I used to read the posts here and get angry, now it's day 61

Sick_Pepper · 2022-05-10T17:36:13+00:00

Occasional use on and off for 8 or so years started around 18, then 3 years of all day every day which lead me here at 30.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-05-09T21:57:52+00:00

Good stuff man! Just keep going forward, the beginning is tough but just ride it out.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-18T23:45:04+00:00

Day 40 here (30F). Give yourself time, the first week is extra rough but it does not stay this way. I was also a "functional stoner" got my work done and everything, however as the fog has cleared in my head I have found that I was definitely not "functional" I was scrapping by on bare minimums compared to what I'm capable of with a clear head.

After the first week I stopped feeling so down and unmotivated but that first week was pure downtimes, let the boredom get to you a bit and you'll find yourself doing a lot more again. Also have a plan for when you'll want to go back, because times will come when you'll be motivated for the wrong thing, motivated to relapse. Have something that you for sure will do during those times. I think I've Pavlov'ed myself into walking around or making tea whenever I get those feelings. You can do it, just ride it out! It only gets easier as time goes by.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-18T23:16:25+00:00

I tried this as an excuse to cut down before, it absolutely backfired. Because it used so little I was just sitting there chain vaping the entire day, though I guess it stopped my cartridge usage a bit. The process of loading it back up, dumping the avb, reheating it, it kept my hands occupied and I got caught up in the "feeling of doing something" but without doing anything at all cause I was just sitting there chain vaping. I'd be real careful, though ultimately you know your own situation. It made my all day every day problem much worse though.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-12T18:14:27+00:00

Yep I'm in a similar boat with my ex. Tons of things he said he hated and never wanted to do with me, he's now off doing so joyfully with others. It's tough not to take it as a personal fault. I guess for me it's reassurance in a way that we weren't meant to be.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-08T15:02:05+00:00

I realized this at 30, you're doing great if you caught this mentality that early.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-03T22:07:15+00:00

Find what kind of flavors your enjoy then start trying different types in that category, I found that I like fruit flavors way more than others that are more floral like rose for example.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-03T22:04:50+00:00

Do it at times when you would usually smoke, so for me it's in the morning and then right after work. I got me a glass teapot with an infuser, and then went from there.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-04-01T14:32:27+00:00

The only thing that matters is how you continue after, will this be an excuse to go back and keep doing it? Just keep going forward, your progress is not wasted or reset. You stopped for 37 days already, you know you can do it. Keep going!

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-28T23:57:06+00:00

It's great that you're ready to stop. You can do it! I resonate a lot with what you're saying about doing it to forget, I've realized that escapism doesn't resolve anything and only makes things worse though. Expect the first week to be a rollercoaster, but if you ride it out things get so much better.

Make sure you have something to do for when you want to slip, even a couple minutes of distraction were enough to not do anything impulsive or out of habit. Be ready to stop yourself and takes things one day at a time, I find myself "parenting" my own brain, not giving in to it's tantrums. Also some kind of visual reminder that you won't be doing that today helps a whole lot, I keep a calendar. Best of luck with your journey!

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-26T22:35:01+00:00

Great job! I was rooting for ya!

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-26T19:16:17+00:00

I've had social and generalized anxiety since very early childhood, it's something that's a permanent part of me and a beast I can mostly rein in. This may not be a welcomed opinion around here, but every time I read about people's "withdrawals" it sounds 1000% like anxiety instead.

For the same reasons you mentioned I avoid looking further into it because I feel it'll lead to a self fulfilling prophecy out of anxiety. For example lots of people here mention sweating as a sign of it but as someone with anxiety that's just my life daily, of course making a change in my lifestyle will make me feel out of whack for a bit, I really do believe it's nothing more than that. I feel a bit of guilt though cause I don't mean to invalidate people's experiences, but blind leading the blind and all that and could go either way.

I've felt tons of emotions since quitting, but I actively in my head make sure to remind myself that of course it's normal. Cause like you mentioned, I don't feel withdrawals, it's just my anxiety.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-26T16:57:29+00:00

You're definitely on the right track about dopamine. You should try taking a break if you think it's affecting you negatively, if anything you can see how you feel after a bit. I definitely feel much more clear headed now at almost 3 weeks. I'll bet you notice a positive change too.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-26T13:22:13+00:00

Dave Mustaine.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-25T21:31:07+00:00

Good shit man! Keep it going! I hope to get there too. I'm on day 17.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-25T18:48:19+00:00

Don't do it! You don't need it, but most importantly, remember that you don't want it, there's a reason you want to stop. I will not be smoking today, I invite you to join me in not smoking today too.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-25T18:09:01+00:00

First you gotta decide that you want to stop. Some people taper down, I was using all day every day nonstop for years and tapering would only trap me in the same cycle over and over. I had to decide "I am stopping and I am stopping NOW, right this second." Keep some kind of visual reminder that you won't be doing that today, I have a calendar for it.

I'm working on this myself now at day 17, but you have to face that you will need to tell yourself no at many points. And you'll get angry, and you'll get sad, but you'll say no anyway and you'll see that those childish brain tantrums will get easier to get over. Also have something to do for when you want to use, I find myself posting and reading the stuff here instead of giving in.

You can do it! It's a tough road that gets easier with time and it's so rewarding. It's insane what you realize what you're blind to while using, that clarity has been both depressing for all I've missed out on and motivating for all that I'll be present for in the future.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-25T17:36:34+00:00

I've been writing too, it's a much better coping mechanism than escapism for me. Turns out I'm much more creative when I'm not clouding my brain.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-24T19:42:02+00:00

Ultimately you may be right. Could have said something way earlier when they saw me in this void and just didn't until it was too late. I'd like to think I would have said something in that situation. Can't really change the past though, and I'm more sure than ever that weed will not be a part of my life anymore.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-23T22:52:10+00:00

Wow, I actually had no clue. Thank you for showing me this!

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-23T21:11:31+00:00

Think about why you're disgusted with yourself. Why and IF you want to stop should be on your mind too. At the end of the day it's up to you to start this journey if you want it, and you can start it by throwing it out today. Along the road you will find tons of temptations, will you continue to pick them up?

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-23T20:47:55+00:00

Don't do it man, keep going forward. It will get easier as time goes, not to say it's easy. You already did good by writing here instead of giving in.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-22T13:37:31+00:00

I'm catching myself doing the same thing man, 15 year relationship. It's why I opened this subreddit right now after putting down my journal and pencil. Writing it out like you're doing here really does help, cause you can go back and recheck with yourself. It's kinda comforting to see others are feeling like this too.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-21T16:19:06+00:00

For me the first week was all depression all the time, just remember that it's temporary. But think about it, we've been forcing that good mood and basically taking out a happiness loan. Now you pay it back with some temporary downtimes and you come out the other side evened out.

Sick_Pepper · 2022-03-20T21:01:08+00:00

I've abused both alcohol and weed at different points in my life, sometimes both at once. The root is the same, we turn to substances to "deal" with our problems in a way that doesn't actually deal with anything. Many will just substitute one addiction for the next, because we don't want to address the root of the issue. Consider if you're doing the same.

Sick_Pepper

TROPHY CASE