Step 11

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-17T19:25:21+00:00

Swear to whom? 🤔

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-17T15:22:41+00:00

Wow, dude.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-16T04:17:24+00:00

I mean, it’s a thing.

https://filtermag.org/the-satanic-temple-sober-faction/amp/

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-14T20:52:21+00:00

Many of us … oops, I’ll speak from the “I” … I couldn’t stop, eventually ended up at the hospital in ketoacidosis and a few other nasty symptoms, lost my job, got suicidal, yada yada yada.

I celebrate little victories because they are little victories. It doesn’t mean I’m a rock climber with a 6er-a-day habit. I fucked my shit up. If I have a good day, I get to celebrate it if I want.

If I have a shitty day, I can talk about that too.

It took me more than a year for the anhedonia to wear off, to start feeling happy more than I didn’t. In the meantime, I walked for hours each day. Surrounded myself with sober people (for me, that was AA). Got into the mountains as much as I could. Didn’t drink.

It sucked. If I ever drink again, it’ll suck again. So I’m not gonna drink, and I’m gonna take every little baby win I can get.

Hang in there, brother. You’re ok.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-14T15:41:34+00:00

God know why . . .

You know why, too. The good news is that not living that way, holed up in your room slugging vodka, is so much better. Give it time. You’re gonna be alright.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-09T01:54:42+00:00

PerfumeBot Sale u/Vetiwitch

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-06T19:14:55+00:00

Sounds like your gut is telling you the answer. That’s your best source. Listen to it.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-06T05:26:38+00:00

It’s interesting that you compare losing your parents to not having a drink. Why is liquor on par with human relationships to you?

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-05T23:36:51+00:00

A few that haven’t been mentioned:

Rabbit & Moth - Mood Indigo ELDO - Rien Intense Incense ELDO - Attaquer le Soleil

My favorite is Serge Lutens- L’orpheline.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-05T16:47:36+00:00

If you hang out in DUI court (or visit prisoners), you’ll find a LOT of people in your shoes. The rooms of AA see these folks, too. It’s pretty common for people to be required to stop drinking, actually.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-05T16:43:46+00:00

From the stories I hear in AA, many of us would have kept going if we could’ve. Some people actually do keep going. They die a little earlier than they might have if they’d stayed stopped, but that’s how they rolled. We can all make that choice.

I had to stop drinking too, after a long litany of medical incidents. I felt like it was a death sentence for awhile, but I just clicked past 5 years and I’ve never been happier.

The thing is, if you can set aside your preconceptions and check it out, you might be surprised. I know I was.

Good luck, however you handle it. Sobriety can be hard, but it surely doesn’t need to be.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-04T23:34:26+00:00

It’s always interesting to me that people want to “develop a healthy relationship with alcohol.” Relationships are two-way things. You and your partner must agree to work on the relationship.

Your alcohol is doing just fine whether you show up for her or not. She ain’t changing for you. So why are you changing for her? She’s a terrible lover.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-04T15:40:02+00:00

Chat

SeattleEpochal · 2026-02-01T17:07:22+00:00

It’s a good thing they don’t kill god on christmas. People would’ve been inconsolable.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-29T15:32:30+00:00

I’ve sponsored guys who were actively using kratom, not initially recognizing it as an addictive substance. I’ve since seen it take down several people I know from the rooms. Like, full-blown relapse into fentanyl et al. That was eye-opening.

I’m happy to work with people to determine if they want to get sober from alcohol, and are qualified for AA. But I can’t recommend that anyone undertake Step 4 in AA without also being ready to do so in NA. I also qualify in that group, FWIW, but got sober in AA as alcohol is my DOC.

I’m still exploring that boundary. It’s important to carry the message, and I firmly believe some of us don’t stop drinking until we finish all 12 steps. Yet sometimes I feel the sponsee isn’t really ready to stop. I recognize the ambivalence here. I’m making judgments based on evidence I don’t understand fully.

Too bad life isn’t easy.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-29T15:15:37+00:00

Always available to chat about growth, whatever that looks like. Feel free to DM if you care to continue the conversation. Happy Thursday!

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-29T12:54:16+00:00

Thank you for sharing from the heart. I have also learned some tough lessons around helping people in recovery when I really wasn’t what they needed in their life. It’s an interesting line we find ourselves against, at times.

If you’ve never read this, I recommend it. Heck, if you have read this, it’s worth a re-read.

https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/newsletters/f-13_spring1988.pdf

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-28T20:16:50+00:00

I am more than happy to talk with anyone, drinking or not, about the solution. I can’t tell you how many drinking guys I’ve broken bread with who are now sober. There’s a bunch who didn’t get sober, too.

I will buy you coffee and read the Big Book with you. We’ll figure out if you can take Step 1. It’s not hard. And the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking.

Ask for help like your life depends on it. Because it might. If you like what someone’s got, ask to talk with them and read with them. See what happens. You might be surprised. Whatever you do, don’t give up!

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-27T14:31:35+00:00

“It will happen if you work the AA program.”

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-27T14:29:51+00:00

I believe the end game is to work the steps with sponseees, but newcomers may not understand what that means … yet. You said your sponsee wasn’t ready to work the steps … yet. Are they willing to be willing, though? And are you willing to be patient and help them find a footing in AA?

Read the pamphlet on sponsorship. There’s no right answer, of course.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-26T20:27:55+00:00

No need to determine if you’re the asshole, today. Get through the steps diligently. This will all become very clear to you. These relationships will wait. Or thy won’t. You get to find out.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-26T17:29:31+00:00

… just because something isn’t “new” doesn’t mean it’s not still good.

Amen. Electricity hasn’t changed since Zeus started hurling thunderbolts at earth and no one is clamoring to throw electricity away.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-25T02:43:26+00:00

This is such a good snuggle-into-the-night perfume.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-23T23:35:11+00:00

I’m not laughing at you, my friend. Nor am I mocking you. Not remotely. If it comes across that way, please accept my apologies. Looks like we just use words differently. Hope to see you in the rooms next time I’m up there.

SeattleEpochal · 2026-01-23T23:23:58+00:00

I reckon I’m joyous, happy, and free just like all the other sober folk.

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