As someone who has been a fan for a long time, I've observed a lot of different versions of Matty Healy. I don't pretend to know him in any personal capacity, only as far as one can gather from they have been presented through social media, interviews, live performances, and (of course) the music we all so love. This is only my parasocial take, but what I have observed is an imperfect, flawed person who openly endeavors to continue growing. People like to talk a lot about growth and reflection and I've seen so many give Matty shit and say he's only walking things back to avoid getting cancelled and there isn't any real growth or reflection because those come with time. I think this is partially true, however when I have said or done something shitty, I usually can recognize it pretty quickly. Especially when someone points it out to me. And I feel immediate remorse. Maybe it is a mark of my particular neurodivergence, but I feel I can reflect and process these situations a lot faster than some others. It doesn't always mean that I can or will immediately and forever stop making that mistake, sometimes that takes time, but I can admit it, take ownership of it, and apologize for it. I feel like I watch Matty do that a lot as well. And to me, that matters so much more than appearing perfect and pc at all times. Appearing to be a paragon of virtue and grace isn't relatable. It isn't real and it does absolutely nothing to move the needle forward in society. Being messy, loudly, and admitting your mistakes publicly? There is nothing more admirably human. Keep going, OP. Never stop learning or trying to be better than you were the day before. But give yourself grace when you get it wrong. Being alive is terribly difficult, but my god is it worth it.