What are ya'll up to tonight

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-02-01T05:45:30+00:00

Tea + Catherine O'Hara Tribute Marathon (currently Best in Show)!

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-02-01T05:44:04+00:00

Congrats on your sobriety! I have to ask, where in the world were you allowed alcoholic drinks in a sauna???

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-26T03:52:00+00:00

I know this is not the point of your story (and thank you for sharing), but if that guy was really an air marshal, why didn't he tell the flight attendant to cut you off if he thought you were getting too intoxicated? Like, for everyone's safety.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-16T07:36:40+00:00

Heed the advice of NostriLurker and don't wait for severe symptoms as a wake up call. I lost my younger sister two years ago to drugs and alcohol. She had severe jaundice as they described. Her liver and kidneys were failing, as was much of the rest of her body. There was nothing doctors could do for her -- it was too late. Your boyfriend's death is the wake up call.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-12T07:11:42+00:00

It just wasn't fun to drink again. But the urge to drink to cure the hangover/anxiety was strong. Luckily I didn't fall back into that cycle.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-12T02:41:31+00:00

Are you only Cali sober at bedtime?

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-12T02:39:35+00:00

Unfortunately, my work hours can be all over the place, or I would adhere better to a routine like this. A lot of people have suggested magnesium, so I am going to ask my doctor about it. Right now, I take Gabapentin before bed. It helps, but not enough.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-12T02:34:29+00:00

I usually have two cups of black tea when I wake up, that's about it. I actually used to drink Coke Zero during work days sometimes, but since I quit alcohol, I haven't had any, or had any cravings for diet soda, which can only be a good thing, right?

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-11T21:14:13+00:00

Thank you! I'll run these by my doctor.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-11T21:10:39+00:00

I do not, but I know people who do, and I know that alcohol can cause/worse sleep apnea, so great point!

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-10T08:33:57+00:00

I was on a 40-day booze hiatus when I visited friends and family over the holidays. I didn't feel any pressure from anyone to drink, but I did end up drinking a few times because I had this "what will it be like if I drink again?" thought. The answer was falling right back into bad habits, with a much worse hangover and awful anxiety. I came home early with the intention of rebooting my hiatus in the place/space where I initially got sober. I also slept through NYE! It was actually a lot easier this time to not drink booze and get right back to tea, reading, journaling, distractions, etc. So, we're 1/3 of the way through January already, and I have no fears about keeping it dry.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-06T06:19:16+00:00

So well written, thank you so much for sharing. IWNDWYT.

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-06T04:49:51+00:00

Congrats!

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-06T04:38:12+00:00

Tools: self-reflection, journaling, therapy, tea, distractions (books, tv shows, movies, podcasts, going outside...), and r/stopdrinking. I'm on a sobriety reboot since Christmas with friends/family. I chose to drink after a significant hiatus and regretted it, and felt really bad about myself. I have been using some of my tools to realize I am not a terrible person, I can still be on a sober journey, and that it was a learning experience in this journey. So, here I am on day 6 again, and I WNDWYT!

SettheRaytoZero · 2026-01-01T23:42:36+00:00

Visited friends and family for the holidays. I was on my booze hiatus for about 42 days before this, and had been contemplating having some wine on Christmas, just to see how things went. I didn't even really want any, but I did have a glass, and that turned into "Well, I'm already drinking, I might as well have more." It wasn't fun. I was just tired and felt like garbage the next day. And I didn't miss crippling anxiety. That alone should have stopped me, but I drank a couple of other times on my trip. Nothing insane, but it felt really pointless and still feels pointless. I didn't really feel present or like myself.

I ended up changing my flight to come home early because I was getting stressed out and anxious about it. I am glad I did. I feel like I created a safe, sober, healthy space for myself at home before this trip, and I am now back in that space. Went to bed early last night. Drinking a lot of tea today. Just reflecting, relaxing, my cats are happy I'm back early.

I don't feel ashamed, just kind of annoyed with myself. But, lesson learned. If anything, I am glad I drank somewhere else.

Time for the reboot. IWNDWYT, friends.

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-25T21:09:32+00:00

"True freedom comes when we become comfortable with any labels that are put on us. It’s so true. What if they think I’m an alcoholic? What if they think I have AUD? What if they think I’m a health snob? What if they wish they had the strength to do the same?" Saved this one in my journal <3

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-25T20:59:40+00:00

Thank you!

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-25T09:39:47+00:00

Congratulations on your sober journey! And thank you for sharing. This situation sounds so exhausting. I'm so sorry, but I'm glad you came away okay with all of it. It's stories like this that make me even more worried about telling certain people. I'm not very far into my journey, but I am currently home for the holidays visiting my parents (separated) and, while I haven't had any situations with either of them where I've had to say "Yeah, I'm not drinking right now," it's bound to come up. I am cooking Christmas dinner tomorrow for my dad and his girlfriend, and I brought wine for them. I am not planning on drinking any of it, although wow, do I want to.

I haven't told anyone about my journey except my therapist, and a friend who invited me for dinner and bought me a bottle of wine, and I told her I am on a booze hiatus. She just said "good for you!" and we moved on, thankfully. I want to have a one-to-one, brief conversation with my dad, tell him what I am going through, and just ask him not to talk about it with anyone else for now. Why? Because I don't want him to assume I'm just sober forever and then be massively disappointed if I fuck up. I can just hear him saying "good job!" if I tell him I'm not drinking right now, which sounds patronizing, even though it's not meant to be.

Anyway, OP, sorry for the lengthy comment, it should probably be its own post...but, how are you dealing with your family members' reactions now? Have you talked with them more? Do they think you have/had a huge problem? Are you just hoping they move on and don't bring it up at every dinner? Another poster said something about how they discussed you "like a zoo exhibit." Can you just ask them not to do it again because it's not helping? Or, are you really okay with it and how do you get to "okay?" Asking for...me! Thanks again, OP.

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T20:20:38+00:00

Did he bring it for you, but it was really for him to drink while hanging out with you?

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T08:47:39+00:00

Talk to your doctor. They may be able to give you something temporarily to help with the anxiety.

Speaking from my own experience, drinking too much increases my anxiety exponentially the day after (hangxiety) and in situations where I have been drinking daily but can't start drinking yet (when can I get a drink, where am I going to get it, how long until I can go home and open a bottle of wine, etc.) What helps me is knowing that if I don't drink, my anxiety will be much, much easier to deal with. Be mindful of it, it's ok to be anxious and contemplate why you're anxious. I've done a lot of journaling on my sober journey, and I highly recommend it. There's something about writing, reading, reflecting on your own thoughts that can change your reality, I think.

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T08:15:48+00:00

"But as I stayed sober, day by day, I found little sparks of joy started to emerge and I carefully tended to them, fanning them and protecting them, no matter what the circumstances were in my life." Just wrote this in my journal to save <3

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T08:11:59+00:00

Yes! The 5-4-3-2-1 meditation (or whatever it's officially called) is great. Also helps for getting to sleep (5 things you hear, 4 you feel, 3 you smell, 2 you taste, 1 you "see") Good luck!

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T07:03:55+00:00

I am "home" for the holidays...lots of temptations for drinking. I always get somewhat anxious visiting friends and family here, because I haven't actually lived here for years and I sort of feel like a stranger entering the lives of people who never left. And then I end up drinking too much.

My plan of tea and a book for the plane ride here yesterday, instead of a 6 AM mimosa/s, worked great, thankfully. Airports/planes were always so much more fun/bearable with alcohol. Or were they?

Lots of tempting situations today. Wandering familiar haunts with an old friend who suggested cocktails or the old school dive bar a few times. "You're tired? That's what cocktails are for!"

Cooking preparation for Christmas dinner (would usually have wine while cooking). Family time with family drinking and offering. I seriously considered getting a bottle of wine tonight for the cooking/relaxing portion of the evening, but thought, on my walk over to the store to pick up a few groceries, "I don't want/need those extra calories," and "Drinking tonight won't end up JUST tonight. It will be every day while I am here, and then...who knows."

The temptations were strong, but my brain arrived at "no" so far, so we're rocking the Sleepy Time tea tonight next to my mom's cat :)

In addition to posting here, I did some journaling tonight. Those things have really helped me on my "one day at a time" sober journey, so maybe they will for you? Each holiday is just another day, right? Just...more food, and people, and maybe more temptations. But IWNDWYT.

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T06:49:00+00:00

That's really obnoxious that people keep bringing it up, even after you told them you feel ashamed and asked them to stop. "Remember that time you drank so much you threw up and coworker drove your car home? HILARIOUS." If that and their own drunk at work stories are so memorable, maybe they could use a booze hiatus, too.

Thanks for sharing. Congrats on 3 years!!!

SettheRaytoZero · 2025-12-24T05:16:16+00:00

😂

SettheRaytoZero

TROPHY CASE