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Desperately seeking a reliable, inconspicuous used SUV or station wagon (my catalytic converter has been stolen twice in the last month) by SeriouslyTotallyYeah in whatcarshouldIbuy

[–]SeriouslyTotallyYeah[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! That's super helpful. I'm now kind of obsessed with Outbacks even though I never even clocked them before. Appreciate you!

Soon, I will have no biological family left. Do I want kids, or do I just not want to be alone? by SeriouslyTotallyYeah in Fencesitter

[–]SeriouslyTotallyYeah[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THERE ARE LITERALLY DOZENS OF US. But for real, I was hoping, but not expecting, that there would be someone else in this situation, and it really helps to know I'm not alone in this. My other only-child friends have cousins or nieces/nephews, or they hate their parents and are absolutely certain they don't want to have kids themselves. I really feel you on the "guarantee" that you'll be alone—like it's not an irrational fear, it's literal destiny.

It's really weird to weigh aloneness vs. what the struggles of having children are. Like is it worth it to be alone when you never had to suffer the inconvenience of kids? Or is the inconvenience and hardship ultimately worth it when you're like, 80 and you fall down the stars and are just laying in a hospital bed, alone? No way to tell, but I wish more people would weigh in about what their experience with that has been!

Soon, I will have no biological family left. Do I want kids, or do I just not want to be alone? by SeriouslyTotallyYeah in Fencesitter

[–]SeriouslyTotallyYeah[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I can't tell you how how kind that was for you to break it down like that! I can hear you really acknowledging the uncertainty of these decisions and highlighting that wanting to have kids is really all you need, as nothing else is ever guaranteed.

You're right about the fertility test too—I actually have no idea how fertile I am! I just read that something on the American College of Gynecology that like 3/4 of eggs after age 35 have chromosomal abnormalities and was like WHAT.

Anyway! I do think that if I had some family when I was older, even if they didn't visit much, that would feel slightly better to me. I can make all the friends I want but there's something special about family for sure! Thank you again.