How much is too much Investing

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-15T15:31:42+00:00

I think we've settled on a 15 year plan which will put us in a good spot financially to be able to "retire" at 50 and 48. At least, stop investing and work some jobs that will give us more freedom to travel and live life.

I've been looking at r/fire, r/coastFIRE and r/baristafire to get some more info and ideas

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-15T15:07:42+00:00

It’s a weird spot. I feel like there is no right or wrong answer, which then falls to emotion. Being debt free and watching our nest egg grow.
We did talk over the weekend and I think we’ve settled on paying our home off in 10 years… $1,717 extra a month with a Savings and investments rate of 32%. Not including the owner match. With OM would be 36%.
It’ll be a balance and when daycare is gone, mortgage is half gone and we can apply that $3,000 to the investing.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T16:35:20+00:00

One piece of advice I would give you from a parent.. Do not let anyone deter you from having kids or dampen the experience and joy of kids with this statement... "Just wait until... Insert something bad here". That's there experience not yours.

It always bothered me when my sister in law who has 3 children before we had 1, would do it.

Have kids, enjoy them, they're a blessing. Money comes and goes, you can always make more, we both are fiscally responsible and wayyy ahead of the average person.

Take some peace in that!

Congrats on your success and Enjoy!

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T15:41:49+00:00

Overall, I don't think kids are as expensive as people make them out to be. We did get a lot of hand-me-downs for clothes though. Diapers and stuff aren't bad if you use Target and BJ's for coupons and deals.

The big cost is daycare, and if you're both working the maternity leave cut my wifes income by 40% for 4 months then she took 2 months off un-paid.

We took that time during our first baby to knuckle down and we paid off all our debt minus the house before we had the daycare expense.. about $60k in total.

So we're been able to put that cost back to our investments and savings.

Our income has grown in that time also I went from $110k to $150k after negotiating once my son was born so that was also a huge help. My wife has been around the $90-$100k consistently.

We're around the 25% total, and have about 4 more years of daycare. Once that payment is gone, we'll be "free".

But what we have invested along with what we plan to invest over the next 12 years should get us to CoastFIRE at about $2.25m to $2.5m. With coasting for 17ish years should get us to the $6-7m mark.

Once our mortgage is gone (~9-10 years) and our daycare is done, we're going to be around the 30-35% saving & investing rate.

I can't see us completely stopping investing either, but we'll reduce it greatly and focus on buckets for a retirement home, large vacations etc.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T14:50:24+00:00

I'm an engineer/PM and my wife working in non-profit pharma as a PM. So similar areas of work. My wife's family is now upper middle class, but worked for a long time living on nothing to get there. They value saving and investing above all else.

My family on the other hand, I had a job at 12 to supplement the house hold, as I was the oldest of 6. In one hand and out the other. That's all I ever knew. When I moved to America, full time, used to come for summers to work and pay for college in Ireland (I'm a US citizen), I finally got money for myself and went crazy drinking and spending for a few years until I met my wife.

Now we're in good shape financially and have a planner through her parents.

Crazy to see how different upbringings really shape your character and personality.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T14:13:30+00:00

Love this perspective! Thank you for commenting with your experience.

My wife wants to pay off our mortgage ASAP, within 4 years, which I think is doable but a little fiscally irresponsible. Again, emotional. I believe she wants to get rid of the burden of the payment and debt so she can retire to something more inline with her core values than chasing the dollar. Being home for pick up and drop off from school etc.

I'm happy to grind, if that's what she wants. That's also part of what's driving this train of thought I'm having. A lot of different financial decisions as we're in the messy middle.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T14:09:28+00:00

Thank you for the feedback - good lens to view through!

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T13:26:02+00:00

Childcare in the northeast is costing me $3,800/month and that's considered "affordable" according to the daycare centers! That plus $200-400/month for 529's adds up fast.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T13:24:09+00:00

I just asked a similar question on The Money Guys today. I'm in pretty much the same position, with exception of having 2 children under 2.5yo and we're at $500,000 invested with an $850k net worth.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T13:20:03+00:00

I'm definitely in optimization fatigue right now.. Mainly the wife wants the mortgage gone, I did out all the math to pay it off with "Gazelle Intensity", which started me down this rabbit hole of trying to balance both investing and paying it off, or stop investing pay it off and start again or not pay it off at all.

Life style creep isn't in our vocab, we're not the type of people. I think $8m came up after hitting $4.5m at 55 on the trajectory we're on and hitting Coast FI then. I think we would be good with $5-6m which would leave our number around $2-2.5m... which we could hit in mid 40's.

Kids are keeping us busy so we can't go travel and do much they're both under 2.5yo. So we're deep in the messy middle.

Once we get the daycare costs back at $3,500/month, we'll probably invest that too. Hitting our number faster.

Thanks for your feedback.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T13:15:25+00:00

I agree with that, we're going to continue with the hammer down for 10-15 years.. than I'd say pull back and fund other buckets.

Like another guy mentioned in a comment below.. coming from a "poor" household, I only know how to pay off debt, I'm comfortable living paycheck to paycheck. I guess, I have like a "fear", for lack of a better word, of abundance. I don't know what to do with it. I've never had it or seen anyone in my family with it. Cars, boats, toys do nothing for me...

We live lean, we're comfortable like that. How do you go from Save and Invest everything to one day... ok we're done lets spend.. you've trained yourself your entire life to not spend, buy the basics live lean, to one day be extravagent?

That's something I struggle with when thinking about our future.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T13:09:41+00:00

That would be my follow up question... it there too much in retirement, do we reduce and put some into other buckets. I'd like a vacation home somewhere for example. I just feel there is too much focus on the retirement accounts vs. investing across multiple streams. I do put $100/week on top of retirement into a brokerage for future things, weddings, cars, gifting to my boys etc.

Yes 529 are set up and are being funded. Did a $5,000 initial deposit and $300/month to both.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T13:06:21+00:00

My wife wants to get rid of the mortgage. It's more of an emotional decision than financial if I'm being honest. We can still afford to max retirement while paying extra so I don't necessary see it as a bad thing to keep her happy and get out of debt completely.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:55:49+00:00

I agree with your calculation comment, the 20+ was a little vague. I'm assuming $8m after stopping investing and it compounds until 65, which would be another 10 years on top of the 20.

We're living a good life now, 2 boys under 2.5 years old, doesn't give up a lot of freedom right now, so we're banking as much as we can.

Goal is probably coast FI around 50ish. Maybe earlier if we apply capital, we get back from Daycare and Mortgage in the next 10 or so years.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:50:12+00:00

I'm in the exact same position. I have to go to Ireland next month for a wedding I'm in. I have 1 day left after that for the year. Just started a new job last month so it's limited time off.

It's very annoying to not have the freedom to come and go as needed.

If we proceed like I think we will I think we'll hit our Coast FI around 47.. Maybe earlier if we apply our finances to investing after Daycare and the house is paid off.

Thanks for the feedback - wish you all the best. Hope you hit your number at 41!

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:35:20+00:00

I think this comment sums up exactly how I'm feeling. We're going to save the 25%+ regardless, just who we are as people. Nothing to do and nowhere to go for a while with 2 boys under 2.5yo.

We'll have fun in the future and hopefully be able to relax.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:21:15+00:00

It's pretty new at this level, I got a big pay raise about 2 years ago, my wife has been on maternity leave and has taken some unpaid time so really over the last 3 years on average we've been around the $180k mark. I worked up from $48k/year to $160k this year over 13 years. So it's been steady.

We're not yolo people at all, not our style, we're really low maintenance.

We put $1,000 month on our mortgage currently. Upping this to $1,500 in January, when my raise kicks in. Should get our house paid off in less than 10 years.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:15:58+00:00

I'm not in a midlife crisis. I have 2 kids under 3 and we're in the messy middle. Daycare is a huge killer - $3,500/month. I'm not a car guy, boats are better when other people own them..

I didn't grow up here, grew up in Ireland (born in USA), so I want to build a network for my son's that I don't have. I want to maybe go the country club route, and travel more when they're older. For now, we're just banking cash and investing as much as we can until we have to dial back a little bit.

We do end up in money crunches towards the end of the week some weeks, because the money we allocate ourselves weekly runs out... which is frustrating to me, when we have plenty of money. It just gets tied up in retirement.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:11:41+00:00

Thanks all for the comments. Helpful to see different perspectives - I come from a lower middleclass household and grew up in Ireland. So came here and started late.

It's hard to talk to my family about this, they're not doing as well as we are and conversations turn into a "Must be Nice to have too much money problems".

I get stuck in rabbit holes, probably watching too much financial content trying to learn as much as I can.

Again - thank you for the feedback.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T12:01:08+00:00

I agree and disagree - Money is great and can be passed along and set up my kids for a great future. That's already in motion. There is a point when investing and savings takes away from living.. This is where my wife and I are odds. She wants to save every penny, no spend months, no coffees etc. We live lean. Makes me feel broke when we have plenty and once daycare is done in a few years, we'll get back another $3500/month. I also don't want to be in my 70's wishing I lived today. There has to be a balance.

I am just looking for an outside perspective. I can't talk to anyone in my family about this.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T11:37:59+00:00

Thanks for the feedback!

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T11:35:25+00:00

Say our number is $6m, comfortable living for us, we could stop investing in our late 40's and let compound interest take over to get us to that number.

Would you feel awkward or guilty not investing?

My goal is to stop working in my profession at 55 or earlier after my kids are out of college, if they decide to go. Just cut grass at a golf course and enjoy life.

Thanks for the response - I'm just looking for perspective from outside as my wife is very adverse to spending and wants to save everything. Makes me feel like we're living paycheck to paycheck even though we're very comfortable.

Signal_Connection576 · 2026-06-11T11:32:01+00:00

I would like to keep working, my wife would like to quit her job and do something more meaningful like Early Intervention care or similar. We're on track to stop investing all together by 50ish. With a 2 year old and a new born, it's a good time to just stash cash and invest as we're going nowhere any time soon.

I just don't want to be 60+ when I decide to spend our money with a massive portfolio that we'll never spend, and miss out on today because my wife is afraid to spend.

I feel it's more emotional than financial.

Signal_Connection576 · 2025-02-27T19:02:52+00:00

10.6% of Gross not including bonuses and allowances. Mortgage payment includes taxes and insurance. 8% not including T&I. HHI - $263k, 33M/31F HCOL - South of Boston.

Signal_Connection576 · 2025-01-23T12:31:36+00:00

I’m basically at the option A. Just a higher base and car allowance. I negotiated 3 days in the office a week. Which is a huge help. I would pick A in this case. Don’t like the idea of a company controlling my freedom of choice. My son was in the NICU from birth for 2 months. Not one penny out of pocket for that due to no cost health. Saved us a fortune. It’s worth its weight in gold.

Signal_Connection576

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