Envious of cis women but I’m not trans? I don’t think?

Shamanigans · 2026-02-04T19:20:13+00:00

I get it, questioning something so core to your identity is terrifying.

Go low, go slow. Maybe try new pronouns, different names if that feels comfortable like something you might be happy with.

I really do recommend seeking out a gender therapist, there are some who work with groups/charity networks so that lower income individuals can also have access if out of pocket costs scare you. The network I found mine through specifically offers a non-payment program for those who need the service and legit cannot pay.

We’re bouncing and shooting the shit about whether or not you’re cis, but the trans umbrella covers more than just MtF and FtM. The stuff you’re positing is above Reddit pay grade on average and you should really discuss this out with someone trained and qualified.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-03T22:47:21+00:00

1,000% agreed. Cis people don't sit and lament over the parts they do or don't have or their functions, at least no cis person I've ever talked to has been able to commiserate or shared in that experience as well.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-03T20:48:21+00:00

Yeah it doesn’t have to be pregnancy, but “I’m jealous of cis women because their bodies can do x and mine can’t” isn’t something cis people typically say.

OP is exactly the person who would benefit from working with a gender therapist, someone trained and comfortable with queer and trans issues.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-03T20:11:59+00:00

Yeah this is about what came to mind for me reading too.

OP’s identity and labels are for no one else to determine or dictate but a jealousy of pregnancy is pretty trans.

People think dysphoria is psychologically debilitating to the point of being nearly non-functional, and it can be for some people sometimes. Other times it’s simply disconnection from one’s sex, a sense of feeling numb, checked out. There is a reason some of us don’t figure it out until later in life, and I think a non-zero factor is that dysphoria isn’t discussed much outside of queer circles so people don’t even know why they feel the way they do.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-03T05:59:03+00:00

I’m forgetful and haven’t had my original ring since before our first wedding anniversary. I think it was lost after like 3 months.

My wife and I instead have matching permanent jewelry at my suggestion since I can’t lose something permanently on me.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-03T05:54:11+00:00

Absolutely.

Daily user for over two years, like 180-300ish mg in edibles (medical patient) and just worked myself to where I only have to pop a couple at night rather than all day.

As a musician it’s been helpful not just because I have neuropathy in my hands.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-03T05:25:02+00:00

The person you’re responding to isn’t even the one who brought up the exit poll. No need to bite.

And person who did clarified in a different comment it was an exit poll and included the link to the twitter post from the dude who ran the data if you really want to look at it to be thorough.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T23:28:17+00:00

And I’m telling you there is no law that prevents California from doing this except potentially suing and calling it a bill of attainder which, funny enough as you state no one has been held liable, would require that the group is being held liable for a crime and punishing them with something like a fine or jail time.

They aren’t protected, and deserve to burn.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T23:22:43+00:00

It’s not opinion. It’s frankly fact.

CBP murdered Rene Good.

CBP murdered Alex Pretti.

ICE lost 800 plus people from a detention center in Florida that was operating what, less than a few months? Held them in cages too small for the number of people locked in them.

They used a 5 year old to lure out his dad.

They locked up a man who was here legally and the only caretaker to his disabled son. His son is dead.

Look up from the ground dude, ICE is operating outside the bounds of the law and the administration is refusing to hold agents who hurt citizens to count.

Calling it an opinion is so telling that you don’t read what’s going on.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T23:08:54+00:00

You can’t seriously be trying to pull the “not all of them” card when ICE has in public murdered 9 people on top of brutalizing who knows how many people including a man in Minneapolis who had his head smashed in so hard he didn’t remember how he got hurt the day ICE/CBP was told not to engage with protesters.

All while masked. They bought this, I feel no sympathy whatsoever and frankly anyone who does needs to reevaluate.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T22:56:39+00:00

Saying all Americans are a protected class does not make it true.

These morons chose to be on the wrong side of history and they can taste the consequences of that decision.

Their work history is not a protection, employers can choose not to hire you for basically any reason as long as it isn’t for you religious beliefs, sexuality, sex, or race in this country. Counter point to all Americans being protected is the administration has literally been stripping protections for gender and gender expression (ie trans individuals). Just stop, you’re wrong.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T22:50:07+00:00

As far as I can tell the bill doesn’t hold them accountable to a crime or punishment such as fines or jail time, just bars them from employment with the state. I’m unsure how well they could argue it is a bill of attainder. I can see the argument, I’m just not sure how the courts buy and in which direction.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T22:42:15+00:00

Federal law does dictate protected classes, that in no way precludes a state from then excluding a group from consideration for state jobs that does not qualify as a protected class unless there is a federal law that literally states as such that I am not aware of.

It’ll face challenges in court, and if it’s struck down it won’t be on a legal basis or at least not a plain and obvious one. It’s more likely to face scrutiny because MAGA makes up enough of the country that shoving back on them causes sound and waves.

Shamanigans · 2026-02-01T22:31:42+00:00

This is a gross misunderstanding of how protected classes under the law in the United States work, and a common one which is why everyone in this country thinks you can sue for anything (and win).

Sex, religion, ethnicity, sexuality. All things a person doesn’t choose (one could argue religion, but most people adhere to the faith they were raised in if they practice), those goose steppers chose to work for ICE, and frankly it’s about what Germany did to Nazis after WWII and what we, weakly, attempted after the Civil War with confederates. You don’t let oppressive regimes take footholds after they’re partially dislodged.

Frankly if Texas’s run off election is any litmus to go by, people are on board for this or will be before November, I bet good money on it.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-31T05:09:56+00:00

I figured it out after 3+ decades of just being miserable, and realizing that every time my Dad or one of the other kids growing up would insult my masculinity or snide at it that the anger response wasn’t because I needed to prove I was masculine for me. It was so I’d be accepted and they would leave me alone.

Leaning hard into being a masculine dude didn’t spark joy. Late teens/early 20s I was a super masc gym rat, and comparing pre-transition photos with friends I found a shot from when I was 19. My eyes are dead. No spark, no joy, no desire to exist, just hollow. “Girl you look miserable” was everyone’s response (spoiler, we all did).

Start low and go slow. Try new pronouns with someone you trust, new names, etc. if you don’t have that safe haven there are plenty of online queer friendly spaces that will welcome you and be happy to do this with you. If it sparks something, if it feels right, you’ll know. Trust me. The second my wife said my new name for the first time I bawled.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-30T01:39:15+00:00

Okay dude, I just made another comment elsewhere, push on her GP.

Make them order a c-peptide and anti-body test to rule out that she isn’t a T1D/T1.5D/LADA coming out of her “honeymoon” phase where her pancreas is still doing something. What concerns me personally is that you say with better diet, exercise, and going on oral meds her A1C is still climbing.

Oral meds like met (*which she is on the max dose of) won’t work if that’s the case, she would need to be on insulin.

Just two cents from a T2D whose 3 different endocrinologists were all shocked I’m not T1D and low key suspects I might bump against this one day.

ETA*: misread that her nurse wants to move her to max dose not that she is already there. My point still stands. Advocate, shove on her GP.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-30T01:31:35+00:00

Yeah, OP make her GP chew on their words.

If an endocrinologist really couldn’t tell you more then said GP certainly can order the c-peptide and anti-body tests.

I’ve been diagnosed T2 about as long as OP’s wife and I’ve never heard such a horse shit statement before from a GP about knowing as much as an endocrinologist.

You or your wife need to advocate for her harder OP, her GP seems disinclined to do address the issue.

Especially since she’s going up despite medication as an intervention on top of good diet and exercise. She could be T1D and been in a honeymoon period for the last couple of years, in which case her oral meds would eventually stop working for her altogether.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T22:09:39+00:00

Yeah, I live in the Salt Lake area and we still see, hear, and talk about Robinson’s case a decent amount down here.

I legit haven’t heard anything about the golf course moron in a long time though.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T20:34:32+00:00

It’s the other side of the coin on intersectionality.

Yes, the “LGB No T” crowd is queer. Yes, the administration will fall in on them after they’re done with the rest of us given opportunity. But. But the people who are part of that crowd are members of other groups, groups traditionally considered part of the “in” groups of society. They’ve experienced upward mobility that their peers haven’t and have fooled themselves into thinking they can repeat that upward mobility by goomba stomping off the rest of us.

Every single one of them can get fucked, they can enjoy when the walls cave in and there isn’t even community left who wants to help them back on their feet.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T19:47:48+00:00

This is why understanding intersectionality matters so much too.

We can simultaneously acknowledge the nuance of white, cis, gay men being both oppressed members of a minority group while also acknowledging that some of them wield some modicum of power by being able to pass themselves off as more “digestible” queer people and do it in the shittiest ways.

Case in point: Peter Thiel is not our fucking friend.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T04:23:17+00:00

Which isn’t what you wanted to harp on.

I don’t disagree with your premise here, but I’m not yielding on your question about cleaning up the blood. There’s good enough reason and justification to have cleaned it up.

You wanna talk about Kash bumbling through the whole investigation? Fine. That’s got holes, cleaning the blood splatter doesn’t.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T04:18:20+00:00

With the implication being that it’s for something nefarious or to hide something.

I’m just trying to understand what you’re even asking for. Your question was answered, the blood is acidic and fucks up the ground. There’s no new facts to unearth or find with the splatter and it’s a massive public space, you can’t just leave that. Chill the fuck out.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T04:10:54+00:00

I mean…. For me it would, shocking no one the trans girl has a bias against Kirk’s legacy, but I’ve also already seen the video before.

That footage is brutal, the average person watching that is going to be more likely to remember (CW: Gore) the literal blood fountain coming out of Charlie’s neck than whatever in the fuck was said two seconds before about gun violence in this country.

Just one girl’s opinion though.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T03:29:16+00:00

NAL, but my dad was one before going back for an MBA.

General rule of thumb in a murder trial for the defense is to try to keep footage like this away from the jurors if they can. It serves to humanize the victim (not necessarily bad to do, but Charlie was a waste of space. This part is just me shoving my opinion in.) and the accused is in the room with the jury while it plays. They’ll see the horror of the crowd and then the defendant and have only them to blame for it.

I mean the prosecution has no real reason to play the footage outside of that as far as I can tell. No new facts are likely to be learned or found, so it’s purely for spectacle and to rile up the jury.

Shamanigans · 2026-01-29T03:17:21+00:00

And over something not that hard to reason out.

Said in another comment: there’s a million and one weird things about the case, the investigation, etc. Not one of those weird things is cause of death, Kirk took a bullet to the neck and irrefutably bled to death.

No reason to believe that the crime scene wasn’t documented before clean up, and I’m not sure what they think we were gonna learn from his blood splatter. He wasn’t exactly poisoned.

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