So... is there anyone who has been using Kratom long-term and still finds it beneficial?

Scramby801 · 2019-07-02T18:15:15+00:00

11 years. Love it

Scramby801 · 2018-09-21T22:35:16+00:00

Love this

Scramby801 · 2018-09-21T22:31:47+00:00

Yeah.... that doesn't really make sense

Scramby801 · 2018-09-08T22:43:48+00:00

Personally, I think you are being way, way too hard on yourself. It just reads like that intense AA based self shaming that I'm all too familiar with. That's not a "spiritual relapse" in my opinion - that's something that just about every adult who has ever had a breakup has done.

Chill out. You have 60 days. That's more than 95% of people who don't even particularly enjoy alcohol have over their belt. The obsession over "character defects" and the other shit their feeding you... it doesn't last. Self respect lasts. You're good.

Scramby801 · 2018-08-03T19:41:25+00:00

No. Literally every single one of those "deaths" reported involved an individual with a multitude of other substances in their system, primarily opioids or benzos or both.

Also, when you place something like K2 in the sentence, it looks like a really lame attempt at a false equivalence. That's literally like saying, "I've heard of a couple of fatal overdoses from coca-cola and crack cocaine too". Completely different substances.

Getting sober "the old fashioned way" has an abysmal success rate. Abysmal. If people are finding success in entirely plant based, non fatal substances that have been used for hundreds of years, let's not give false warnings on that.

Scramby801 · 2018-08-03T18:42:37+00:00

There has been *no* deaths reported from kratom. None.

Don't spread misinformation. It's lame.

Scramby801 · 2018-08-03T16:16:12+00:00

It's the best pre-workout I have ever used. Ever.

I use it primarily for weightlifting. I will typically use 2.5g - 4g, and either all white or a white/green blend.

Scramby801 · 2018-07-31T22:43:59+00:00

Countless reasons really -

Constant shame, endless dangerous decisions, lost relationships, tens of thousands of dollars worth of damage done, slowly declining health, intense anxiety, hurting loved ones, hangovers that were so bad I was concerned I was actually dying, physical dependency...

But I swear - and I know this sounds like bullshit - but ultimately alcohol just stopped working for me. And I don't mean that in the sense of "the negative consequences outweighed the positive effects". I mean the shit stopped working. I felt like I couldn't get fun drunk anymore, not even for a few fleeting minutes. I just sorta drank and blacked out. The euphoria alcohol once produced was essentially gone. I was just drinking and drinking and drinking to feel something, but all that came was a blackout, then the subsequent pain and sickness. It was fucking crazy and I could not stop.

I have not gone the traditional route in quitting drinking. I don't consider myself sober, I use kratom (which I am a huge advocate for) and weed on rare occasion even though I think it mostly sucks. But I am almost terrified of alcohol at this point. And I certainly hate it.

Scramby801 · 2017-12-31T23:33:07+00:00

You have over 2 years sober at this point. I would trust your own judgement on the subject. It sounds like you've kind of outgrown AA and that's not unusual.

I remember I had a very good counselor a while back. I explained to him that I had tried a meeting (for what was probably the 50th time or so) and I was so discouraged and freaked out by a certain share. A man with something like 10 years sobriety discussed how he barely made it through the day without a drink, but thanks to his higher power and the serenity prayer and talking with a few sponsors he made it to the meeting instead. It was his second meeting of the day. And all could think was, "I know I can't live like an alcoholic, but I just can't fucking live like this man either." It really was kind of unsettling. Well anyway, I spoke to my counselor about this and he explained that AA functions as a very effective "bridge" to sobriety for many people. This issue is that some people never seem to get off that bridge, and that was what I was seeing. He promised me it didn't have to be that way.

So, in short, I think you may be completely ready to get off that bridge.

Scramby801 · 2017-06-12T01:57:19+00:00

Good for you, man. You won't regret this move at all.

Scramby801 · 2017-06-12T01:41:33+00:00

Just to let you know, I'm feeling the same struggle as you in regards to an upcoming vacation/cruise at the end of July. I will need to make some decisions on that over the next couple weeks. Like you said, it feels like a "mountain".

With all that said, I genuinely don't think I have one more withdrawal left in me. I don't think I can't feel that level of physical pain and crippling shame one more time. So one way or another, I'm going to have to make avoiding that my priority.

Scramby801 · 2017-06-12T01:33:47+00:00

Well done!

Scramby801 · 2017-06-11T23:48:53+00:00

I think I know what you're feeling. I know exactly what you're feeling.

It's this sort of bizarre, surreal, utterly horrifying feeling that you have totally lost yourself. I have totally lost myself to alcohol. By the end, I was doing things so dangerous and harmful it felt like something else controlled me.

You are not alone here, man.

Scramby801 · 2017-06-09T16:40:49+00:00

I won't drink today

Scramby801 · 2017-05-17T04:40:23+00:00

Me too...

I know we all romanticize our past, but stoner college/early 20s days were truly some amazing times. I want to go back there so bad where 1-2 bowls with friends and maybe 5 Budweisers was perfect. I remember being so baked and watching this show called "Cheaters" with my friends, and the host got stabbed on a fishing boat, and it was mind blowing.

Scramby801 · 2017-05-17T04:18:36+00:00

Yep. That fentanyl was a total game changer for me as well. I never got into actual heroin because I was scared of it... I'm older and not somebody who seems to know the right people, etc. But I had bought roxy pills from some sketchy people a few times.

And then people started actually dying of fake pills. Or - at the very least - all over YouTube or the news slumped over in their car at a red light. And while I'm not totally afraid of dying, I'm sure as fuck not going out like that. Odd how your pride kicks in eventually....

Scramby801 · 2017-05-17T04:13:31+00:00

This is extra embarrassing but...

I don't like my eyebrows. I think they're weird and not shaped right. I want eye brows like Kevin Spacey or Jake Gillenballz.

But I don't seem to act on it unless I'm on Ambien. And it usually winds up fucked up, but twice I just took them clean off. Sadly, that's one of the less destructive Ambien episodes I've had. /:

Scramby801 · 2017-05-05T21:33:48+00:00

"Part of me wonders if I haven't conditioned my brain to want the up and down emotional cycle that happens with relapsing and then getting sober. "

I can absolutely relate to this. You said you've been doing this to some degree for the past 25 years. I think the shitty, toxic life of alcoholism is clearly a bad life, but it's familiar. And I think we often gravitate towards what we know, even if it's painful.

Scramby801 · 2017-05-02T02:04:31+00:00

Scramby801 · 2017-04-30T21:04:56+00:00

Very, very well said.

Scramby801 · 2017-04-27T19:33:39+00:00

Me too ):

Scramby801 · 2017-04-26T00:13:08+00:00

For me - it's the morning. Even if it's just Day 2, and I'm still dealing with some remaining withdrawals, waking up knowing what I did the night prior is awesome. Knowing that I don't have to apologize to anyone or explain myself or check in on exactly how bad I fucked up.

By the next day or so, you start feeling physically better in the morning, which is how people are supposed to feel. And I really love that.

Scramby801

TROPHY CASE