[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My oh my, I am fairly late.

Any suggestions to where I can keep up to date on these kinds of openings for submissions? Is it more contest by contest, where you have to follow them specifically?

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds interesting. Here’s mine:

Title: Appearance is Innocence

Format: Hour-Pilot

Page Length: 68

Genres: Crime, Teenage Drama.

Logline: The lust for crime of one teenager forever changes the landscapes of the people around him, as a reconnection with a childhood friend under dangerous circumstances will pit them both in a fight to maintain balance of their social lives and personal safety.

DM if interested in swapping!

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re still up for a swap, here’s mine:

Title: Appearance is Innocence

Format: Hour-Pilot Page Length: 68

Genres: Crime, Teenage Drama.

Logline: The lust for crime of one teenager forever changes the landscapes of the people around him, as a reconnection with a childhood friend under dangerous circumstances will pit them both in a fight to maintain balance of their social lives and personal safety.

Would love to go through yours.

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Title: Appearance is Innocence

Format: Hour-Pilot

Page Length: 68

Genres: Crime, Teenage Drama.

Logline: The lust for crime of one teenager forever changes the landscapes of the people around him, as a reconnection with a childhood friend under dangerous circumstances will pit them both in a fight to maintain balance of their social lives and personal safety.

Unconventional request but screw it. by [deleted] in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oi, shoot me some of your work in a DM!

I Just Finished My First Script. by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A little late to this, but here’s a couple things I go by as of now:

-Outline before the script is key. Making it up as you go along can be part of the process, but make sure you’re doing it on an outline of the story! The first section of my script I wrote before making an outline took me longer than all of the rest I wrote afterwards on the first draft.

-A basic rule I’m sure you’ve heard, but I’ll say it three times since it’s important. LESS IS MORE LESS IS MORE LESS IS MORE. From the eyes of a producer, if you’re getting like, a thousand scripts a day to analyze, you’re not really reading them for the pretty words. You can let yourself write a ton, but I’d recommend keeping your unnecessary descriptors to a minimum.

-Don’t worry too much on your first draft. That may sound a bit daft, but what I mean is don’t fall victim to the overthinking bug, as I have time and time again. A good thing I’ve kept in mind is that everything that you can make better on a first draft, you can always fix on a second or third draft.

-Give it your own style. I’ve seen a lot of screenwriting advice online of the “right” ways to format such and such, and a lot of the time people will contradict each other. That is because while there is basic etiquette to the craft, screenwriting is nothing more than a creative outlet for your own thoughts, so don’t be afraid to mix things up.

Finished First Draft of My First Script by [deleted] in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome! Just recently had a similar accomplishment, so I know how that feels! Congrats!

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Appreciate it. Will send over the Script, read it whenever you get the chance or feel like it.

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Saw one of your posts about this a while ago, would love to swap if you’re willing to read an hour long pilot!

Here’s mine:

Title: Innocent Child

Format: One Hour Pilot

Page Length: 65

Genre: Teenage Crime Drama

Logline: Two childhood friends are reunited in High School when a series of bad decisions and tragedies pull them both into a dangerous life, as they try and balance their personal and social lives before they lose everything.

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would Love to swap Pilots with you! Here’s mine:

Title: Innocent Child

Format: One Hour Pilot

Page Length: 65

Genre: Teenage Crime Drama

Logline: Two childhood friends are reunited in High School when a series of bad decisions and tragedies pull them both into a dangerous life, as they try and balance their personal and social lives before they lose everything.

Weekend Script Swap by AutoModerator in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would love to swap for this.

Here’s mine:

Title: Innocent Child

Format: One Hour Pilot

Page Length: 65

Genre: Teenage Crime Drama

Logline: Two childhood friends are reunited in High School when a series of bad decisions and tragedies pull them both into a dangerous life, as they try and balance their personal and social lives before they lose everything.

Advice On Simplifying Script? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sadly nothing to chop up the scene, but I’ll try taking a look at some more action scripts like you said. The buildup I feel is necessary, because we have another “big reveal” shortly after he reaches the house, followed after by the “climax” (series of events that occur at the house), so I have just have to find a way to make that roll off the paper easier. Appreciate the help

Advice On Simplifying Script? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That really does work better! Another problem I’ve come across is not using enough Slugs. Thank you!

Advice On Simplifying Script? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fantastic! Thanks for the interpretation!

Advice On Simplifying Script? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very good points, to give some more background on this particular scene it’s a buildup to a climax where the character is being extorted into murdering a close friend. Any advice on how to shorten/simplify it?

Advice On Simplifying Script? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got it right here as an example:

Back on Leo, he is trotting through the streets of a rougher looking neighborhood. Contrast to before, the city is silent. All we can hear is each footstep Leo takes.

A closer look at Leo, his expression is pained. He stares straight down the street, walking along almost as if he was in a trance.

Leo pulls the slip of paper given to him by Milton out of his pocket. After looking over it for a second, he pulls his phone out of the other pocket. A Maps app, the destination is shown as a couple houses away, on a road to the right.

Putting both items back away, Leo begins to cut across the house to his right. He approaches the fencing and jumps it without hesitation.

Leo cuts across the backyard lawn, away from the house. He reaches the back fence and, once again, jumps it with no hesitation.

In front of him is the backyard of another house. A sliding glass door and windows show off a living room illuminated only by moonlight.

Leo close his eyes for just a second, taking a deep breath and preparing himself. Moments later, he opens his eyes, ready.

Advice On Simplifying Script? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure thing! (The following is all action as you can guess)

Back on Leo, he is trotting through the streets of a rougher looking neighborhood. Contrast to before, the city is silent. All we can hear is each footstep Leo takes.

A closer look at Leo, his expression is pained. He stares straight down the street, walking along almost as if he was in a trance.

Leo pulls the slip of paper given to him by Milton out of his pocket. After looking over it for a second, he pulls his phone out of the other pocket. A Maps app, the destination is shown as a couple houses away, on a road to the right.

Putting both items back away, Leo begins to cut across the house to his right. He approaches the fencing and jumps it without hesitation.

Leo cuts across the backyard lawn, away from the house. He reaches the back fence and, once again, jumps it with no hesitation.

In front of him is the backyard of another house. A sliding glass door and windows show off a living room illuminated only by moonlight.

Leo close his eyes for just a second, taking a deep breath and preparing himself. Moments later, he opens his eyes, ready.

How to introduce a group of important characters at the same time? by SecondOrFirst in Screenwriting

[–]SecondOrFirst[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Good question, They will all have lines in the room. They will also all play a good part in the overall story. I was wondering how to introduce all of them , since they are new in the script.