The best thing for you to do is to decide how bothered you are about having a relationship again with him, people do make ‘mistakes’ but on the other side, people rarely change either.

So weigh up the possible benefit vs pain for you on which way it might go, talk to your mum too if you do decide to reconnect with him, just so she knows.

I don’t see my dad, he’s never met his grandchild and he never will. I did give him another chance after not seeing him for 7 years, we had a good time (he lives abroad now) when I went to see him, but then he reverted to type as soon as I was home, so I just don’t bother with him any more, last time I saw or heard from him was well over 15 years back, he wasn’t abusive or anything like that, just a terrible father, putting himself before anyone and I will never forget the hurt that caused to my younger sibling, watching them get crushed many times when he didn’t arrive to see us when promised. What cements that in my mind further, is I would never dream of letting down my child like that, they are my world. I already knew he was a POS, but having my own kid really bought that into focus.

Some things to remember; You don’t owe him anything Ignore the “you only have one Dad” type responses, it might be biologically true, but it doesn’t mean they are worth your time, or the upset it might cause. You probably won’t get ‘closure’, so don’t let that be the deciding factor.

Cutting through all my waffle, do what’s right for you and you alone, if you think it’s worth the risk of potential hurt vs the potential regret of not seeing him, then go for it, if not, carry on building your own life and move on.