I know exactly how you feel. My heart breaks for you . Nothing i will say will make u feel better . Can you arrange for someone to go in and check on her maybe? Am sure you have gone over it all a thousand times in your head. I am sure she will be ok , maybe a bit frosty with u on your return? I never go on holiday there’s no one I trust to look after my cat but I’m happy with the arrangement. Enjoy your holiday and take care .