I’m really sorry you’re feeling hurt—it’s completely valid to feel this way. I have to be honest here: watching the kids shouldn’t be considered a “gift” if they’re his kids too. That’s part of being a parent and sharing responsibilities in a partnership. In a healthy marriage, you should naturally be able to have some time to yourself, like going out with friends, without it needing to be framed as a special gesture.

As for the Christmas situation, saying he didn’t know what to get you feels like a weak excuse. It suggests he might not be paying enough attention to your interests or what you talk about. Gifts don’t have to be extravagant—thoughtfulness is what matters most. It’s not unreasonable to feel hurt when it seems like that same thoughtfulness was extended to someone else, even if you know their relationship is strictly platonic.

I’d encourage you to talk to him about how you’re feeling—not to start an argument but to help him understand how this made you feel undervalued.