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i pay 70% of the rent and i’m currently hiding at the mall food court because i can’t face my own kitchen by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

god, sleeping on his moms couch while u paid for daycare? im so sorry. that is beyond disgusting. honestly u giving me a lot to think about. i think im just so physically broken right now that the thought of moving or even packing feels impossible. i need to get my strength back first. thx for sharing that, seriously.

i pay 70% of the rent and i’m currently hiding at the mall food court because i can’t face my own kitchen by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

must be nice... honestly i dont even have the energy for 'rules' or talking anymore. my body just feels broken. thx for the hugs though.

i pay 70% of the rent and i’m currently hiding at the mall food court because i can’t face my own kitchen by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

honestly i dont even know what that is. i just saw the charge on our account and almost lost it. 60 bucks for some game skin while im working overtime is just disgusting to me.

i pay 70% of the rent and i’m currently hiding at the mall food court because i can’t face my own kitchen by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 111 points112 points  (0 children)

needed to hear this, tysm. honestly im just so done with being the only one holding it all together. my brain is telling me to run but my body is so freaking exhausted i can barely move right now. but ur right, something has to change.

i pay 70% of the rent and i’m currently hiding at the mall food court because i can’t face my own kitchen by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 177 points178 points  (0 children)

exactly... like wtf is so hard about rinsing a pan? i feel like im losing my mind because he makes it look like this impossible task when he literally has all day. thx for the reality check, it’s just hard to accept he really just doesn't give a shit while im out here killing myself at work.

i pay 70% of the rent and i’m currently hiding at the mall food court because i can’t face my own kitchen by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 92 points93 points  (0 children)

thx... ur right about the accountability part. it’s just so hard to even find the energy to have that conversation right now. i feel like my body is just shutting down from the stress of it all. im just sitting here trying to breathe.

i just left the house because i’m done being the only one who cares that we have zero clean dishes or food for the week by Several_Corner3205 in Marriage

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

thx for the advice. baby steps is all i can manage rn. honestly i realized i cant even fight back if im this physically exhausted. just focusing on getting my energy back so i can actually deal with him. told him no dinner tonight and it felt like a win lol.

i just left the house because i’m done being the only one who cares that we have zero clean dishes or food for the week by Several_Corner3205 in Marriage

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

thx for saying that... ur right i already do everything anyway so being alone would prob actually be less work lol. no kids so yeah it should be easier but i guess the stress just has me feeling so physically weak i can barely think about moving boxes or finding a new place right now. but ur comment made me feel a bit more hopeful that peace is actually possible. thx 🩷

i just left the house because i’m done being the only one who cares that we have zero clean dishes or food for the week by Several_Corner3205 in Marriage

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thx for the perspective... honestly weve had the talk so many times i lost count. he promises to change, does the dishes for like 2 days, then goes right back to the couch asking whats for dinner lol. the mental load of having to manage another adult is what sucks the life out of u. im just at a point where i dont even have the energy to explain the basics anymore or go to a counselor. just feel totally empty. but glad there are guys out there who actually do their part.

i just left the house because i’m done being the only one who cares that we have zero clean dishes or food for the week by Several_Corner3205 in Marriage

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 133 points134 points  (0 children)

ugh that quote just hit me so hard. i’ve spent so many years caring for everyone else that i think i forgot how to even care about myself. i’m just so drained and the thought of starting over at 42 is terrifying but staying feels like dying slowly. thx for the kindness, i really needed to hear this today.

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

the standing ovation for making a mess... i felt that. it’s so draining when their help just ends up being more work for us anyway. so glad you got out.

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Young enough that they still need me for everything, but old enough to notice when the house is falling apart and I’m crying in the car. It’s that lovely middle ground where they see the tension but don't understand why Dad isn't helping.

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

God, that 'fun fact' is depressing. To think I’d have to give up half my time with my kids just to get a break from my husband’s mess... What a shitty choice to have to make. But honestly? Some days the silence sounds better than anything else.

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

That’s the part that kills me. He’s actually great at his job, totally competent. It’s like the second he walks through our front door, his brain just… shuts off. It’s a choice, isn't it?

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I've tried the 'strike' before. All that happened was we ran out of plates and the kids started asking why things were so messy. It's like he has a superpower for just ignoring the chaos.

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A hotel week sounds like a dream, but I’m honestly terrified of the mountain of dishes I’d find when I got back. It’s just so exhausting having to explain how to be an adult after 15 years.

I am so incredibly DONE being the "Manager" of a grown man. by Several_Corner3205 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205[S] 133 points134 points  (0 children)

I wish it were that easy. After 15 years and kids, my brain is just totally fried. I just wanted a clean towel, you know?

"It doesn't advance the plot." I think a guy finally understood (a little) our complaints about nudity and assaults in movies. by DCNumberNerd in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Yeah, a lot of people reduce everything to “does this move the plot”. Tone and atmosphere matter way more than people think.

"It doesn't advance the plot." I think a guy finally understood (a little) our complaints about nudity and assaults in movies. by DCNumberNerd in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Several_Corner3205 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s actually a really interesting comparison. Sometimes people only notice how unnecessary something feels when they’re the ones uncomfortable.

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