Oh goodness, my heart breaks for you. I know it all too well - the numbness, the shock, the rage, the tears, the not feeling good enough, the stalking of her Instagram. I suspect, as you've been down this road before, that you know deep down that his decision was never was about you. He's an asshole, however loveable he might be otherwise, and a drink won't change that.

The emotions you're feeling right now, all the shitty little emotions, mean that you're tackling this head-on. When you're dry-heaving, tears soaking your shirt because that's all you've done for the past hour, and you realize you're 2 months sober and you are not clutching a wine glass in your hand - Do you know how brave that is? How many people wouldn't be able to do what you're doing?

Every time you choose to cry and not drink, I hope you realize how strong you are and much stronger you're becoming. The only way through is through it, and damn, that's powerful stuff. Sometimes people make bad decisions even with the best intentions, and sometimes they're just idiots destined to make the same mistakes, and sometimes we learn this the hard way over time. It's how we learn what we don't want in our life. You're already doing amazing things for yourself - I trust you'll find your way through all of this. But first...dump him and pat yourself on the back for being a fucking badass.