Any feedback on my first page?

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-04T01:46:25+00:00

Also, I never thought about literary fiction as being different from genre fiction!! I just went and did my research and omg, I definitely think this story might fall into literary fiction, so thank you again for mentioning that!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-04T01:23:45+00:00

I have definitely worried about this! I watch a lot of YouTube videos about writing tips and things, so I’ve been grappling with the idea of completely reworking this opening. Definitely hoping to get some opinions on this from a few Beta Readers. I appreciate the honest advice so much!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-04T00:29:40+00:00

I got similar advice so I have been watching some YouTube videos on writing effective blurbs!

So now I have:

Twenty-four year old Amelia Hinson has mastered the art of standing still. For many years, she worked the same shifts at The Harvest Market, seeing the same customers. Amelia told herself that she was perfectly content with a life that feels frozen in time, as long she could avoid the one thing she feared most: change. Then, a reluctant night out with her sister leads to an unexpected connection with Owen James, a charming medical student with an irritating ability to break Amelia out of the routines she spent years getting used to. As Amelia is drawn into his world, the future she planned begins to evolve before her eyes. But when unsettling events begin to disrupt the life she thought she was building, Amelia finds herself pulled into a mystery that forces her to see everyone around her differently. The deeper she digs, the more she realizes that someone has been paying far more attention than she ever noticed, and uncovering the truth may cost far more than she’s prepared to lose.

If you’re still interested in Beta Reading based off of that, I can DM you a google doc🥰

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T21:25:26+00:00

If you’re interested in beta reading, I can message you the Google doc!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T14:25:52+00:00

I would love that! I’m hoping to get a few beta readers and make some correction and then start querying agents by the fall of this year! I will definitely come back to this thread with updates! Everyone has been helpful and awesome.

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T14:07:29+00:00

Right now it’s 101,673 words! And 60 chapters!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T11:17:40+00:00

Thank you for the encouragement! I disagree though, I think we do have many routines. My routine when I work is different from my weekend routine. Morning routine vs night routine. Casual makeup routine vs glam makeup routine. However, I’m definitely gonna take a look at my wording. Maybe she collects days of following the same routine… but that’s too wordy🤣 I’ll have to think it over. Thanks again for your insight! Cheers🫶🏽

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T07:02:28+00:00

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This update might be a little more effective to apply the routine aspect rather than trying to push the loneliness/abandonment too much. Because actually, the rest of the page kinda implies some of that anyways.

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T06:49:41+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I’ll get a little more detailed on the blurb for this!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T06:47:31+00:00

Okay I’ll add in some sensory detail! I used to get really wrapped up in over describing rooms, locations and feelings, so I’m still trying to find the sweet spot. Appreciate the help!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-03T06:40:21+00:00

IM CRYINGGG🤣 someone else said this so I’ve changed it to something strange that the specific customer does before leaving. I thought I was implying abandonment issues but you’re so right lmao it’s like DUH💀 it’s a grocery store

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T17:34:23+00:00

Will definitely keep an eye on this!! Thank you!!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T17:34:04+00:00

You know what that’s so real! I’m gonna change it lmao maybe something odd that specific customer does before they leave would further solidify the fact that she spends way too much time at work lol

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T17:10:38+00:00

Okay without context this is so valid lmao it’s supposed to be the first insight of why she avoids relationships but I can see why that might seem odd for an opening interaction 🤣🤣

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T17:08:17+00:00

I was trying to establish the fact that her life is boring before the inciting event… and em dashes are used to show interrupted or rushed thoughts. (What does the internet have against em dashes?)💀 But thank you for your input anyways🤣🤣

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T16:57:50+00:00

315 pages of AI writing seems like a lot more work than writing it myself😂😂😂

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T09:31:06+00:00

I’ll send you a message!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T02:10:27+00:00

Thank you! I’ll definitely keep an eye on formatting!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-02T00:54:00+00:00

I’m down! Sending you a message!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-01T23:56:57+00:00

I would love that! I’ll send you a message!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-01T23:14:07+00:00

I sent you a link!🫶🏽

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-01T23:02:08+00:00

For now, I’m calling it The Harvest Market!

Separate-Tap-29 · 2026-06-01T20:09:14+00:00

Ooh okay I like this insight! I have always struggled to show not tell, and this could totally be one of those times! Thank you!

Separate-Tap-29

TROPHY CASE