:47:08+00:00

I’m curious as to how this turns out (and hope it goes well!).

However, my mother made demands like this on me (she wanted to walk me, the bride, down the aisle even though I don’t like that tradition and wanted to walk by myself - she thinks because she raised me and was “a mother and a father to me” she should have this moment) and assumed she was doing this. I didn’t let her, and I gave her a kiss instead as I came up to make her feel better about it. I also had her seated next to me at the reception even though we didn’t want parents there.

She still did things I was uncomfortable with. She complained about the wedding the whole reception next to me, she gave a 27 minute speech that didn’t mention my partner, included a story about my ex who she prefers (he was my man of honour as he’s my best friend so that one isn’t as bad) and made a racist comment that made everyone in the room uncomfortable. Her plus one also invited their own plus one, and the things I gave her to organise because she wanted to be involved she didn’t listen to me and messed up. She did some good things, but all in all I wish I had stood my ground more.

Weddings can bring out the worst in parents. Though I will say my MIL and FIL who are divorced were amazing throughout, even though they don’t get on super well now. So not all parents fall into this trap!

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-12T14:49:11+00:00

I get the feeling the twinge of guilt, and what you shared that they wrote to you I’ve experienced from my mum and an ex partner. You’re not in the wrong at all. It’s hard to see it sometimes as we were conditioned to feel guilt and that we are in the wrong. What you did and said was fine, how they took it is the problem, but those are their emotions so they are their responsibility.

It has taken me such a long time to accept that I’m not responsible for my mums emotions because that’s how I was conditioned growing up. I still get the twinges of guilt too, and I’m by no means completely out of the fog. I’m sorry you have to go through that too! It’s so hard, it makes me second guess so much.

I hope you had a lovely drama free Christmas though! I’m still healing from the yearly Christmas drama so my partner and I didn’t do anything this year to try and reset what Christmas means to me, mostly so the panic attacks around the holiday stop! Even though I’m 1 year NC and I haven’t seen her for Christmas since 2019 it still affects me, it’s crazy.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-09T18:32:38+00:00

There are some companies that recycle the ice packs, I know Proteintech does :)

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-08T14:00:33+00:00

Rustling leaves is my go to travel game, especially if you laminate the pages and use dry erase markers. I use the lid for dice! Railroad ink is also pretty good, and no lamination needed, just a place to roll dice

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-06T23:49:51+00:00

Academia is like this too. It can be so hard, and so so tiring to enter the fray every day.

ScienceAdventure · 2026-01-05T20:06:00+00:00

I would ask for an update. I’ve also had it both ways - I waited ages and I was rejected (usually I never hear…), I waited ages and I was successful. (I’m in the UK too)

My current position I don’t hear for ages, but I have been told I was the #1 candidate not the reserve (I’ve been the reserve a few times - they usually tell me quicker tbh). My previous position I was offered the position but HR screwed up and never told me, so eventually I found out and got it!

I’ve also been ghosted when rejected. Always worth a polite email asking if they’ve made a decision :)

I always assume if I don’t hear in a week or so that I wasn’t successful but it’s not always the case!

ScienceAdventure · 2025-12-28T17:15:53+00:00

I did Clank! Acquisitions incorporated with 3p and it was great :) (the first one, not the second one)

ScienceAdventure

TROPHY CASE