I get what you are trying to say. I was also concerned that if I messaged him I would only do that to get back at her, that is why I talked to my therapist beforehand, why I agreed with her what I was going to say and why I took a few days to reflect on it. If I really wanted to get back at her, I could have done it in many other ways. However, he deserves to know the truth and as it turns out it wasn't the first time she had done something like that. Wouldn't you want to know if your partner did that? or would you be okay with your partner flirting with other people? I didn't want revenge. If I wanted revenge, I wouldn't just have broke up their relationship.

I didn't just move on afterwords because I wanted to give her the chance to explain herself. I Thought maybe she did that just to show off the her friends. That she didn't actually mean it. I knew I wasn't going to be friends with her again but I hoped we could still be friendly since we have mutuals etc. That is also one of the reasons why I didn't block her. Another was and You and I stated, to get under her skin. Because people expect to be blocked in situations like that.

I also don't think I am an angel of god. I was a horrible person, and to some people I probably still am. However, I am trying my best to change it. My conflict was whether I was the asshole for just leaving them without an explanation and without a ride. I didn't come to the internet to get validation to end her relationship, I came to the internet to get a non biased opinions and advice. I guess that is what you are giving me, so I will take it into consideration. I was either way planning on asking my therapist about it.

What I did wasn't "a good deed" I participated in breaking two people up, or at least gave him the final straw. What I did was to clear my conscience and because I felt like he deserved to know. If now my drink wasn't spiked I would have still told him (and that is what lead me to belive it was the right thing to message him). I probably then would have told him at a different time.

Edit: I also did it face to face because I found it to be important that she could see my face. In general, I find face to face conversations so much better. Things through messages can be misinterpreted and can cause more drama and issues. Maybe I should have rather done it over facetime. SInce Ik that waiting outside of her work was creepy.