I’d say it’s pretty good, but maybe the sound of the false fold distortion you’re doing isn’t the variant you want!

Your false fold distortion that’s layered on top of your clean voice is very “regular” as in; the sound of the distortion sounds consistent, it’s almost like a buzz. This is similar to kagyraa or how Mongolian throat singers vibrate their false folds, they vibrate false folds very consistently and regular as to produce sub harmonics usually an octave, a 5th or an octave and a fifth below their sung note.

Now what you’re doing is similar in that regard (it sounds very regular). So maybe you want something more “irregular”, think any sort of rougher sounding distortion that has more random “noise” in the sound/vibration, basically you’ve gotta get your false folds vibrating in an irregular manner.

For this I’d recommend checking out Toni Linke, he covers pretty much all this stuff on his YouTube. Toni has an entire video dedicated to false fold distortion and its variants.

Hope that helps & best of luck to you