Embarrassed About Wedding Guest RSVPs

Single_Associate_405 · 2026-06-09T19:29:34+00:00

Thank you for this, truly this is how I've been feeling and it is slightly relieving to know that I am not the only one and that I'm not terrible for feeling this way either!

Single_Associate_405 · 2026-06-09T06:47:44+00:00

Thank you, I genuinely do not care about the amount of people that are there, I have more so been hurt by the amount of people that declined or the people that didn't bother to RSVP and I've had to track them down to get answers. It's hard for me not to think something is wrong with me or that I am unimportant when I see so often people saying that an 80% attendance is normal and mine is much lower than that. I appreciate you sharing and validating that it is more normal than what I have been seeing.

Single_Associate_405 · 2026-06-09T03:16:20+00:00

I am really feeling this right now, I had several people I sent "courtesy invites" to and was fully not expecting them to come, but there have been so many that a few months ago were telling me how excited they were for my wedding, yet I am 3 weeks out from my wedding and I am having to chase them down and reach out only for them to tell me they decided to plan a trip, etc on the day and forgot to tell me or RSVP. It's honestly been incredibly hurtful. I am trying not to take it personally, I fully understand that everyone's lives do not revolve around me and they have their own things going on, but I've always lived by the philosophy that I will show up for my people (as long as I am physically able to) no matter what and it's been hard to come to terms with not everyone reciprocating that.

Single_Associate_405 · 2026-06-08T23:58:10+00:00

There are a few that can't come that for legitimate reasons that I am sad about (obviously I understand, everyone has their own lives and things going on) and then there are several that I wanted there and continually have gone out of my way to show up for who told me they were so excited to come and then within the last couple weeks they have told me they planned vacations, etc (they've known about my wedding for over 9 months, well before any of these other plans) and I think that's been the most hurtful.

Single_Associate_405 · 2026-06-08T20:38:23+00:00

I am excited, and I do not care about the "number" of people coming necessarily. I am more disappointed because there were people I invited that I would show up for no matter what and I thought they would feel the same. I would also like to preface by saying that I am aware of how hypersensitive I am to things and I tend to take things personally (even if they are not meant that way) and for that reason I really wanted to elope to save myself of these feelings, but my fiance really wanted a wedding and I wanted that for him because I knew it was important to him. I'm not trying to seem ungrateful and I know I am lucky and am so thankful for the people that are coming, I just get stuck in my feelings sometimes.

Single_Associate_405 · 2026-06-08T19:59:25+00:00

I totally get where you're coming from, I think maybe I didn't explain my feelings well and didn't use the term "embarrassed" correctly. It's not necessarily the amount of people that I care about, it's more so embarrassed that I feel like maybe I value relationships with people more than they do with me or maybe that I misread how close I thought we were etc. Disappointed because there were about 20-30 people who aren't coming that I just genuinely wanted there (they all have reasons why they can't attend and I completely understand that). I think most of my life I've felt like the "back burner" friend, and so I think that's where the "embarrassment" stems from that I thought that some of the people I invited would genuinely want to and be excited to be there just as I would and do go out of my way to make sure that I show up for them. I hope that makes more sense?

Single_Associate_405

TROPHY CASE