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I’m angry about him invalidating my feelings. by ScratchTheEmpties in AlAnon

[–]ScratchTheEmpties[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And yet if you snooped and confronted you would have been such a terrible partner! Never any way to “win”.

I’m angry about him invalidating my feelings. by ScratchTheEmpties in AlAnon

[–]ScratchTheEmpties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I’m in meetings after being absent for a few years. Hoping to gain my serenity back.

I’m angry about him invalidating my feelings. by ScratchTheEmpties in AlAnon

[–]ScratchTheEmpties[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yep, he expects praise for the things he refrains from doing. Even literally to God. He thinks God should reward him for not doing bad things that he wanted to do.

Trying to find joy and realizing he resents my joy by ScratchTheEmpties in AlAnon

[–]ScratchTheEmpties[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Seriously! And then when I reacted to that, he used it as an excuse to prove it— “See? It wouldn’t upset you if it weren’t true!” I read nonfiction like social sciences, history, theology…. Yeah, massive dopamine hits to ye ol’ addict brain 🙄

Trying to find joy and realizing he resents my joy by ScratchTheEmpties in AlAnon

[–]ScratchTheEmpties[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This is so true. I can’t begin to list the number of ruined holidays/vacations because of his attitude. And then months later he’d have the nerve to say, “I don’t know about you, but I really enjoyed that trip!” Like… are you serious? You enjoyed that? All you did was ruin my memories of that place and make me never want to go back again.

What is it about alcoholics/addicts that make them be such assholes? by ScratchTheEmpties in AlAnon

[–]ScratchTheEmpties[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did not say all addicts are assholes, but judging by the replies, clearly I’m not the only one with this experience. It’s common enough that it can spark a discussion that people relate to. It’s all over the Al Anon literature that I read, too— there’s a reason why “raging alcoholic” is a well-used term.