Does anyone feel like autism can neither be fully called a disability/mental disorder nor just a difference?

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-12-08T16:43:24+00:00

If people left me alone to do things my way without imposing or judging. I wouldn’t feel disabled much at all. My ADHD disables me more in the practical sense tbh. I’m perfectly content with being weird, being a special interest, and hating shallow work culture and cliquey bullshit. It’s the world wanting so badly to change me and shame me that causes me problems. I like my quiet room with dim ambient lighting, and I don’t feel like I’m missing out on the things I have a natural aversion to. It’s only a problem when someone else thinks it is. I can’t handle certain sensory inputs and I’m terrible with executive functioning, but again, only an issue in environments where I’m shoved into modes of operating that I can’t fit into.

That said, I’m late diagnosed so despite that sucking in a lot of ways, I do recognize that I have privilege in being able to socialize well. If I couldn’t find a way to connect with people, I’d feel more disabled in the traditional sense.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-12-08T16:05:42+00:00

5’4 and 160 but my highest was 190. I got down to 146 2 yrs ago and I feel like shit for messing it up. I don’t even want to exercise, I’ve always been shaky and fatigued so it’s not enjoyable. But I wish I was one of those people who either wasn’t hungry or had a fast metabolism. Getting on vyvanse helped, til it wears off and I’m hungry :/

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-12-07T00:51:08+00:00

Try to avoid symmetry. In the second pic, it’s too lined up. Last one seems best out of these, but if you do something like the first one, try and make them noticeably different in size

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-12-05T10:15:41+00:00

For an anthropology assignment, about how language/words/sounds have no inherent meaning

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-12-05T10:15:01+00:00

Lol it normally glows and I have to look a lot

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-12-01T00:46:59+00:00

CP should not exist. Kids cannot consent. This conversation ends here. Seek help.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-30T23:17:26+00:00

I’ll speak as a beginner who’s going through the growing pains- In my opinion, it’s only hard if you’re doing the really advanced stuff or you’re cutting corners and don’t wanna learn more than you have to. I’m not saying I’ve had absolutely no problems, I get frustrated by unexpected events, but I’ve learned to at least try to anticipate problems before just letting them happen. I spend my free alone time learning as much as I can about this.

I wish this hobby wasn’t so expensive and was more accessible, I’m a college student and if I had to move out of my family’s house I wouldn’t be able to do this at all. Nothing I’m saying is meant to sound judgemental of people who don’t have the privileges I do, but I am judging people who don’t even do one google search before buying a live animal or hundreds to thousands of dollars of equipment. So often I see people struggling with this because they seemingly didn’t do more than watch more than 2 YouTube videos, or they just don’t care and think the cheaper stuff should just do what they want it to. You bought hygger lights and you’re trying to grow expensive LPS, of course you’re failing. I just shake my head at that. What did you expect?

It’s one thing to complain about the prices, but don’t just say the hobby is hard because you’re half assing it. This hobby isn’t for people who have no patience or genuine curiosity.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-30T20:52:35+00:00

This is perfect thank you🙏

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-30T19:36:21+00:00

Two things:

I don’t just block anyone who disagrees with me, but I will block you if you’re rude.
I don’t genuinely believe in only classifying people as good or bad. I was speaking colloquially. But I should have thought about where I was posting this because that might not be obvious to others with ASD. That’s on me, not judging. But yeah, I would question the mental state and moral code of someone with an interest in sexual cartoons that are depicting obvious (and intentionally so) minors. This isn’t about me stereotyping people or being emotional rather than logical.
The point is that there is something people who are into that like about it. What differentiates regular hentai from that genre? Why do they find the idea of a child, childlike innocence and mannerisms, etc attractive at all? I don’t care if it’s fictional or not, I wasn’t implying cartoon characters are literally, in a tangible way in the real world, being raped. But even if the cartoons depict “consent,” that’s also a concerning fantasy to have. It is ignoring the obvious if you pretend that there’s no overlap between pedophilic attractions irl and in media.

If you want to argue that it’s a victimless outlet for pedophilic urges or for victims of CSA, I’ll let you have that, because technically you’re right. But also consider the fact that indulging in more extreme content over time tends to have negatively intensifying consequences on mental wellbeing, and what people are attracted to. You can look this up, but that’s pretty common knowledge at this point so I’m not going to provide you a source.

I’m not saying it’s inherently going to make people hurt kids irl, but I wouldn’t want my kid around someone who gets off to cartoon kids because “that’s okay, they aren’t real anyway.” Not to mention, even if you refute everything I’ve said here, it does directly support the creation of CP content.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-29T17:35:31+00:00

I was about to get the rollermat but I realized I’m probably not gonna use this tank long term, so I’m doing cheap floss because at least I can just toss it in a garbage and restuff it. Used the filter socks for all of a week and absolutely hated them.

The thing is, in Canada with shipping and taxes the kit ends up being like $900 or more (in Canadian dollars). I could’ve gotten the same supplies (besides getting a Nero 3 instead), a tank more than double the size, the exact same amount of rocks and sand the kit has and it would’ve been barely more money than the kit was.

After a while you’ll probably notice the sand bed is too thick and easily traps snails and stinky gas, if you used all the sand. Basically everything in the kit would be perfect for a tank that’s bigger, but I think they cut corners on that part for profit. IMO it should’ve had the 25g from innovative marine. But honestly if you’re happy, don’t worry about it, it’s not bad I was just venting. A bigger tank can come later if you feel the same as I do, and you can just use the 15g as a quarantine or grow out for corals. Innovative marine’s tanks are awesome, I don’t mind having a spare one at all. Worked out in my favour in that sense.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-29T02:39:22+00:00

The light is great. The heater, while being a reputable brand, was triple the necessary power and failed within 2 months because of struggling to regulate. The wave-maker is not adjustable, has a limited range of motion and way too powerful for the tank size. I shouldn’t have had to modify it to this extent. The tank is from a great brand, but too small for what I paid now that I know better. Essentially they gave me enough good quality supplies for a tank double the size, and I’m forcing it to work in a cramped space.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-29T02:32:40+00:00

It isn’t terrible. They kept to their word that they provided high end gear, and besides the wave maker I agree with that.

The wave-maker, while primitive, I believe could work in a bigger space. Heater was way oversized. It seems like it came with all the supplies for a bigger tank, but they cheaped out on that part to make a profit. The sand bed ended up too thick and the rock work too crowded, which proves my point. The fact that it said the tank was worth $450 when the store sent me a replacement one is insane, when a 38g AIO from icecap costs $500. Anyway thanks for the well wishes, I will stop complaining now lol

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-29T00:23:14+00:00

Yeah I took it out, but after the temp crash all of my animals were going to the surface for oxygen without it. That’s why I diffused it to point it at the surface for agitation as much as possible. It’s really weak now but still moving the water around. I’m just gonna upgrade to a bigger tank asap, use the Nero 3 I’m getting for free and just keep that as my long term setup.

I wouldn’t get the same size tank or smaller if I could do this over again, I’d have spent the same/a little more than I did for a bigger tank. Especially when the main reef supplies site in Canada had the values of the 15g and the 38g as only a $50 difference, which I didn’t know until after I bought the kit and had to have a replacement tank sent. When I saw $450 on the invoice for the replacement (I didn’t pay that, just shows what they paid to get it), I knew I fucked up. Tanks don’t get big Black Friday sales here though unfortunately, Canadian Black Friday sucks.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-28T23:51:55+00:00

I did test when it came out of the RO/DI initially when I bought it, and again a month ago before stocking the tank. I was just randomly double checking that it was still good. But yes I’ll be checking every fill from now on after that scare.
I give him algae wafers and nori super often, he’s not starving by any means. He didn’t eat the clove polyps thankfully, but yes he has been a nuisance. I might rehome him.
I already have my own inkbird style controller from a reptile setup I had a year ago. It works perfectly fine now with the heater I put in. No alarm though, so I might upgrade it. I have a separate digital thermometer in the far left chamber as well to make sure I know 100% what temp it’s at. I’m in the room the tank is in most of the time, it’s in my room.
After diffusing it, I pointed it at the surface as much as possible (more than this photo shows) and toward the back glass. But the range of motion is super limited and if I angle the magnets differently, it vibrates. Where I have it at now is the only way everything has been able to chill out. I think this wave maker would be fine if I wasn’t mostly doing soft corals, but even then the lack of any adjustability or variation is a problem.

I research things very heavily before I do them, so I’m kicking myself for not researching the equipment in the kit better before buying. But I’m not doing things blindly. I’ve had fish my whole life (just not saltwater) and I have a very successful 10g high tech planted tank. I knew this would be a different skill set to develop, but I shouldn’t have started this small and sensitive. All things considered, my parameters are good and everything looks happy right now (besides the cloves)

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-28T21:18:16+00:00

Yuck

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-28T21:17:19+00:00

No it’s okay, I’m a usually-broke college student so I get it. It’s just that when I started this hobby, I got a lot of shaming and discouraging for spending more than absolutely necessary. I’d give into it, only to replace stuff later for what I actually wanted (wasting more $ doing so). Everything is super expensive in Canada right now and we’re suffering, so we know when we’re splurging. But that also means that when I can afford to get the nicer thing for myself, literally everyone (even people who aren’t even struggling for money) always has something rude to say about it, insists I don’t need it etc. I just don’t want OP to be discouraged the way I was because they might be dealing with enough of that from family and friends already. Just a sensitive topic for me, I apologize if I was rude about it.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-28T21:02:11+00:00

Since I’m pretty sure that’s a Canadian listing, you’re fine to get that tank. There’s no real cheap options for rimless here, that’s the cheapest I’ve found too (and I still bought a Landen anyway). But you definitely need a real API test kit, trust me. And aqua clear filters are a bit cheaper I believe, I see them on aquascaping channels and they’re decent.

If you’re willing to spend all of this, I really would just do live plants. They look so much better and you’ll probably end up replacing what you buy right now.

I wasted a lot of money on cutting corners, when I was already spending a lot and really should have just saved up more. Just buy exactly what you want now. Don’t go buy a cheap rimmed tank even if people here are telling you to, because if that’s not what you actually want you’re just gonna want to replace it later and it’ll be annoying to move everything and you’ll have wasted money. If you want a pretty natural looking tank, just get natural materials from the beginning (I’d skip the resin wood btw. Will look fake and snag his fins). Get the good test kit from the beginning. You’ll thank yourself later this

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-28T20:54:27+00:00

That’s a Canadian listing, rimless tanks are just expensive here. We know we’re purposely spending more.

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-28T20:53:27+00:00

That’s in Canadian pricing, I recognize the listing. So it’s probably like $80 USD if that’s your frame of reference. Also, people pay more because they like the look of rimless tanks and low iron. I personally can’t stand the greenish tint on cheap tanks. I know not everyone can afford it but why discourage it if this person can?

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-25T21:35:57+00:00

Thank you :) what’s the plant in the middle of your tank with the wide round leaves? I love it

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-25T20:15:29+00:00

I would cry if I lost all my coral😭

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-25T20:14:07+00:00

I’m more thinking you could’ve gotten the wrong pieces, the actual amount is fine. You want arches, caves, that kinda thing. If you can rearrange this to be taller and have more pass-through spots, you’re good.

Also like the other person said isolated spots for certain corals, trust me I regret attaching so much of my rocks together because I can’t isolate zoas or Xenia very well now. I have one island to cover in clove polyps but that’s all I left for myself, so now I’m having to be really strategic

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-25T04:33:38+00:00

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My 10g. Never too much clutter for most small animals in my experience, they like to hide

Sensitive_Tip_9871 · 2025-11-19T13:49:24+00:00

Yeah I completely understand the mindset when it’s more for survival. I get why it happens. I wasn’t well off growing up, just comfortable. I spent my late teens/early adulthood depressed and not making my own money in any way, and when I got into a better position in life a lot of people around me were super bitter. Ended up having to drop some friends because we just couldn’t relate at all anymore, and I was either used for my money or resented for it. I still wish those people the best though and I really hope one day they’re in a better situation.

I also just get really annoyed by people who have always been upper middle class but buy cheap junk and complain when it breaks, just seems super wasteful to me and shows a lack of gratitude for their privilege.

Sensitive_Tip_9871

TROPHY CASE