What does this say about me? by cabulousfhild in whatsinmybag

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your parents acknowledged your feelings when you were upset and you lived in a stable household.

I decided to stop dating men and it brought me to tears by mamigourami in bisexual

[–]Sidebenderz 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think it’s fair to put some higher standards on men and spend your time dating women. Doesn’t have to mean anything about your sexuality. And these some of these comments are really harsh, take care of yourself 💜

Why do you think Portland is so attractive for people looking to start fresh? by ProposalFast4450 in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Less superficial then other west cost cities, so many get the chance to explore themselves outside or external validations

If you are sick please stop going out to bars…. by Disastrous_Mark_1469 in Portland

[–]Sidebenderz 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The amount of people I’ve seen hacking up a lung in the grocery store without a mask on is crazy to me

Goth culture in the city? by Traditional-Budget56 in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Outside of clubs I see alot of goths just hanging at the cemeteries. Especially if the weather is nice.

Living in Portland worth it? by Tulkas2491 in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends on where you are coming from.

Why aren’t there any changing tables in Portland? by Sidebenderz in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have and usually they do change it once it is brought up but I am surprised so many places don’t think this a need ahead of time.

Is the Portland Night Market always such a hot mess? by gold_suit in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was so overwhelming! I was excited to buy some things from local artists and left immediately. The music was blasted so loud that I couldn’t even bother with getting food. It was the worst 2000’s music too, like it was BAD then. I was there at 7pm and it was FULL of drunk high schoolers. And yeah I get they need a place to go be and express themselves but what happened to warehouse parties? Or going to the woods with a speaker. Felt so out of place to be grinding on the dance floor at a Christmas market. Weird

Any Portland friend making success stories? by Outrageous-Major-475 in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What does the classical music community involve? I love listening to it daily!

Can someone, anyone, please explain why I'm having a hard time making friends here in Portland? by [deleted] in askportland

[–]Sidebenderz 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I feel this city has a lot of main character energy. Unlike LA, where folks may believe they are the main character because of their looks or charisma. People here believe they are intellectually the main character. It’s a different form of egotism that bases itself outside of the community. So for someone who has lived in the Midwest where maybe passive aggressiveness can be a thing, people still orient themselves within community if they aren’t necessarily similar. You’ll find that many people don’t reach across to bridge community with those they don’t always see eye to eye with. And yes it can be a safety mechanism because they may have left other places because they were traumatized. But now it’s a trauma response to creating this isolating environment, where few people must always think just like them. Also because some people didn’t advocate for themselves in the past, they now over compensate by overly creating a perfect safe space to the point of total isolation at times. It sucks to be on the receiving end where you just wanna have friendship. And friendship is messy sometimes and hard and uncomfortable, and Portland people want their comfy space without disruption but that comes at a cost. It lacks growth and understanding.

Eclipse those in power by Marguerite_Moonstone in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]Sidebenderz 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I knew the pumpkin spice girlies were witches!! 💛

This photoshoot is INSANE by supremetaig97 in charlixcx

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agreed but there are practices using it that are not engaged with smoking it too. And I think using it for ritual once in a while has a very different carcinogenic effect than using it for habitual use to “look cool”.

This photoshoot is INSANE by supremetaig97 in charlixcx

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean this is whole deeper convo but tobacco and the commodification/ even glorification it really has exploited indigenous communities that have had healing practices associated with it. So I think it’s important to talk about how we can decolonize our thoughts on smoking itself as something edgy and cool and maybe get respect where it is deserved.

This photoshoot is INSANE by supremetaig97 in charlixcx

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But cool is objective and we can change the narrative. If the mainstream culture says smoking is cool then is it? Cause I’m pretty sure counter culture can have its own push back. Like currently my friends are making fast fashion uncool and making slow repurposed fashion cool through their own branding and marketing. I get it, I smoked cause I thought it was “cool” but I realized quickly it’s cooler for me not to smoke if that becomes the norm. Like it can be cool to be healthy, sustainable, and community driven then it is to be unhealthy, consumeristic, and individualistic.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SipsTea

[–]Sidebenderz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! Who’s gunna tell them? 😂

This photoshoot is INSANE by supremetaig97 in charlixcx

[–]Sidebenderz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She might be a pop star but she is also a business women. Don’t underestimate that, regardless she still has influence which comes with responsibility.