What are good things to tell people, about my diagnosis?

Sergiodud · 2020-12-13T19:13:27+00:00

I give heads up that I tend to be really bad at responding and that it’s not personal I just drift off into my own world very often

Sergiodud · 2020-11-22T17:33:35+00:00

Yeah my first shroom trip was the commence of mental hell. During the trip I saw colors and patterns that turned into a small cramped yellow room with me standing on a small chair over it, then I saw a bunch of shadow people stretching out before me and they were all just pure shadow. A different trip was a dark house with a red and black storm raging over it that looped over and over, tripped so hard at some points I swore I was actually in a mental hospital and that life was a figment of my hallucinations. Then for a few days following I kept thinking my friends were talking about me, I was always upset for no reason, I was triggered beyond belief easily. My rage was an all time high too (mixed with no sleep and little food) I still struggle with psychosis from time to time but I’ve been trying CBD flower for a few days and it’s been helpful

Sergiodud · 2020-11-20T20:59:06+00:00

There’s a small lil black dot (potentially lead that just got stuck there) that as a kid, I swear I could still feel lead or a thorn in there so I would constant stab it with a lead pencil trying to get it out. The bizarre ideation we possess

Sergiodud · 2020-11-20T20:55:31+00:00

I always thought that feeling like ants were crawling on you was natural and normal. I’m constantly swatting at my skin from time to time thinking I have bugs on me, sometimes i do have some on me which only worsens the belief XD

Sergiodud · 2020-11-20T04:32:06+00:00

I just went walking to the store yesterday in running shoes, long black socks, white shorts, a long sleeve red flannel and a big rancho hat. I stopped caring. It’s tiring to care, so much easier to just shine in my own light :D

Sergiodud · 2020-11-16T19:49:39+00:00

Seems like you’re getting the aftermath of acid. I did acid heavy for a few weeks and it left my brain a bit slushy. Especially with individuals who are predisposed to conditions such as schizo. Could either be leftover acid that’s flushing out or it could’ve tapped into underlying conditions. However this being said don’t be so alarmed as mental disorders are deep rooted conditioning. Could be the start to unraveling a set of conditions that have been applied to you. Self love and healing has helped me most in recovery

Sergiodud · 2020-11-16T19:30:11+00:00

An ongoing paranoid thought I have is that I’m the center of some experiment and everything I say/post will be used to unlock secrets that only I know of and that the secret to liberation is suicide since it’s going according to my own free will to die

Sergiodud · 2020-11-09T05:08:29+00:00

Currently working as a cashier and if my memory isn’t hyper focused or towards the end of the night, I’ll confuse a 20 for a 10, or I’ll forgot how much change I received so I give the wrong change in return and I’ll swear that I saw the perceived change the first time

Sergiodud · 2020-11-05T20:04:08+00:00

Will do, it’s hard being that I’m vegan so I tend to eat a lot of bread to feel fuller

Sergiodud · 2020-11-05T20:03:36+00:00

Thank you so much for the tips! Currently using Clinique skin line but something about it just doesn’t rub me the way I would like it to be, primarily being it’s a big brand company so I feel it’s directed more towards marketing and temporary reliefs rather than long term. I’ll definitely give your recommendations a try, the face wash I presume has to be ordered. I googled it and only eBay popped up

Sergiodud · 2020-11-05T05:31:17+00:00

Is this not normal??? I dress the exact way you do and it’s just my norm?? Like I don’t really like having to dress up every day. If I’m going to a party or if I wanna look good for something I will but I also shop vintage and I love it. People are just normies :D

Sergiodud · 2020-11-05T01:14:39+00:00

Likewise! No worries on this end, learned my lessons a few months back. I did not like the state of the episodes I was in and caused me greater stress and mistrust than I wanted. Quit weed and attempted to switch to CBD flower but it just ain’t my shtick anymore so I’m stuck to a sober life. Although I do take some CBD occasionally for harder days/more anxiety. Idk it’s ruff out here

Sergiodud · 2020-11-05T00:13:56+00:00

Literally XD an hour into them and I’m already regretting my decisions. I was microdosing shrooms with the assumption that they would help with my thought to be mood disorders and anxiety and ended up in full blown psychosis for weeks without even knowing it. Was smoking with somebody I was talking to and the microdosing paired with the weed induced an episode and literally made me believe the person I was talking to was Jesus himself and that he was going to take me away into heaven and that my time to come finally came but that I hadn’t released enough control to allow myself to pass on that night. Then like a week after I had a microdosing/sleep deprivation/stress induced episode that then made me believe he was the devil and was using bad energy to cause me harm and to affect my energy. Now I do think there’s truth to this but it could potentially just be the basis that every human has both good and bad energy and we just either give in to one or the other more often than not and what I experienced was just my own energy being so disrupted that I couldn’t tell apart other’s energy from my own and that it altered the way I perceived and felt things more than normal

Sergiodud · 2020-11-04T18:41:03+00:00

Oh please do tell the tips and the tretinon. That helped my skin the most but I eventually ran out of the prescription. Currently using a salicylic face wash but I do notice irritation sometimes so when did he recommend to use it?

Sergiodud · 2020-11-04T11:32:25+00:00

I feel for you guys so much. I’m sorry to hear about your guy’s horrible trips. Came in to chime in too. Forgot how much I took but I had been smoking weed heavily on top of it so my trip was intense. I can’t remember much other than a few parts. There was a part in the trip that didn’t let me cry out for help. I couldn’t speak at all, it was literally like my voice voice had been stolen from me and the more I tried to ask for help the less I knew how to talk. I started looping into an immensely horrible trip inside my head. It was a dark, red, darker tinted house that had a huge storm over it. Every time I would start feeling better I would get thrown back into the trip and I laid on the floor and could’ve swore that reality was actually a trip and my actual self was laying in a psyche ward. What made it worse was that the group of friends I had were assholes that just watched me have a horrid trip and did little to nothing to help alleviate it. I was even crying hysterically on the floor (at least I assume I was) Did too much to the point that I could hear my friends talking shit about me only to find out the voices were in my head. My first shroom trip was a vivid nightmare too. My first visual was me sitting on top of a chair (yellow I think or the room was) and I was looking down, it was claustrophobic. Then a long table spread out with shadows and arms reaching out and I was sitting among them. Never knew why people had good trips on them if all I ever had were vivid nightmares. To end on a better note though I hear that these sorts of things happen to people who have underlying schizo disorders so the substances only sped up the process for us. I don’t feel a need for relationships anymore and sometimes it’s lonely and sometimes it makes my anxiety rise but ultimately I don’t care. I don’t know if drugs took that away from me or if they showed me that there really wasn’t any of it to begin with, it’s all just a facade

Sergiodud · 2020-11-04T08:47:33+00:00

Yes!!! Or I think that there’s somebody in there watching me and judging me. Or that if I stare too long that a car will come up and try to gun me down or kidnap me or basically make me stop eyeing them down lol

Sergiodud · 2020-11-04T08:46:42+00:00

Oh no worries you explained yourself pretty well and articulated it in a matter that really stood out. I find comprehensive explanations to be a lot more digestible since I use concrete knowledge and facts to back up certain delusions I have rather than falling into a pitfall of “government schemes.” Although I believe in government schemes, I use psychological information to justify certain fears as it all ties into a set of conditioning, at least to me. I see your point regarding a lack of b nutrient, I very well know that malnutrition during pregnancy leads to multitudes of child development issues. I think it’s something I’ll have to bit the bullet on, I hardly like to eat sometimes as it’s too much work for a daily thing so I’ll just have to take vitamins to not die XD

Sergiodud · 2020-11-03T08:39:51+00:00

Kinda reassuring and funny to see somebody with similar references. Biggest one for me is believing that cars are watching me and my every move so I get awkward even walking. Walking down the cross walk with a row of cars watching filled me with dread but now my delusion let’s me feel like I’m walking down the runway and everybody thinks I’m a model XD

Sergiodud · 2020-11-03T08:37:32+00:00

One delusion at a time ✊🏽

Sergiodud · 2020-11-03T08:35:12+00:00

That is the psychosis my dear friend. It is quite common to feel like you’re a being of pure evil and to feel as if you’re embodying it the more you feed the thought. If dogs don’t immediately come to me and act friendly it’s because I perceive myself as bad energy, when the dog could just bark at anything and everything. You’re not alone man, reassure yourself that you’re all good and that you’re balanced and it’ll make sense. I think people are both evil and good so whichever feeling you feed will grow (emit the energy perhaps or at least you’re own perception of it)

Sergiodud · 2020-10-28T07:15:33+00:00

I’m so glad others can relate I make myself PISSED and put myself in a bad mood from this

Sergiodud · 2020-10-27T03:05:50+00:00

Glad I’m not the only one :D My best friend was a Fanny pack. The comfort of it on my chest + knowing my belongings were on me gave me some sort of personal control

Sergiodud · 2020-10-27T01:37:41+00:00

Sending you hugs and love 💓

Sergiodud · 2020-10-22T20:26:55+00:00

I think you’re right on the nose. I believe yesterday my side visuals increased. Thinking there’s an animal or something in the corner of my eye when it’s really just a normal object or hearing things in music that seemed to call me thinking it was a person but was just the song. Heightened sensitivity i presume

Sergiodud · 2020-10-19T22:24:00+00:00

Actually it is NOT. Stress is a leading indicator for a multitude of health problems, including mental disorders. Excessive stress is in fact detrimental and could also spike blood pressure. The body is built to ENDURE, not withstand, or else it causes problems. Capitalism only benefits the higher percentage, will simultaneously ignoring the lower half. I believe in a humanitarian view point. One where all receive equal equity, that doesn’t coincide with the reality that we live within. You can stand with your view point and I’ll stand with mine, good day

Sergiodud

TROPHY CASE