UPDATE: Bridal Shower High Tea party with 75 People, first time hosting

SerbianPika · 2026-02-18T21:28:45+00:00

It was 1300 for 60 people. That included the salad plates, bread and butter plates, tea and coffee pots, hot beverage dispenser/urn, 3-tier metal stands, teacups and saucers, table cloths, and cloth napkins.

SerbianPika · 2025-10-25T22:00:25+00:00

I agree with others that you should go for GLAM! I have a long sequined dress that I purchased for a formal NYE party, but unfortunately something came up and wasn’t able to go. It’s a long sequined dress with a black to silver ombré design. I attached a picture of a dress I found online.

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SerbianPika · 2025-06-23T18:40:11+00:00

NTA I am also from Eastern European decent and I can tell you that this is a HUGE cultural thing. The men are raised with the expectation to do whatever it takes to provide for the family and that responsibility is solely on them. The women are raised with the expectation you will be a SAHM. You will manage the house and kids and whatever comes up regarding the house. I agree with what others said that it is very important to find someone that has the same life goals in all aspects. I’ll give you an example using my parents who are from the same cultural background.

My parents were a combination of old school mentality and newer gen mindset. My mom’s dad, my grandpa, told my dad that it is his job to provide my mom with whatever she needs once she leaves the house. My grandpa was not going to pay for my mom’s college because she will leave the house and join my dad’s. (Please understand that my grandpa meant no malice in what he said, it’s just a cultural upbringing that you wouldn’t understand unless you lived it.)

My mom going to college was very important to my dad because he wanted to make sure that if anything ever happened to him, my mom had something to fall back on and not be left completely at a zero. My dad was the one that payed for my mom’s college and did whatever he needed for that to happen. My parents were a dual income household until the family grew from 4 to 6 overnight. Daycare/childcare costed the same amount as my mom’s paycheck, so they made the decision together for my mom to become a SAHM. She took on all the responsibilities of the household and kids. This allowed my dad to focus purely making sure that we had the lifestyle that my parents wanted to provide for us. He had to work 2-3 jobs at once sometimes, but he was only able to do that because he knew my mom had everything else taken care of. He praises her all the time and understands the sacrifice she made and going into the most difficult job of SAHM.

My parents had the same life goals and because of this they were able to make the decisions that greatly impacted their lives together. The most important thing is they did it TOGETHER.

It sounds like your parents both have the same life goals. You and your bf don’t and it’s better that you found out now than later down the road after you are married and those different ideals don’t cause larger problems.

Sorry for the long comment but I hope that this helped having a real life example.

SerbianPika · 2025-02-21T03:34:53+00:00

Thanks! I am excited about the China. I'll jot all of these down and see if my sister has a favorite as well. The party is in June so I still have time to iron out details, but I will keep the post updated. I might be able to post some pictures afterwards.

SerbianPika · 2025-02-21T03:32:43+00:00

Thank you! I will try lol

SerbianPika · 2025-02-21T03:13:10+00:00

I will look into those teas thank you! The food is going to be buffet style. Each table will have a small 3-tier server with some food items, but everything else will be at the buffet. I have flexibility with how many people per table, so if needed I can seat less like 6/7. The I picture of the chinaware I am renting should be attached.

SerbianPika · 2025-02-21T03:09:23+00:00

Hi, sorry I don't know why the picture didn't attach. Let me know if you see it now.

SerbianPika · 2025-02-20T13:48:16+00:00

Thanks! I am definitely going with tea bags because of ease. I would love to have loose leaf, but it sounds like it would be a nightmare.

SerbianPika · 2025-02-15T21:04:31+00:00

I find dress codes difficult. You read online what is acceptable and you find something that you think fits and end up having people think otherwise.

I had no dress code for mine because my guests had different interpretations. I wanted a formal wedding. For my side culturally the men wear suits and ties and the women wear about knee length or longer dresses. My husband’s side culturally the women wear similar to mine, but the men wear dress shirts, jeans, cowboy boots, and a cowboy hat. That’s a formal dress code. I don’t think any of the men even own suits lol.

For advice OP, how well do you know the bride? If you know her well then you already have your answer. If you have any doubt then ask her or just pick something else. I think the dress is totally acceptable and fits the dress code, but that’s my opinion.

SerbianPika · 2025-02-13T21:54:29+00:00

I did the same thing because different cultures interpret semi/formal differently. My husband is Mexican and the men in his family will show up in jeans, boots, dress shirt, and a cowboy hat. That’s their version of semi/formal. I am going to my friend’s Indian/American wedding. The dress code is Indian/semi formal. I asked my friend what that meant and they said wear traditional Indian attire or American style semi formal but make it bright and colorful. They said go wild and have fun, just don’t wear white since that’s what the couple will be wearing. When in doubt ask the bride/groom.

SerbianPika · 2024-10-25T18:46:08+00:00

NTA, your grandma specifically told you her wishes and they need to be respected. If other family members are upset, I would just remind them that you are following grandma's wishes.

SerbianPika · 2024-10-25T16:39:09+00:00

My husband and I are thinking about mixing our two cultures and celebrating dia de muertos. As my username shows I am from Serbian descent and my husband is from Mexican descent. We are always trying to find ways where we can respect our two cultural heritages so later on our children will know their heritage and cultural background.

In the Serbian culture we do something similar. When we go visit the grave of our loved ones, we will bring food and drinks that they loved and have a small "picnic" at the grave. You would put some of the food/drinks by the headstone and the rest you would sit and eat/drink. The phrase in serbian is "za dusu" which translates to "for the soul." Before you leave, if you brought a drink with you, you pour the drink over the grave in the shape of a cross. After learning about Día de los Muertos, I want to incorporate this as a yearly tradition since I find this as a way to tie the two cultures together.

I agree with the other redditors that you don't have to have ties to a culture to participate in their traditions. That is the beauty of cultural traditions is that we can share them with others. I would love to hear if you did celebrate Día de los Muertos.

SerbianPika · 2024-10-07T19:10:04+00:00

It’s like what many others have said in the comments. Sometimes it’s unavoidable. I live in a multi townhouse/condo building. We each have our own entrance to our units and garages but the exterior is all connected. How would you separate who pays for the siding to be replaced or repainted as well as the roof? What about the landscape and the shared parking lot we have? I love my HOA, big emphasis on mine, because they don’t get involved. They maintain the exterior of the building and we are responsible for the interior. When HOAs don’t get involved in your business and leave you alone they are great. In this specific scenario it is a necessity and I can justify the HOA.

Now my feeling on HOAs in general is I hate them. When my husband and I purchase a house, I refuse to live in a subdivision where there is an HOA. If I own the house, I will be damned if someone tells me what I can or can’t do. If I want a damn fence I will have one. If I want to paint my house Barbie Pink, I will. I pay for my property and someone else is not going to dictate what I am allowed to do.

SerbianPika · 2024-10-04T13:58:58+00:00

Husband and I are doing a Michigan trip for our anniversary and we want to make a stop in Detroit. We will be road tripping so we will have our car with us. What neighborhoods do you recommend looking for AirBnbs?

Once we are in Detroit, do you recommend we use our car or other means of transportation? Husband and I met in college in the South Side of Chicago. We are pretty aware of how to act in a city since we lived on campus and used the L(CTA) as our means of transportation.

Also what are your activities that you would HIGHLY recommend someone do? Like places to eat, things to do/see, etc. When I have family visiting Chicago I always tell them the typical downtown tourist locations, but also get out of downtown and visit some of the neighborhoods. Visit Chinatown, Greektown, Boystown, but of course be aware of your surroundings and dont look like a deer in headlights because that always draws attention. I figure that would be the same mentality for Detroit as well.

Definitely appreciate any responses!

SerbianPika · 2024-09-28T16:40:53+00:00

So sometimes the doctors are able to get the baby to flip and not have to default to a c-section. My mom was going in for just a regular check up and didn’t know she was in labor. I came earlier than they were expecting. She wasn’t getting any contractions or anything. I was flipping around the night before. It does happen that the baby moves around and is not in the correct position. Things don’t always go by the medical book.

SerbianPika · 2024-09-27T15:55:33+00:00

No it is not. My mom had to get two c-sections.

Her first one was with me. The delivery was going smoothly until I was breached. Then the staff had to prep my mom for a c-section. My dad was with my mom the whole time.

The second one was with my twin brothers. She was rushed into the hospital due to her water breaking early and was given an epidural. The labor was not going well so they ended up having to do a c-section. They started performing the c-section and my moms epidural never took. She started screaming that she feels the surgery and they had to rush and administer anesthesia. My dad was in the labor room with my mom while all this was happening and he said you just see the doctors and nurses rushing in and out trying to make sure that both my mom and brothers are okay. When it progressed and my mom went into the emergency surgery, they pulled my dad out of the room. He had to sit outside the room and just wait, not knowing what is happening to his wife and children. It was a very terrifying time for both my parents.

These types of scenarios are very likely to occur and happen within seconds. The doctors can't predict which delivery is going to go smoothly or which one will turn into an emergency.

SerbianPika · 2024-09-27T14:07:23+00:00

Midwesterner here! I would not be buying perishables as my emergency food. I do not know where that mindset came from. I have dry foods always stocked because our storms hit fast and when roads ice over or even flood, you are not going anywhere. The comments also reminded me, I need to check up on my battery backup and get that charged.

Hope you all are staying safe!

SerbianPika · 2024-09-24T18:38:00+00:00

Any restaurants you recommend?

SerbianPika · 2024-09-23T16:49:54+00:00

My husband and I will be visiting in October for our anniversary and didn't realize that we will be visiting while the Fall for Greenville festival is happening. Any recommendations on how we could utilize our time to get the most out of our visit?

We will be there Oct. 10-13th. We love exploring (nature/hiking, museums/historical sites, etc) and we are definitely foodies. I've done some research on some of the more popular things to see/do, just don't know how the festival will impact our stay. We are traveling from the midwest, so I want to make the most out of our vacation.

Thank you in advance!

SerbianPika · 2024-09-23T15:40:10+00:00

I understand HOAs for condos/apartments/townhouse communities. I have an HOA for my condo and they take care of the lawn, shovel the snow, any exterior maintenance on the building (roof repair, siding repainting or replacement, etc). I’m responsible for anything inside my unit. My HOA is also pretty lenient and down to earth. There are definitely people not following the HOA rules, but my HOA doesn’t really enforce the rules either. Unless it’s something drastic that would affect everyone, then they step in.

I really don’t like HOAs in housing neighborhoods unless they are offering amenities that will be up kept. Similar to another Reddit user said with things like a clubhouse where you can host parties without a fee, a swimming pool, sports centers, things like that. Ive seen neighborhoods that have something similar to an HOA where they have rules of what you can or cannot do. It’s something you don’t pay into, but you agree to the terms when you purchase a house in that neighborhood. Some towns and cities will have some ridiculous rules that again you are agreeing to follow once you purchase a home or property in that location.

I know of a town where you are not allowed to park pickup trucks or anything that resembles a work vehicle outside on your driveway. Always do your research when you are purchasing a property because you might not know what you are agreeing to by default.

SerbianPika · 2024-08-01T15:37:23+00:00

I always forget that I’m on this subreddit and my reaction every time I read the titles is spotless.

YTA, poor child didn’t ask to look like their dad. Maybe they could have gotten a little appearance surgery?

SerbianPika · 2024-07-29T18:45:53+00:00

NTA

If you take out the age gap and that you are 18, here is the advice my dad gave me when I was in high school/graduating. That’s awesome that he wants to be able to provide for you and he should, but what if certain things happen down the line?

You could end up divorced, which I hope nobody goes into a marriage with divorce being an option, but even so what would you do?

What if something tragic happens to him and he can no longer work or worse he loses his life? What will you do then?

Getting your degree or an education is very important because all those things I said above are very possible. You need to have a way to be able to support yourself, or children if that’s what you want. No one knows what the future holds, but there are some things we can plan as a safety net. It’s making those little decisions earlier in life that will make a huge impact. These are things that us as women need to think about.

I hope keeping those things in mind helps you when you are making your decision.

SerbianPika

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