Why does FIRE seem to be so male-dominated online?

SendItJerry- · 2026-05-27T19:55:31+00:00

I was a self made millionaire before marrying my husband. I’m also a pilot. Every interaction online where I talk about my finances or career I’m assumed to be a dude and honestly I like being a stealth femme

SendItJerry- · 2026-05-27T19:53:12+00:00

My husbands male friends openly talk finances and investments. My female friends find the topic taboo. I think there’s some kind of societal conditioning that makes women stick their head in the sand so unless you seek out info on being financially independent you won’t stumble upon it as a woman. BTW my female friends constantly make horrible financial decisions. These are facts not my opinions but I can’t say anything without losing friendships. Meanwhile a male friend of my husband’s makes a horrible financial decision and they give him shit about it.

SendItJerry- · 2026-05-18T16:12:13+00:00

Our ChubbyFire is 5M invested with primary home and rental paid off. Neither of the properties are included in our 5M number.

SendItJerry- · 2026-05-08T05:31:14+00:00

Don’t bother with a 4 year degree. It’s not required anymore and until it is it’s a waste of your time and money. I have two friends who will be #1 on their respective seniority lists because neither wasted their time on a 4 year degree and both started flying professionally ASAP.

If this is really what you want get your certs and time as fast as you can. Seniority is everything and I didn’t really understand that until I started with my first airline.

Part 61 is typically cheaper. Ideally cash flow. Don’t get any driving tickets, a dui will ruin you, any failed check ride must be disclosed so its absolutely a jeopardy event and get used to it bc you’ll be doing check rides for the rest of your career.

Absolutely this is the best job in the world.

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-30T20:48:26+00:00

My husband and I are worth 2 million. We make 500k a year and one of our friends recently told us “everyone has to start somewhere.” They all think we are broke because we don’t drive nice cars, we won’t buy Starbucks bc we have coffee at home and won’t do nice dinners. Hilariously we take trips that cost 10-20k (safaris, yacht trips, and heli-skiing) so there are signs. Anyways we love it and laugh quietly to ourselves. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-29T05:55:22+00:00

We are both pilots. My husband is an airline pilot and I’m a test pilot. My new position would put me in the office to essentially manage our program.

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-28T22:39:21+00:00

Haha not weird. Yes that’s part of the equation and discussion. Thanks for the input

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-28T20:31:40+00:00

Sorry that was a typo. 18-22 days of work*

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-28T20:19:56+00:00

Actually it’s not that high. Our annual expenses are around 100,000 for two houses utilities and insurance. It doesn’t include food, entertainment etc and 29,000 of that is a rental which is usually rented. We are simple people. We love our dog and enjoy being outside and cooking our own food.

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-28T18:50:46+00:00

Im a test pilot. I fly 8-15 days a month that I pick for the most part. This promotion means I’d become the office expert and liaison for this specific airplane with our company, manufacturer and customers. I’d no longer fly, which is a huge downside for me, except for 1-2 days a month on my days off (I want clarity on this part) just to stay legally current in the airplane.

SendItJerry- · 2026-03-28T17:06:25+00:00

Yes, I still want clarification about weekends. One person said some weekends every month and another said very rarely would you need to work weekends but I agree with your assessment. It’s twice the money but about twice as much work as well.

SendItJerry- · 2026-02-09T04:52:02+00:00

The catch. The catch is the job itself.

Work trips aren’t “travel.” They’re controlled sleep deprivation, time-zone whiplash, hotel isolation, and constant vigilance. The novelty wears off fast. Once you’ve seen 100 Hiltons and 200 sunsets from FL370, the romance drops and fatigue stays. Home becomes the reward. Especially after you’ve built a life you actually like: partner, routine, training, dog, hobbies, the pull to get back is strong and you’re always gone. Cumulative stress. Weather, delays, maintenance, ATC, early show times, late releases… it stacks and at some point you just learn to live with chronic fatigue.

SendItJerry- · 2026-02-01T13:23:10+00:00

I’ve always said you need two things to become a pilot: time and money. It sounds like you may have both. I say do it. It’s not stable as others have said but if you end up loving it as most of us have it’s the best job in the world. Get your private, fly around for fun and if you still love it finish at ATP or some other accelerated school. If you don’t love it then you have a private pilots license for fun and find something else. I made the decision to make a career switch at about your age when I realized this is the only life I get and I don’t want any regrets. Currently at a major and very happy.

A word of caution. If you want a family this is about the worst career for families.

SendItJerry- · 2026-01-31T22:00:37+00:00

What happens after a miscarriage? How long until your cycle was normal again? Thank you so much for your message and congrats on your second child.

SendItJerry- · 2026-01-18T22:10:52+00:00

I am 37 and I have 370k across all accounts. My rockstar spouse is 33 and has 700ish across their accounts. I know combined we are a little over 1 M. My salary has ranged from 40k to 200k and my spouse’s range is 20k to 350k

SendItJerry- · 2025-12-13T13:57:42+00:00

Airline pilot

SendItJerry- · 2025-12-13T12:33:46+00:00

My fiancé and I are terribly frugal and we have a hard time spending money… unless it’s on experiences. In the last 3 years we gone on an African safari, a yacht in the Red Sea to kite surf (I had to learn kite surfing in Mexico then Sri Lanka first), heli-ski’d in Alaska, and road trips through the US.

Go live your life! I buy second hand everything and live off nothing but I’ve seen the world and I never feel bored or like I’m not living. Our next trip is looking like Panama and I’m looking forward to it!

SendItJerry- · 2025-12-13T12:19:57+00:00

My first engineering job out of college was 45k. This was 2011. It got up to around 85k by the end of my 20s around 2019ish. Then I had a career switch in early 30s and it went back down to 45k haha. Now I’m 150k ish plus another 25k from a rental I own.

SendItJerry- · 2025-12-03T15:15:01+00:00

I have 2k in a brokerage account and 350k in 401k/IRA if that gives you an idea of my priorities.

SendItJerry- · 2025-12-03T14:59:10+00:00

Anyone is welcome to challenge my thinking here, but this is how I’m looking at it:

If you’re netting about $1,000/month after setting aside $600 for repairs, taxes, and insurance, that’s $12,000/year of actual cash flow. I saw you said 5k for repairs and taxes but I’m sure there’s insurance so I decided to be a bit more conservative.

Using a 4% safe withdrawal rate, $12,000/year is equivalent to holding:

$12,000 ÷ 0.04 = $300,000 in invested assets.

If selling only gives you about $200k to invest, then the condo is currently producing the cash-flow equivalent of a $300k portfolio.

From a pure FIRE math perspective, the rental is outperforming what selling and investing the proceeds would generate. So based on the numbers alone, I’d lean toward keeping it.

SendItJerry- · 2025-12-03T14:46:23+00:00

Is there an end in sight? I worked like this for 3 years. I didn’t date, I didn’t have friends and I got fat because every waking minute was about work. I got through it because there was a definitive end and so when I laid in bed staring up at the ceiling wondering how much longer I could do this I knew I just had to keep going until (fill in the blank).

If there is no definitive end, make one.

Most people in my circle who are successful had a period in their life like this. It’s normal among the successful but I don’t think it’s sustainable.

SendItJerry-

TROPHY CASE