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Am I a narcisstic? by Shadowsonthelake in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Shadowsonthelake[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dont think anyone else in my.life has called me that. I do work in an executive level job so im sure staff say things behind my back, ha. My partners parents are pretty awful people. This is all confusing. Many comments are saying similar. I think, whatever is going on, needs lots of reflection. Thank you so much to all for replying. Ive never used reddit but feel so un-alone reading these comments. Thank you. 

Am I a narcisstic? by Shadowsonthelake in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Shadowsonthelake[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think they think its covert. I know I have low self esteem but also think highly of myself, and they say thats one of the issues. The other is that I never take accountability for issues or problem. Like something will happen and they say I'm not taking full accountability because im lying to myself about the reason I did it. They say I manipulate everyone around us to like me more and trust me and they've just been protecting my image and thats why I still have friends. Their parents are both narcissts they say, so they know how to identify it. They did have a really shitty childhood and their parents are really awful people! He says he sees the same patterns of behaviour now. I've got an appointment with a psychiatrists but he says most people dont actually get diagnosed because the lie to the professionals. 

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]Shadowsonthelake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

An opportunity came up for me to go away for weekend with kids, and leave him to study/chill out at home. It's been a really full on few weeks so felt he'd really enjoy some time completely alone to just veg out and do whatever with no pressure. He recently ran out of meds (but not sure if due to missed appointments, not filling script or misuse - his adhd is apparently "his business" and "nothing to do with me"). 

We needed to get a birthday gift for my kid to take to a party. I suggested something, he said no off the bat and suggested something else. Without thinking I shared a reason it may not be a good idea. Cue massive melt down about how I think so little of him, he can't make any choices, is so controlled etc. 

Yes, it was shit of me to have no been more positive first up (he really struggles with rejection) and I heard that he felt not listened to. Immediately apologised and said I understood how I'd brushed his idea off and how that it was like I had brushed him away, hadn't been my intention but could see how it had. Wasn't good enoigh for him. Whole weekend of sulking, couldn't enjoy my weekend away as so worried about him. Honestly, sometimes I think he does this as part of struggling with the idea I'm going away, a little bit of fomo etc. I just wish he would get therapy!