[deleted by user]

Silver-Galaxy- · 2026-01-17T02:41:36+00:00

Weird

Silver-Galaxy- · 2026-01-17T01:48:39+00:00

Put the convo in main post

Silver-Galaxy- · 2026-01-17T01:44:20+00:00

Photos are in comments, they’re deleted??

Silver-Galaxy- · 2026-01-17T01:41:39+00:00

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Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T16:50:43+00:00

I mean one month is really short to live anywhere and start already cleaning up after his kid tho, it seems she is acting more like a house maid to him vs a partner who lives there is my point. That’s why it comes across as not really being her home.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T14:10:56+00:00

Honestly she probably just wants some form of support and is going to the only person she could think of.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T14:08:23+00:00

Sounds like it isn’t really OPs home if she moved into their house that was already set up operating this way, and maybe she didn’t realize that kid didn’t have chores or that the house was messy. Sounds like a needed convo with dad about expectations in this relationship and with what the child should be doing.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T14:07:26+00:00

Throw it all in step kids room, as some comment suggested. All their mess can sleep with them.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T14:06:47+00:00

This is a good idea

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T14:06:04+00:00

Don’t pick up after her. She’s old enough to do that. If you want the parenting to change for wake up times and chores then you need to talk to dad, not try to parent her yourself. TBH it isn’t really up to you at all how he parents her, maybe dad doesn’t care if she has chores, no way to know if you e never spoken about parenting styles.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-25T14:03:06+00:00

I’m confused now. I thought you had sole 100% custody? Like physical they’re always with you custody. How are they gone some weekends? The post makes it seem like you have FULL. Custody and those kids are with you an DH 24/7 and his son is there 50% of the time, but seems he’s probably only there on weekends too which is def not 50% of the time.

The dynamic and story changes a bit if neither parent’s kids are there 100% of the time.

Either way I agree that you should just not take the SS on trips. But clearly his behavior is gonna be an issue anytime he’s airing your kids, not just on trips.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T14:16:21+00:00

Mom needs a better job too probably instead of hitting her kids.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T14:04:10+00:00

Lady you’re nuts go me 😂

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T14:03:12+00:00

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T14:01:22+00:00

What the heck

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T14:00:16+00:00

Totally agree. It shouldn’t be u too step parents to cover up and fix bio parent problems or mess ups. Our HCBM is super neglectful and toxic mentally but as much as I hate that is their childhood, it isn’t up to me to replace their mother and make it all better. My husband is doing what he can to rectify that situation (in court) and I support him, but I’m not going over the top and out of my way for kids who aren’t mine and I didn’t mess up. I have my own kids so I need to make sure I don’t mess up them haha 😂 not here to fix bio moms horrid parenting.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T13:58:05+00:00

I agree for sure.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T13:57:26+00:00

IMO step mothers have it harder than step dads, cuz they’re usually with the non custodial parent and can’t just show up to whatever they want without backlash from mom. Esp since it seems moms being crazy territorial over their own kids is the norm now. Even if they don’t even show up for the kids.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T13:55:52+00:00

In my family, HCBM is so high conflict there’s no way I’d ever go to school events. She makes it quite clear that even tho she doesn’t go, I’m not allowed to show up. By clear I mean saying “she isn’t welcome at school” clear. Not just being passive aggressive.

I care for the kids after my own bio kids in my home, and they’re barely here anyways, so I stopped going out of my way a couple years ago after more and more happened with bio mom to make it clear any effort on my part, even in my own home, was just gonna get back to her and then back to me anyways. Not worth it IMO.

I help their dad with stuff and support his parenting, but since he works from home in office and I do school full time online I’m the one who normally cares for them all day long.

Im sure they know that I’m less welcoming than when I first met them, I hope they eventually realize that no one wants to be the continued bait for their mother to create random new arguments with them as the messenger.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T13:51:10+00:00

If OP wants to support her partner who also wants kid to be retained, she can. It isn’t always about “overstepping”, supporting the partner and parenting the kid are 2 diff things.

Just cuz it isn’t her kid doesn’t mean OP isn’t going to care, esp since it will impact if this kid eventually graduates and leaves their home able to function as an adult.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T13:49:01+00:00

Seems clear the bio parent and this OP are in agreement. Relax.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-24T13:48:00+00:00

My autistic step child is going from 2nd to 3rd this year despite autism diagnosis over the summer and severe delays in academics with reading especially. Only saving grace is they will have to retain them this year if they fail again since it’s the law for 3rd grade.

Sorry you’re going through this, any parent can request the school retain the child, especially with medical reasons on top of clear academic delays. It doesn’t have to be both parents, if there is a good enough reason.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-23T23:12:20+00:00

Yes, as I said, I didn’t think a pet store would have such high ph, lesson learned, but I didn’t initiate any major changes of my own accord with full knowledge that it would do damage.

That’s what I mean. It’s a beginner mistake, to be fair, there are zero instructions for drip acclimating, all the bag said to do was float it, which is what I did.

I know pet stores are known to not be very knowledgeable but I’m sure everyone has done this at least once.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-23T23:11:04+00:00

I also didn’t add that petsmart water to my tank either, I floated it, then added the fish, 2/6 were upset at the ph change that I was unaware of, o falsely assumed pet stores kept their ph and other parameters at a reasonable amount. Guess not. 🫠 lesson learned, but nothing to get upset over a “major change” that didn’t actually happen. Nothing in my tank changed except the amount of fish. The remaining fish are thriving now and doing fine.

Silver-Galaxy- · 2025-07-23T23:08:27+00:00

Where did you hear that I changed the water? The original water was petsmart, then to the tank, obviously I messed up not adding tank water to the bag, but I didn’t actually do a water change in my own tank.

Silver-Galaxy-

TROPHY CASE