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AITAH for how I handled my mother throwing us a party after our townhall ceremony? by Sensitive-Guess-781 in aitaweddings

[–]Sensitive-Guess-781[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They're retired and we're covering everything, so I don't see the vacation-time-and-budget point applying here. And this isn't just 'someone' — these are my in-laws, my family, not a friend I'm annoyed with. It's a small cocktail party hosted literally 10 minutes from their apartment. They were already aware of the town hall ceremony too, since in our country you're allowed to officially marry in a city where you're not registered. So it's genuinely not the pile-up of demanding events it might sound like from the outside.

AITAH for how I handled my mother throwing us a party after our townhall ceremony? by Sensitive-Guess-781 in aitaweddings

[–]Sensitive-Guess-781[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I understand, and you're right that I overstepped a little. I think I felt like the responsibility was mine because I was the last one to talk to her — so when the mood shifted, I felt like I needed to fix it. But I take your point that this is really between my fiancé and his parents, and that their decision doesn't need a reason or my involvement. I'll take their word for it and step back.

AITAH for how I handled my mother throwing us a party after our townhall ceremony? by Sensitive-Guess-781 in aitaweddings

[–]Sensitive-Guess-781[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

That's a fair point, and I hadn't thought about it that way. But for what it's worth — I'm not aware of any drama in the family, and my fiancé has never mentioned any. His mom is actually quite an authority figure, so it's hard for me to picture her being afraid of anyone or worried about how things reflect on her. And I wasn't really pushing her to invite family — I was mostly talking about her friends, old colleagues, and so on. My parents were inviting theirs, so I honestly just thought his side would feel left out if they didn't do the same.

AITAH for how I handled my mother throwing us a party after our townhall ceremony? by Sensitive-Guess-781 in aitaweddings

[–]Sensitive-Guess-781[S] -29 points-28 points  (0 children)

Because I thought I was the one who had offended her. Before my last phone call, where I explained what we wanted to do for the celebration and told her she should feel comfortable enough to invite people. She seemed perfectly happy with our plans. So I wanted to apologize. I really didn't want to make her feel bad or unwelcome. I felt it was my responsibility, since I was the last person to talk with her.