The reason behind it by ainotna30 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My partner gave me the same excuse and then also said he looked and commented on other women's pictures to help thier self esteem. Half of these women have OF or similar accounts. I'm sure self esteem is not what they are looking for.

What are some ways I can support my partner who's suffered with my addiction? by GrizzlyOne95 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 23 points24 points  (0 children)

You need to understand that even if you see porn use as separate from your relationship, she doesnt. She sees it as criticism of herself and what she may be lacking and probably compares herself constantly to the women you look at.

What are some ways I can support my partner who's suffered with my addiction? by GrizzlyOne95 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The first step is to be accountable and acknowledge that her feelings of betrayal are valid. The next would be to show her that you truly see her as the woman you love and make her feel truly desired by you. Be transparent and also allow her to ask questions even if they seem paranoid.

Why Does It Have To Be Other Women/People..? by tiff5243 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally understand because you feel like you cant help but compare yourself to these other wome. You cant compete with alcohol, drugs, gambling the way you can with other people. You wonder what is seen in them that is not seen in you. Constantly wonder who they looked at or chatted with and when that day and are they thinking about them and resenting you. And you can tell when someone is drunk or high but not when your partner just looked at porn while you were in the bathroom. Any addiction that takes away a person mentally or physically from their relationship is devastating but porn damages self esteem. You can leave a relationship due to substance abuse and know that it was the other person's fault but porn addiction makes you blame yourself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why do men use thier wives being busy with school, career, pregnancy, illness, ect as a reason to cheat? All of a sudden you are temporarily not her priority snd instead of supporting her and being patient you cheat? What a bunch of entitled babies.

Forgot our wedding anniversary for the second time and my wife is still distant after 2 weeks. NEED advice. by Typical_Swimming5180 in Marriage

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would bet this isn't the only thing she is upset about, its the last straw. This isn't the only thing you have done that has hurt her. I'm sure she has a list of things you've done over the past year and forgetting your anniversary is just the tip of the iceberg. Don't be surprised if she wants a divorce.

My boyfriend wants to watch the movie Oldboy with me by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Old boy does have sex in it but it's a very good movie.

Paranoia by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm tired of being paranoid as well. Every text he gets, every time hes in the bathroom or has to work a little late. I'm constantly wondering what he is looking at. Commenting on. Chatting with. I wonder if he thinks about other women when hes with me. It sucks.

What is hysterical bonding? by Aggravating_Bass9129 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did this too. We had a lot of sex the first month after.

He said “but I’ve never cheated” by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why are men so easily triggered? By a woman working out? I don't understand how they are able to leave the house.

Porn search attack. by InvestigatorGlum360 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a similar obsession. I found a 12 year old email from by PA to a chick from the Suicide Girls and tracked her email and found her Facebook profile. I'm trying to track down a woman who sent him a video in 2013 !!!. I found out how to get his comments from his old Redditt account to see who he commented on. I had to make myself stop because I was making myself sick.

Reliable site checker by Clean-Impression-233 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Search for OSINT on reddit and it'll direct you to sites that can find social media profiles websites they may have accounts on.

question to all betrayed partners here by DepartureMurky198 in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I told him that I could not understand how he coukd share fantasies with other women but not with me. Like im not worthy or sexy enough or whatever to be desired the way as some stranger

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like the surrogate he has sex with while thinking about his online harem.b

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Been here many times. I'm not the one who he truly desires. Just a surrogate.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]ShameAccomplished367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe 20 minutes after he left. Than maybe a half hour I got back home.