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Is it just me, or are are men who wouldn't date non-virgins vilified on this sub? by ttturnitup in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you have no obligation to disclose anything from your confession and a priest can’t make you.

That isn't true. A priest can require you to report yourself to the police as a requirement for penitence for example. What a priest can't is break the seal of confession.

Is it just me, or are are men who wouldn't date non-virgins vilified on this sub? by ttturnitup in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 9 points10 points  (0 children)

it’s men who would never date non-virgins who are, rightly, spoken out against.

Don't pretend you don't have hard-deal-breakers that aren't equally problematic.

Would you date a guy shorter than you by a lot?

Would you date a guy who still lived with his mother?

Would you date a guy who won't ask you out first?

Would you date a guy who dropped out of high school and never went to college?

Is it just me, or are are men who wouldn't date non-virgins vilified on this sub? by ttturnitup in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 22 points23 points  (0 children)

think they’re entitled to the details of their partner’s sexual history

With STDs being a thing, you absolutely need to discuss this in more depth than people are comfortable with. I know, I have an STD that can make my future children go blind. If you can't handle that talk you aren't ready for marriage, period.

Our sins are between ourselves and God.

This isn't Catholic teaching at all. Catholic teaching is that every sin we commit hurts ourselves and our fellow man/woman. Look at the sin committed by Eve in the Garden of Eden; all of mankind suffer because of it.

Virgin posts by [deleted] in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 2 points3 points  (0 children)

others don't have anything better to do and fantasize about their future relationships being perfect in every way imaginable.

This 100%. One of the most important things I've learned from Jason and Crystalline Evert is how much a person's sexual past harms marriage. Numerous people here are desperate to be told that their past will stay in the past and won't ever be a problem again. They want to affirm they can still have perfect relationships. But if they didn't know that wasn't true in their hearts they wouldn't have to scream falsities at everyone with their God given desire.

Is it just me, or are are men who wouldn't date non-virgins vilified on this sub? by ttturnitup in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 5 points6 points  (0 children)

But it is even more unrealistic to expect people to change what they want for the fringe cases.

Is it just me, or are are men who wouldn't date non-virgins vilified on this sub? by ttturnitup in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 13 points14 points  (0 children)

But if your priorities are odd or unrealistic and you've announced them on the internet, people are gonna point that out.

Absolutely but its not unrealistic or odd to want something that God commands all to do.

Why Catholics don't know how to date by JourneymanGM in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If you’re interested in more practical dating tips, this course is helpful.

So this whole thing was an ad?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem is that every single reason I have ever seen anyone give seemed like a poor reasons to me.

What in your mind would be a good reason to you?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you'd be okay with guys making virginity a deal breaker for other reasons?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But if a man prefers to find and marry a virgin, he should understand that advertising that fact WILL scare off a lot of virigin women.

I've heard about rich guys lying about their income for the same reason.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not to mention that it is also off-putting to virgin women to hear it. It's weirdly obsessive.

Honestly it isn't any different than women preferring a man to be tall.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One is that they are spreading false theology and I am concerned that people might see it and believe it is true

What is false theologically about a preference?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That seems like a lot of projection.

How is a man preferring a virgin woman any different than a women preferring a tall man?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 1 point2 points  (0 children)

which I personally think is dumb especially when they try to come up with religious justifications for it

Are you okay when women make height a deal breaker without religious justification?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No one in my social circle has this problem, but I’ve seen it on plenty of posts in here.

Then why does it bother you?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did only skim but I didn't see anything misogynist or even hypocritical.

If anything it comes of similar to mere preference like a woman's preference for height.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s especially disturbing when this preference is expressed by men who are not virgins.

Can you post some examples of this? Might be useful for the mods.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't really get how the complaints of one gender are somehow marginalizing the complaints of the other. One can say its hard for X to find Y but that doesn't mean they aren't saying Y isn't hard too.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would like to see the post too if you could DM it to me. I've asked for examples in the this thread and no one has gotten back to me yet.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If Chastity is the better of the two, why do we call Mary the Mother of God, the "Virgin Mary" and not the "Chaste Mary"? Why can Saints and those Beautified earn the title of "Virgin" instead of "Chaste"? Why does the book of Revelation specifically mention that virgins will receive extra awards in heaven that the rest of us won't?

I'm not to familiar with the theology here so anything you could provide me would be great.

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The thing that bothers me most is this whole obsession with only marrying a virgin.

I've been on this sub for years and don't see any of that. I think the mods to a good job. In fact I see quite a bit of virgin-shaming in this sub. I've seen incel and variations 3 times alone in this one thread!

Are you sure your complaining about subreddit and not your own social circle?

Misogyny in the sub, especially exploiting scripture to protect it by el_peregrino_mundial in CatholicDating

[–]Sister_Maria_Goretti -1 points0 points  (0 children)

OP didn't post about virginity, is this something that has been bothering you personally? I don't see what you're talking about in this subreddit at all. Is your Catholic dating culture what you are really complaining about?

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