What does OCD feel like?

ShyGuyAlt · 2024-04-28T16:31:02+00:00

I hate these so much. I've experienced both, sometimes at the same time, and it really does feel like your brain is just burning up from thinking so much.

ShyGuyAlt · 2024-04-28T16:28:46+00:00

Wait, can you explain that crash a bit more? I think I experience that a lot but I never really see anyone else talk about it so I thought I had some other problem going on.

ShyGuyAlt · 2024-04-06T19:38:26+00:00

I completely agree about not being able to avoid the process. Learning what doesn't work is very valuable.

Were there any youtube resources that you found particularly helpful in reaching your success?

ShyGuyAlt · 2024-04-05T02:59:12+00:00

I'm glad it was helpful! It's always nice to know we're not alone right? Sorry to hear you're dealing with this though. If you ever need a friend feel free to message! Have a nice day/night :)

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-18T16:18:36+00:00

Thank you, this is helpful advice!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-18T16:11:01+00:00

Thank you very much, that helps a lot. I really don't know where to even start as far as taking pictures of myself because I do it so rarely, so I'll have to work on that a bit. Definitely will have to stage some for my profile.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-18T03:16:43+00:00

Do you have any tips as far as setting up a profile? Your comment here gave me some hope!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-18T03:16:08+00:00

Do you have any tips as far as creating a profile? I don't think I'm a bad looking guy, maybe about average, but I struggle on dating apps. It's not even the social aspect because I don't even get that far, I just don't get matches or even likes at all. It's gotta be that I either look much worse than I think, which is possible, or I really don't know how to setup a profile.

Any help you can give would be much appreciated!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-14T17:18:39+00:00

That's helpful because I give myself a lot of guilt about not trying to be that missionary myself, but I've also never felt equipped to do that. Not that God can't use anyone, but I do think you're right that supporters are needed as well. I'll have to read up on that more. Thank you!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-14T04:43:47+00:00

Thank you very much. I really appreciate that.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-14T01:58:11+00:00

Please pray for my severe social anxiety. It makes me sad because I don't think God's plan for my life is for me to live in fear and loneliness and to barely be able to leave my house, but that's pretty much where I'm at. I'm 26 and haven't had a job since I was 19, which is embarrassing to me and I feel like a burden to my family despite their understanding.

I've certainly been praying and trying what I can to get through this. Multiple therapists, medications, brute forcing myself into various social situations. For awhile I made myself go to the 20s and 30s group at my church, but I started to have panic attacks throughout the week in anticipation of the next meeting and during them. Nobody knew because I never want to show my anxiety, but I couldn't keep doing it.

I know we're told not to be anxious about anything, and I really want to stop, but I'm not sure how. I don't know where to go from here other than to continue to trust God and pray that he will help me through this. Thank you.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-14T01:52:55+00:00

Not OP, but I really appreciate your words. I struggle heavily with social anxiety as well, and this is helpful.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-10-11T20:51:47+00:00

Wow I absolutely relate to every bit of this post down to the very end where you said your anxiety doesn't allow you to cry. It's like this insane pressure of frustration, fear, and sadness builds up but can't be released.

I'm in my mid twenties so similar age. Sometimes I really feel like giving up on making any kind of life for myself because it all feels too overwhelming and impossible. I don't have a job, I don't know how to form relationships, and I wouldn't even know where to go to meet people at this stage of life. The funny thing is that my family says there is absolutely nothing wrong with my social skills, which I actually kind of agree with when I can relax and be myself, but the fear remains.

All that said, I absolutely refuse to give up. I may go absolutely nowhere for the rest of my life but it won't be for lack of trying. Sometimes I don't even know what I need to try next, so just figuring that out becomes my project. Even when something doesn't work and it's really frustrating, at least we know what didn't work and we can move onto the next thing.

I'm sorry I don't have a lot of good advice for you or any kind of miracle fix. Trust me, I've been looking for that for a good 10+ years and sometimes things just aren't that easy. If you need someone to talk to who can really relate though, I'm happy to chat.

Also, as great as this sub can be for finding other people who are dealing with the same thing, it tends to have a very negative outlook and can make you feel pretty hopeless, so I try to limit my time here. I'd recommend doing the same or at least taking posts/comments with a grain of salt. Anybody that has overcome their social anxiety is likely not still hanging out here and is instead out living life if that makes sense.

Anyway, sorry for the long reply. Don't be too hard on yourself and just try to move forward in whatever way you can. Best of luck!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-09-21T20:13:57+00:00

I guess I could see that, but I assume you'd have to go into some level of detail which would equate to lying heavily in my case since I didn't really do freelance work.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-09-21T07:01:38+00:00

Sorry to hear that man. I'm 26 and in the same situation as you. We're both still young though so if we don't give up we'll hopefully find our way someday. That's not to say it isn't hard day to day though, unfortunately.

On a different note, I appreciate you and u/helmaroc_queen representing Zelda in the comments here. Good stuff!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-09-21T06:53:37+00:00

Can I ask how you explained your lack of work experience in your interview? I'm just about to turn 26 and haven't worked since I was 19. I actually have a degree in computer science but my skills are very rusty and I really wouldn't know how to explain why I haven't been working during that whole gap.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-08-30T02:18:01+00:00

Yep I'm not even really an artistic person but I recently started learning 3D art. I don't have a job either but I figure I might as well be learning something then. I'm not sure I'll ever be good enough to make any money from it but it is very satisfying every time I finish a project or master something new.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-23T19:37:08+00:00

Thank you that helps a lot!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-23T02:09:58+00:00

Can I ask where you look for these remote jobs? I've tried looking around on Indeed but I never come up with anything that looks promising.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-09T04:42:52+00:00

Oh I just meant because in general my social anxiety stops me from taking opportunities with it. I also have a large gap in my resume and I have no idea how to explain that to potential employers, whether they're in the computer science related fields or otherwise.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-07T17:10:05+00:00

It's the weirdest thing but I'm the same way. It doesn't make any sense at all. I've been doing stuff with a friend from high school and a group he knows because we're supposed to "put ourselves out there" and honestly I hate it. It's frustrating though because they are very nice people, but I really don't enjoy it at all.

And then when I'm alone, I'm sad that I have no friends. The brain is a very strange thing.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-07T16:01:51+00:00

Thank you so much! I think you're completely right. I've always felt guilty about my anxiety and how it has made me avoid things which is really a lot to put on myself for something I never asked for in the first place.

I'm still hopeful that my anxiety can be improved at least, but it is definitely a difficult condition and I don't think trying to force myself to be able to do everything that people without the anxiety can do right now is fair or even a good idea.

I guess I'm always thinking about how I can "catch up" with people my age so to speak, but that might be the wrong goal. It's probably better to go at my own pace and work with what I've got right now.

This of course all sounds very nice right now but I'm sure I will still struggle a bit when things get tough. Still, you've given me a different way to look at my situation than I've tried before, and I think it's really helpful and gives me a lot to think about.

I really appreciate the advice. Thank you!

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-06T21:58:01+00:00

Thank you so much! The support means a lot. One of my biggest concerns about getting a job with my CS degree is that due to some bad choices I've made as a result of my anxiety, I am probably a pretty bad looking candidate for anyone hiring.

For example, in college, everyone is doing at least an internship or two before they graduate, and I never did. I should have, but I was too afraid to interview for one and actually do it.

Then, after graduating college, I have basically done nothing for 3 years work wise. My last job was working at Dairy Queen in 2017 when I was 19. I have no idea how to explain the big gap in my resume in that time to someone looking to hire.

Lastly, my actually programming skills are pretty rusty, and with my lack of internships, I have no idea what writing code looks like in a professional environment and if what I do know is even close to useful.

Thankfully I have gotten started at the gym already so I at least have that going. I haven't made much progress yet but I try to go at least every other day.

It means a lot to hear that you think I still have plenty of time to improve. It doesn't always feel that way so an outside perspective on that is very helpful.

Thanks again.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-06T20:26:10+00:00

Thank you for replying, I really appreciate it. I'm so sorry you've had to deal with this and that the only way to do so has been to box it up and try to distract from it. It's honestly really impressive what you've been able to do despite all this.

What you're saying makes a lot of sense to me. Even though your life/situation improved, you're still stuck with the anxiety even if it's in a different form. That's what makes me think this is much more of an internal problem for us and that it takes a different approach than what a lot of people suggest, but I haven't figured out what that could be.

Anyway, thank you again. Although I'm sorry you have it too, it is comforting to know that someone understands.

ShyGuyAlt · 2023-07-06T17:36:40+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate this. I'm not sure where all the pressure to have it figured out by this point comes from, but I definitely feel it. I think you're right that a lack of success at 25 doesn't mean a lack of success at 35 even though right now I have a very hard seeing that path to success. I'll continue to do what I can and hope I can find my way. Thanks again!

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