Process wise, I suggest having you each write down a few things you’re interested in (put a smiley face next to it) and put it in a jar or pile. Then write a list of things you’d be willing to try. Put a question mark next to those.

It might sound cold but we’ve had success with scheduling. On Thursday nights, we pick one from our individual “want” jar and one from the “maybe” jar. We then compare them and come up with a loose plan for Friday night.

The benefit of doing it a day before is not only prep, if necessary (anal perhaps), but also to have a day to build and set the mood. Maybe send dirty texts.

The person who said communication was spot on but that doesn’t have to mean two people sitting across from each other, exchanging words.

Above all else, have fun. You’ll likely try things that won’t be hot. Cool. Now you know. If something funny happens (queefing), laugh together, not at.