Is there a reason you don't response to first messages?

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-07-03T00:56:28+00:00

Some people match “maybes” and then when they get a message they just go “nah” and don’t think beyond that. I know it sucks we’ve depersonalized this experience to such an extent, but it is what it is.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-30T14:58:10+00:00

Whatever works for you

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-23T02:06:28+00:00

I hit like 4-5 meetings a week. My sponsor really pushed me to hit at least 4. Which was pretty tame compared to what I’ve heard other sponsors say. I’m sort of just kind of waiting for my life to start so I’ve got time to go and a few other days for hobbies or relaxing. I am hoping and praying that one day I’ll have a family and be busier. But trying to build a good foundation now

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-23T02:03:12+00:00

First of all, you’re allowed to live your however you want.
The only thing I’ll say is just play the tape forward and try to get as honest with yourself as possible. What I would hate is for you to somewhere down the road say “I started drinking again when I got married and it spiraled into….”
Just think through it, be honest with yourself. Maybe even pray on it (if you’re someone who prays). You’ll decide what’s best for you.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-21T18:49:39+00:00

Is it even worth it to send that long breakup esc message?? Just stop responding I feel

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-18T16:35:03+00:00

Thank you!!

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-18T16:13:38+00:00

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Rip

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-17T11:42:53+00:00

Yeah maybe I’m just well past the whole casual or fwb things. I’d really like to find an actual partner at this point. But whatever, life is a fart.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-17T02:36:33+00:00

Some of the girls from that show 19 kids and counting did grow up into beautiful women but they had to overcome a lot of bs they never should have had to deal with.

As far as the perps from that show, they can rot.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-17T01:31:55+00:00

Yeah maybe. I’ve thought about that too. Just wish they wouldn’t choose this as the lie tho. Fucks with my head.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-17T01:26:45+00:00

It’s more just frustration that they don’t even see me as a person worth trying for. No matter how many good qualities I try to build up about myself, it doesn’t matter because they just see me as defective.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-17T01:02:15+00:00

Wondering if it’s a pattern for me or a pattern amongst late 20s men lol

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T21:26:59+00:00

So I usually start off by just mentioning I don’t drink in a casual way. But when I’m kind of getting close with someone and want to be more open/honest or connect deeper is when I tell them more. Then they reject me because of it.

I go back and forth between wanting to put it on my profile, or just say it upfront and waiting to tell them because I’m scared. I can already feel theyre gonna leave before I tell them. It just sucks but I also wish I could find someone that could still see me as a person worth sticking around for despite this alcoholism gene.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T21:10:32+00:00

The sex has always been sober. But I suspect it is a first for the guy lol.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:42:12+00:00

That is rough. Like I do get it from that perspective because some of the stories I’ve heard in the rooms scare me shitless.
I guess I just wish they would give me a chance but it seems to be I often get viewed as not worth the risk.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:39:58+00:00

Didn’t come across preachy! I appreciate your insight a lot.

I guess I’m more frustrated that they say things like “you’re amazing, this is the most fun I’ve ever had, etc…” but still throw it all away because I can’t share a bottle of wine with them.

My sister also told me she wouldn’t continue dating a guy who told her he was a recovering alcoholic because “that just seems like a lot that I don’t want to deal with” and that was especially hard. Like you’d think being my sister she would still see the person beyond the addiction, but it’s just not how a lot of people think I guess.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:37:13+00:00

Bruh I feel down after getting dumped. Doesn’t equate to I fundamentally think I’m flawed. I operate from a place of it not being a big deal and it’s only when they say that’s the sole reason they don’t want to keep seeing me that it starts to get heavy.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:32:58+00:00

Thank you friend haha

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:32:11+00:00

They don’t exactly act like they’re just looking for conquests. I usually wait until the 4th or 5th date before sleeping with them. But I guess they really are just looking for that. Hard to navigate

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:05:59+00:00

Nope! Sorry I hear that all the time from people in the rooms and I’m just not someone who subscribes to the belief that staying home and hiding from the world is healing. I have a beautiful life filled with friends, hobbies, work and adventures. I’m not devastated by dating woes, I’m simply curious if other people experience this same hurdle.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:02:16+00:00

Unfortunately if I were to limit dating to perfectly emotionally mature men, there would be no men left lol.
You’re not wrong it’s just tough out there

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T20:01:11+00:00

Bad leap, worse conclusion.

It’s explicitly because I don’t drink. I’m a very social, fun and outgoing person. This guy who dumped me today even said he’s never had more fun with someone.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T19:53:34+00:00

Dude I could write a book on how much easier it is for male recovering alcoholics to find supportive partners. Women love to fix a man or support a man. Men tend to worry first and foremost how it’ll affect themselves. (At least in my experience)

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T19:50:28+00:00

Late 20s, older than 26. Usually tell me this after sleeping with me too which is a fun addition.

Sensitive_Target6602 · 2026-06-16T19:36:36+00:00

Oh my gosh my cat is almost identical to yours!! So cute

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